Comments on: Electric Eels, Christmas Trees and Autograph Magazine Totally Exists: The Daily Nooner (EST)! http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/ The CRACKED.com take on the world, in America's oldest weblog, since 1958. Sun, 06 Jul 2008 06:05:09 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5 By: Joanna4fun http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-35507 Joanna4fun Sat, 14 Jun 2008 16:24:16 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-35507 Nice post! I will recommend the site to my online friends at ___PlusMeet.c o m___, where many big boob women, big booty women and big manful guys meet and seek fun&romance together! Keep up the good work! Nice post! I will recommend the site to my online friends at ___PlusMeet.c o m___, where many big boob women, big booty women and big manful guys meet and seek fun&romance together! Keep up the good work!

]]> By: orangemtl http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-13587 orangemtl Wed, 19 Mar 2008 00:44:11 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-13587 Hey, 'true'---thanks for the big pat on the back. Now I'm going to take a spin in my Hummer, heat up the world just a LITTLE bit more, maybe spend some of that 50% of the world that we 1% control---and maybe, JUST maybe if I'm feeling a bit frisky, roast a coupla baby seals over the fireplace. Fun! Hey, ‘true’—thanks for the big pat on the back. Now I’m going to take a spin in my Hummer, heat up the world just a LITTLE bit more, maybe spend some of that 50% of the world that we 1% control—and maybe, JUST maybe if I’m feeling a bit frisky, roast a coupla baby seals over the fireplace. Fun!

