Conan, I Will Totally Scab For You. Just Say The Word.
Considering the fact that Conan O’Brien wrote some of The Simpsons‘ funniest episodes (see exhibit A, Marge vs. the Monorail), I tuned to NBC on Thursday night assuming he would weather the writer’s strike without much problem.
I realized I was horrifically mistaken right about the second time he spun his wedding ring on his desk, an activity that took about three minutes at a stretch, and which he told the audience at the top of the show “he did when he was bored in rehearsals.”
Now THAT is an entertainer: “Oh this? This that I’m doing right now? This is what I do when there’s nothing interesting going on. This right here. We’ll be back after these messages.”
On the one hand, he played it classy by manning up and discussing the strike, supporting the writers, and admitting (way too frequently) that he was “just killing time.” On the other hand, who the hell wants to watch Conan O’Brien underperform an hour every night? I mean besides his wife.
In a lot of ways it reminded me of watching my grandfather try and entertain young children. There was the weird fascination with his beard (slow panning shots of which replaced most of the monologue), the manic clown-like dancing, and of course the glazed look of desperation whenever it dawned on him that he still had ten minutes to go before Saget came on. At that point, he would invariably say something hilarious like “this water is good,” “this is really good water,” or “you can’t get good water like this.”
He also showed a short video touring his office, revealing once and for all that he’s exactly as you imagine him to be: he plays electric guitar, talks into an old rotary phone, and performs puppet shows with an action figure of himself. In short, he’s your college roommate trying (unsuccessfully) to impress a girl into sleeping with him.
So thank you, Conan, for proving your dedication to the writers with a graphic depiction of why they are so very necessary. Here’s to your unsettling beard and funnier days.
Besides blogging for CRACKED, Michael also makes hilarious videos as writer and co-founder of Those Aren’t Muskets!
January 4th, 2008 at 8:13 am
FIRST!!!11!
January 4th, 2008 at 8:29 am
Hey man, don’t knock good water.
Getting tasty stuff like that in the city is damn near impossible!
January 4th, 2008 at 8:50 am
Damn it, is every post going to start with “FIRST!” now just because some ass did it in the previous blog?
January 4th, 2008 at 9:38 am
Nick, you’re just jealous ’cause YOU weren’t first. Now I’ll leave you ’cause I’m gonna be hanging out in the realm of us first posters, where everything is made out of chocolate and the streets are paved with gold.
January 4th, 2008 at 11:44 am
He’s still funny. But it’s really fucking hard coming up with new material EVERY SINGLE DAY, that is to last for an hour and a half show. Not easy. Not easy at all.
Also, beards are taking over everywhere I go. 2008 is the Year of the Beard. I’m rockin’ one.
January 4th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
I wish I could grow a beard.
I also wish I had my own talk show where I could spin my (alleged) wedding ring, and drink water to get laughs. I can do that.
January 4th, 2008 at 8:36 pm
quite right
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January 4th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
January 4th, 2008 at 11:02 pm
Why do you hate us?
January 5th, 2008 at 12:16 am
Bullshit, the part where he toured the studio was one of the funniest things he’s done in a long time.
January 5th, 2008 at 1:02 am
Really? REALLY?! Hmm…I mean, fine, good, I just really disagree. But that’s cool; I’m glad you liked it. I just think you put that up against something like the visit to the historical reenactment society or the visit to the asian healing center and it’s no contest.
January 5th, 2008 at 1:03 am
Or by “funniest thing in a while” are you taking into account that he hasn’t done ANYTHING for two months?
January 7th, 2008 at 9:45 am
To be fair, writers have a hard time ‘writing’ for a show when the premise is based around interviewing people.
It doesn’t take a lot of prompting to know when to kiss someone’s ass.
January 8th, 2008 at 11:57 am
You are completely wrong.
Conan doesn’t need writers, he’s not allowed to write while the WGA is on strike. Jay Leno has been writing his monologues while the strike is still on and he’s in hot water for it.
This is a completely unfair review of Conan’s unscripted work as he is not allowed to write any scripts, instead filming improvised exterior gags and improvising in the studio.
January 8th, 2008 at 12:33 pm
i liked him doing “sabotage” as edith bunker.
January 9th, 2008 at 12:39 am
conan is god’s gift to comdey, whatever he does is golden. his unwritten shows are here to keep the good days in bad days in perspective.
January 9th, 2008 at 12:40 am
typos.