Cracked Columnists

2012 ... The Realistic Edition

I don't know much at all about Roland Emmerich's (The Day After Tomorrow, Independence Day, Godzilla, 10,000 BC) latest piece of apoca-schlock 2012, other than that it's based on the vague assumption that the Mayan calendar calling for "a great shift" means tidal waves will kill us all.

Of course, with the ice caps melting faster than butter hurled defiantly at the sun, that prediction may turn out to be accurate. Here's hoping that's not the only Escape From Los Angeles-related prediction to come to fruition.

While we're waiting to see if the Mayans knew what they were talking about, or if Snake Plissken will end up deactivating all of the world's technology, here's a preview for a movie that predicts a much more plausible 2012 disaster.

IMPORTANT NOTICE: The thing at the end telling you to google "why is this movie called 'Bees?'" is not a legitimate instruction, but rather a parody of the nonsensical instruction at the end of the original trailer (linked in the article). Normally I wouldn't spoon feed my readers, and would instead simply laugh at all the time people wasted searching for something that's a complete non sequitor, but it was brought to my attention that some malicious Internetters have taken advantage of people searching the term and set up some impromptu malware sites. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

When not inviting international sanctions, Michael serves as head writer for and co-founder of Those Aren't Muskets!