]]> By: true http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-10214 true Tue, 26 Feb 2008 23:05:14 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-10214 Don’t believe one optimistic word from any public figure about the economy or humanity in general. They are all part of the problem. Its like a game of Monopoly. In America, the richest 1% now hold 1/2 OF ALL UNITED STATES WEALTH. Unlike ‘lesser’ estimates, this includes all stocks, bonds, cash, and material assets held by America’s richest 1%. Even that filthy pig Oprah acknowledged that it was at about 50% in 2006. Naturally, she put her own ‘humanitarian’ spin on it. Calling attention to her own ‘good will’. WHAT A DISGUSTING HYPOCRITE SLOB. THE RICHEST 1% HAVE LITERALLY MADE WORLD PROSPERITY ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. Don’t fall for all of their ‘humanitarian’ CRAP. ITS A SHAM. THESE PEOPLE ARE CAUSING THE SAME PROBLEMS THEY PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT. Ask any professor of economics. Money does not grow on trees. The government can’t just print up more on a whim. At any given time, there is a relative limit to the wealth within ANY economy of ANY size. So when too much wealth accumulates at the top, the middle class slip further into debt and the lower class further into poverty. A similar rule applies worldwide. The world’s richest 1% now own over 40% of ALL WORLD WEALTH. This is EVEN AFTER you account for all of this ‘good will’ ‘humanitarian’ BS from celebrities and executives. ITS A SHAM. As they get richer and richer, less wealth is left circulating beneath them. This is the single greatest underlying cause for the current US recession. The middle class can no longer afford to sustain their share of the economy. Their wealth has been gradually transfered to the richest 1%. One way or another, we suffer because of their incredible greed. We are talking about TRILLIONS of dollars. Transfered FROM US TO THEM. Over a period of about 27 years. Thats Reaganomics for you. The wealth does not ‘trickle down’ as we were told it would. It just accumulates at the top. Shrinking the middle class and expanding the lower class. Causing a domino effect of socio-economic problems. But the rich will never stop. They will never settle for a reasonable share of ANYTHING. They will do whatever it takes to get even richer. Leaving even less of the pie for the other 99% of us to share. At the same time, they throw back a few tax deductable crumbs and call themselves ‘humanitarians’. IT CAN’T WORK THIS WAY. This is going to end just like a game of Monopoly. The current US recession will drag on for years and lead into the worst US depression of all time. The richest 1% will live like royalty while the rest of us fight over jobs, food, and gasoline. Crime, poverty, and suicide will skyrocket. So don’t fall for all of this PR CRAP from Hollywood, Pro Sports, and Wall Street PIGS. ITS A SHAM. Remember: They are filthy rich EVEN AFTER their tax deductable contributions. Greedy pigs. Now, we are headed for the worst economic and cultural crisis of all time. SEND A “THANK YOU” NOTE TO YOUR FAVORITE MILLIONAIRE. ITS THEIR FAULT. I’m not discounting other factors like China, sub-prime, or gas prices. But all of those factors combined still pale in comparison to that HUGE transfer of wealth to the rich. Anyway, those other factors are all related and further aggrivated because of GREED. If it weren’t for the OBSCENE distribution of wealth within our country, there never would have been such a market for sub-prime to begin with. Which by the way, was another trick whipped up by greedy bankers and executives. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. The credit industry has been ENDORSED by people like Oprah, Ellen, Dr Phil, and many other celebrities. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. So don’t fall for their ‘humanitarian’ BS. ITS A SHAM. NOTHING BUT TAX DEDUCTABLE PR CRAP. Bottom line: The richest 1% will soon tank the largest economy in the world. It will be like nothing we’ve ever seen before. and thats just the beginning. Greed will eventually tank every major economy in the world. Causing millions to suffer and die. Oprah, Angelina, Brad, Bono, and Bill are not part of the solution. They are part of the problem. EXTREME WEALTH HAS MADE WORLD PROSPERITY ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. WITHOUT WORLD PROSPERITY, THERE WILL NEVER BE WORLD PEACE OR ANYTHING EVEN CLOSE. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL. Of course, the rich will throw a fit and call me a madman. Of course, their ignorant fans will do the same. You have to expect that. But I speak the truth. If you don’t believe me, then copy this entry and run it by any professor of economics or socio-economics. Then tell a friend. Call the local radio station. Re-post this entry or put it in your own words. Be one of the first to predict the worst economic and cultural crisis of all time and explain its cause. WE ARE IN BIG TROUBLE. Don’t believe one optimistic word from any public figure about the economy or humanity in general. They are all part of the problem. Its like a game of Monopoly. In America, the richest 1% now hold 1/2 OF ALL UNITED STATES WEALTH. Unlike ‘lesser’ estimates, this includes all stocks, bonds, cash, and material assets held by America’s richest 1%. Even that filthy pig Oprah acknowledged that it was at about 50% in 2006. Naturally, she put her own ‘humanitarian’ spin on it. Calling attention to her own ‘good will’. WHAT A DISGUSTING HYPOCRITE SLOB. THE RICHEST 1% HAVE LITERALLY MADE WORLD PROSPERITY ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. Don’t fall for all of their ‘humanitarian’ CRAP. ITS A SHAM. THESE PEOPLE ARE CAUSING THE SAME PROBLEMS THEY PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT. Ask any professor of economics. Money does not grow on trees. The government can’t just print up more on a whim. At any given time, there is a relative limit to the wealth within ANY economy of ANY size. So when too much wealth accumulates at the top, the middle class slip further into debt and the lower class further into poverty. A similar rule applies worldwide. The world’s richest 1% now own over 40% of ALL WORLD WEALTH. This is EVEN AFTER you account for all of this ‘good will’ ‘humanitarian’ BS from celebrities and executives. ITS A SHAM. As they get richer and richer, less wealth is left circulating beneath them. This is the single greatest underlying cause for the current US recession. The middle class can no longer afford to sustain their share of the economy. Their wealth has been gradually transfered to the richest 1%. One way or another, we suffer because of their incredible greed. We are talking about TRILLIONS of dollars. Transfered FROM US TO THEM. Over a period of about 27 years. Thats Reaganomics for you. The wealth does not ‘trickle down’ as we were told it would. It just accumulates at the top. Shrinking the middle class and expanding the lower class. Causing a domino effect of socio-economic problems. But the rich will never stop. They will never settle for a reasonable share of ANYTHING. They will do whatever it takes to get even richer. Leaving even less of the pie for the other 99% of us to share. At the same time, they throw back a few tax deductable crumbs and call themselves ‘humanitarians’. IT CAN’T WORK THIS WAY. This is going to end just like a game of Monopoly. The current US recession will drag on for years and lead into the worst US depression of all time. The richest 1% will live like royalty while the rest of us fight over jobs, food, and gasoline. Crime, poverty, and suicide will skyrocket. So don’t fall for all of this PR CRAP from Hollywood, Pro Sports, and Wall Street PIGS. ITS A SHAM. Remember: They are filthy rich EVEN AFTER their tax deductable contributions. Greedy pigs. Now, we are headed for the worst economic and cultural crisis of all time. SEND A “THANK YOU” NOTE TO YOUR FAVORITE MILLIONAIRE. ITS THEIR FAULT. I’m not discounting other factors like China, sub-prime, or gas prices. But all of those factors combined still pale in comparison to that HUGE transfer of wealth to the rich. Anyway, those other factors are all related and further aggrivated because of GREED. If it weren’t for the OBSCENE distribution of wealth within our country, there never would have been such a market for sub-prime to begin with. Which by the way, was another trick whipped up by greedy bankers and executives. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. The credit industry has been ENDORSED by people like Oprah, Ellen, Dr Phil, and many other celebrities. IT MAKES THEM RICHER. So don’t fall for their ‘humanitarian’ BS. ITS A SHAM. NOTHING BUT TAX DEDUCTABLE PR CRAP. Bottom line: The richest 1% will soon tank the largest economy in the world. It will be like nothing we’ve ever seen before. and thats just the beginning. Greed will eventually tank every major economy in the world. Causing millions to suffer and die. Oprah, Angelina, Brad, Bono, and Bill are not part of the solution. They are part of the problem. EXTREME WEALTH HAS MADE WORLD PROSPERITY ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE. WITHOUT WORLD PROSPERITY, THERE WILL NEVER BE WORLD PEACE OR ANYTHING EVEN CLOSE. GREED KILLS. IT WILL BE OUR DOWNFALL. Of course, the rich will throw a fit and call me a madman. Of course, their ignorant fans will do the same. You have to expect that. But I speak the truth. If you don’t believe me, then copy this entry and run it by any professor of economics or socio-economics. Then tell a friend. Call the local radio station. Re-post this entry or put it in your own words. Be one of the first to predict the worst economic and cultural crisis of all time and explain its cause. WE ARE IN BIG TROUBLE.

