Most fighting games have tons of endings, despite the overwhelming majority being a bunch of fart noises. Commie dance-offs and homoerotic incest parties aside, "here's what would've happened if this guy won" is usually way better in theory than in execution. Most times, the alternate-universe champions simply live happily ever after, unceremoniously die, or stare off into space pondering life, the universe, and how to become a better farter.
Sometimes, however, these endings tease strange and intriguing worlds, starring characters way more interesting than the punks who keep winning for real. The writers behind the confusing and disjointed skull-fractured fairy tales currently passed off as "storylines" really should have embraced the following when they had the chance ...
5Mortal Kombat: Raiden and the Elder Gods Destroy the World
Raiden, Mortal Kombat's benevolent thunder god, wasn't always a hero to puny humans. But he was always a fucking god. How Liu "Bloodlusty Ryu" Kang managed to get past him in the official timeline, I have no clue. Apparently, you just savate kick a thunderstorm until it goes away.
Either way, it's a damn shame Kang won, and not just because he's drier than a stale bread sandwich with a side order of cinnamon powder. It's also because Raiden as Grand Champion would've won us this reality:
Yep, before Midway drafted him to protect Earthrealm, Raiden was the worst kind of immortal: evil, arrogant, and utterly uninterested in any life that ends through non-lightning-shooting-out-of-your-asshole means. As champion, Raiden spends years effortlessly turning back challenger after challenger, growing so bored that he turns the entire tournament into Immortal Kombat, a nonstop rumble orgy where the only entry requirement is the inability to die.
As great as Mortal Kombat II was, an entire game of mean immortal assholes beating the eternity out of one another would have been even better. And because they're dicks, they'd fight on Earth, allowing you to destroy towns, cities, countries, and the whole damn environment along with punching your opponent in half. What's the downside? A corpse might get stuck between your toes? Maybe a bit of mountain? Scrape that shit off and get back to breaking Osiris in half.
And quit wearing shoes that make you look like a damn kamel.
Yes, Osiris. The Egyptian god of death (feel free to worship him; he's been awful lonely these past few millennia). Immortal Kombat just wouldn't feel legit without some real ancients in on the action. Maybe, sick of being neglected, they unite and attack Raiden and Friends in a bid for universal supremacy. Whatever their reason, the result remains the same -- dozens of deities fight so goddamn hard that humanity explodes in a mushroom cloud of feces and boners. And the kombatants barely notice.
Plus, it's way more realistic than Johnny Cage's ending:
They successfully killed the careers of everyone involved, so technically it's true, from a certain point of view.
4Tekken 3: Yoshimitsu Unleashes a Gigantic Murderous Ogre-Mouse
Tekken 3 teases a wonderfully batshit break from the canonical monotony of Heihachi Mishima and his family winning time and again like a clan of kung-fu Yankees. Yoshimitsu, an armor-clad Robin Hood who embraced scary Green Goblin cosplay long before Willem Dafoe made it cool, wants to revive a dying friend with a potion crafted from the blood of Ogre, a giant winged monster so ruthlessly badass that the original pronunciation of his name is the sound of someone shitting their pants.
"Time for a between-fight snack."
Yoshi defeats Ogre and mixes his blood into potion form. But before the big, life-giving chug, he tests it out on a caged lab rat. And then we get the wettest PETA dream of all: The cute little field mouse has a massive growth spurt that leaves him the size of a castle and monstrously pissed off at, well, you:
Sadly, we only see Ogre Mouse for a split second, as the screen fades to black before he gets to gnaw through Yoshi's armor and feast on the tender meaty filling like the world's most disturbing ravioli. Because, let's face it -- a mouse that big would look at everything like it was made by Chef Boyardee. Also, it's infused with murderous Ogre DNA, so definitely no more settling disputes with a mere timid squeak.
Except for your timid squeak. Of which there would be many.
If Tekken 4 had pounced on this instead of Family Matters Part Yawn, it could've added a whole new degree of both difficulty and unpredictability. Imagine playing as Whoever, delivering combo after combo and destroying Whatsizname's will to live, when Ogre-Mouse appears totally at random, squashing your opponent and immediately eyeing you as its next victim. Being roughly 20 times your size, you wouldn't be able to kill it -- you could only make it go away long enough for you to advance a bit in the tournament.
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"We're gonna need a bigger cheese wheel."
And it just keeps happening over and over again, even after you think you've won the game, because Nemesis Jerry has no concept of victory. His only wish is to pass you through his rectum as a football-sized black pellet.