Go Ask Alice… If Buffy Is Delusional
by Gladstone
If you’re wondering when you’ll get a chance to see Sarah Michelle Gellar in the movies again, then you might have to keep wondering. Reportedly, the actress, best known for Buffy the Vampire Slayer, was to star in a remake of Alice in Wonderland, but the film has suffered numerous delays.
Gellar told reporters she is certain the movie will get made with her in the lead, but this recording of a call made to her agent indicates the former TV star is less than confident.
Gladstone writes for Cracked and others. Go to Wayne Gladstone Lives in Maine to see all his published stuff, links to his other worthless endeavors, and his full name and state of residence.
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Gladstone’s vlog was funnier than Swaim’s….
What’s this world coming to?
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:11 pm
TOLD YA GLADSTONE!
Also: OMG I’M ALIVE!
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:23 pm
Are you still right, if I only get two comments in a half an hour and one of them is you?
I guess the Cracked readers are all just busy trying to reconcile my appearance with that sexy avatar of mine…
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Gladstone, I don’t know how to make you feel better besides offering you this life lesson:
Life ain’t nothing… but bitches and money.
Hope that helpes.
January 23rd, 2008 at 4:43 pm
I love SMG. So sleek and sexy. And it puts out soooo many rounds per second.
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:06 pm
Pretty good, pretty good.
The writing was great, in my opinion, but I think the pacing or something was a bit off. Maybe if you talked faster? Maybe play up the sleeze-bag agent angle? Just my two cents.
Also, if I had to have an internet celebrity pick me up in a back alley on the “down-low”, it would still be Swaim.
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:54 pm
I would just like you all to know I overdubed the phone ring in post production and that’s something none of you will ever be able to take away from me.
For all those attempting to catalyze an in-house blog war, please know that Swaim and I have already planned a comedic haiku to the death for next Monday.
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:57 pm
The movie’s not based on the book by Lewis Carroll, but the video game, based loosely on the book, by American McGee. Marcus Nispel (of Texas Chainsaw Massacre fame) is set to direct.
http://imdb.com/title/tt0466663/
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Brilliant.
Also, I hope that movie never gets made. While a good movie adaptaion of Alice would be fantastic, such a thing seems highly unlikely, particularly with Buffy playing Alice. Even if they got someone the right age and appearance, video game movies are never good.
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:10 pm
Please feed your load of crap to the anorexic girl in the pantsless snorg ad.
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:14 pm
Brenda? Are you referring to my crap or Wallsy’s crap? And what’s the crap part?
January 23rd, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Sorry huffing paint does not for a coherent comment make. Wallsy is nothing short of brilliant; obviously those obscene smileys are the comedy/tragedy mask symbol torn in half to show his subtle yet powerful commentary on the state of the video game movie industry. Shame on you for suggesting otherwise. Now someone please feed the snorg girl, seriously, I’m worried about her.
January 24th, 2008 at 8:13 am
I feed her a mixture of cocaine and laxatives. She ’s gonna be a star!
January 24th, 2008 at 12:14 pm
I’ll get the EMT’s.
January 24th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
I’m still holding out for Cruel Intentions II: Just Girls Kissing.
January 24th, 2008 at 1:24 pm
P.S. It clearly says on the Snorg girl’s t-shirt “I have the Body of a God.” Are you calling her shirt a liar, Brenda? (If so, I believe the shirt can sue you in the U.K.)
January 25th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Snorg must be the bitch of the ironic t stores if they can’t afford a decently hot young lady.
January 27th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Someone with a screen name of “SMGisthebest” just commented on the YouTube version of this post: “Fuck you!”
How great is that? I got a comment from Sarah Michelle Gellar!