]]> By: zeke http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-6427 zeke Mon, 28 Jan 2008 17:49:53 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-6427 Do the Japs even celebrate xmas? Fucking Eel power. Bad ass. I want that eel car. I'd have it all clear on the outside so people can see the eels smimming around. Do they shock each other? How do they mate? Well, if they shocked each other, I'd make separate see thru containers for them, no biggie. What if a positive eel got together with a negative one? Would they stick together? Fucking change your polarity, Fred!! I kill myself. Do the Japs even celebrate xmas? Fucking Eel power. Bad ass. I want that eel car. I’d have it all clear on the outside so people can see the eels smimming around. Do they shock each other? How do they mate? Well, if they shocked each other, I’d make separate see thru containers for them, no biggie. What if a positive eel got together with a negative one? Would they stick together? Fucking change your polarity, Fred!! I kill myself.

]]> By: Paddy http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3529 Paddy Fri, 21 Dec 2007 23:00:35 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3529 Gotta imagine Reagan isn't signing many autographs these days... Also, as cool as the eel thing is in theory, anybody notice how the tree would flicker wildly as the eel moved? This is Japan people, the nation which concieved of a game show consisting of people being fired out of port-a-potties on jetskis, can't they develop something to prevent the eel powered tree from causing seizures? Gotta imagine Reagan isn’t signing many autographs these days…
Also, as cool as the eel thing is in theory, anybody notice how the tree would flicker wildly as the eel moved? This is Japan people, the nation which concieved of a game show consisting of people being fired out of port-a-potties on jetskis, can’t they develop something to prevent the eel powered tree from causing seizures?

]]> By: Dreadnought http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3494 Dreadnought Fri, 21 Dec 2007 12:00:49 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3494 How do you fix a broken tuba? With a tuba glue!!! I'll be here all week, try the veal. I broke the calves legs myself. How do you fix a broken tuba?

With a tuba glue!!!

I’ll be here all week, try the veal. I broke the calves legs myself.

]]> By: Diaz http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3424 Diaz Thu, 20 Dec 2007 17:50:48 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3424 I actually delved into your "esoteric" magazine world for a minute, starting with Tubanews.com. Here is a snippet I pulled off the site : "Frequently, because of my affiliation with TubaNews, my own web site and blog, I’ve been asked to review some the new tuba CDs arriving on the market." a. He uses the word frequently in regards to his expertise in all things tuba. Fascinating. How frequent can it possibly be? Once a month? b. "...new tuba CDs arriving on the market." What market is that!? Are these CDs that are solely tuba, or tuba-centric.. I need to know. I'm going to investigate. Tubanews has me fascinated. I guess the eels were pretty cool too. I actually delved into your “esoteric” magazine world for a minute, starting with Tubanews.com. Here is a snippet I pulled off the site :

“Frequently, because of my affiliation with TubaNews, my own web site and blog, I’ve been asked to review some the new tuba CDs arriving on the market.”

a. He uses the word frequently in regards to his expertise in all things tuba. Fascinating. How frequent can it possibly be? Once a month?

b. “…new tuba CDs arriving on the market.” What market is that!? Are these CDs that are solely tuba, or tuba-centric.. I need to know. I’m going to investigate.

Tubanews has me fascinated. I guess the eels were pretty cool too.

]]> By: blemm http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3377 blemm Wed, 19 Dec 2007 23:04:59 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3377 "It might be less wooden performance than Keanu Reeves…" It'd probably be a lot more fluid. “It might be less wooden performance than Keanu Reeves…”

It’d probably be a lot more fluid.

]]> By: Dreadnought http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3373 Dreadnought Wed, 19 Dec 2007 22:20:30 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3373 It might be less wooden performance than Keanu Reeves... It might be less wooden performance than Keanu Reeves…

]]> By: Beppo http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3372 Beppo Wed, 19 Dec 2007 22:17:12 +0000 http://www.cracked.com/blog/2007/12/19/electric-eels-christmas-trees-and-autograph-magazine-totally-exists-the-daily-nooner-est/#comment-3372 We need to make a virtual world for the eels. But then a Neo-eel would rise up and do whatever it was he did! Zoom around and shit. Actually, I would totally watch an all-eel version of The Matrix. We need to make a virtual world for the eels. But then a Neo-eel would rise up and do whatever it was he did! Zoom around and shit.
Actually, I would totally watch an all-eel version of The Matrix.

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