Diarrhea, Japanese People and The Fashion of the Future: The (Friday) Nooner (EST)!
Awesome Video Of The Day
I Have A Bad Case Of Diarrhea
I always thought Japanese people were total badasses, what with the Shogun warriors and the Seppuku and all that, but apparently I was all turned around on the subject. It turns out that Japanese people are actually huge sissies who call an ambulance every time they get diarrhea.
Shouldn’t the whole death-before-surrender thing come into play here? If you’re Japanese, doesn’t checking yourself into a hospital for your explosive diarrhea bring shame upon your family or something? Maybe I’m misinterpreting this whole thing. Maybe they’re trying to learn the English for “I have a bad case of diarrhea” because they assume that traveling to an English-speaking country means they’re almost certainly going to have to say it at some point. In that case, though, I’d assume that a Japanese person would pretend they DIDN’T have diarrhea to avoid imposing on anyone. You know - because it’s rude. On the other hand, so is blasting diarrhea all over a bench at a bus stop. I’m pretty sure that’s a rule of thumb no matter what country you’re in.
Then again, what do I know? This video was the first time I’ve ever seen a Japanese person in my entire life.
With Winter just around the corner, it’s time to make preparations for the cold months ahead. You’re going to want to load up on batteries and canned food and have an emergency plan for your family and all that, but more importantly, you’d better figure out what you’re going to wear. Navigating the gauntlet that is Men’s Fashion can be scary, but don’t worry: I’ve done all the homework for you, and this week on the Cracked Blog I’ll be bringing you my five top picks for the season.
The Cracked Guide To Men’s Winter Fashion
Label: John Galliano
Materials: Leather, Steel, Wires, Blank CDs
Message It Sends To The World: “I am a Sun God from a distant post-apocalyptic future. Oh - and I’m wearing stuff I found in the garbage.”
Features
Price: Not for sale
November 30th, 2007 at 12:03 pm
I’m going to be chanting ‘I have a bad case of diallhea’ all day now. Thanks.
November 30th, 2007 at 12:18 pm
Those english videos are the best. My favorite one has to be the one where they instruct you in what to say if you get mugged, though…
And the men’s fashion… wow. XD It is cool looking if totally impractical.
November 30th, 2007 at 12:59 pm
Pathagora Suitchi will stay in your head even longer. These little things plays at commercial times for a children’s educational program. So while Japanese children are tackling Rube Goldberg devices, are are learning that today’s letter is “D.”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQHViJ94CG4
November 30th, 2007 at 3:56 pm
Er…I myself am Japanese (half asian, and some native american a little)
and im fairly certain that this is just a way to teach japanese speakers english…i just think they choose the wrong thing to say with the ambulance…personally this show could be intended for children who are wanting to learn engllish, if its not just for children its just that they are teaching how to say that, now personally i find it funny however it doesnt change the fact that some people who when sick typically go to a hospital if they cant afford anywhere else to go to get medicine, they could have choose better words such as ” can you tell me where a doctor is” then when upon arriving at the doctor or hospital they might not know much else but they know to say what their problem is to the doctor to get them help ” I have a bad case of diarrhea” and im pretty certain not all Japanese people go about calling an ambulance when they have diarrhea or what not but they will go to a hospital or doctor just like anyone else would in america lol =P
November 30th, 2007 at 5:03 pm
Thanks, Mr. Data! When are you getting your humor chip installed?
November 30th, 2007 at 11:35 pm
Who makes these videos and why do they think announcing that you have diarrhea to people and asking them to call an ambulance for it is a common occurance in America?
December 1st, 2007 at 12:29 am
From the nation that brought us “Tubgirl”…
December 1st, 2007 at 1:09 am
My wife is Japanese and she gets mad at me if I don’t go to the hospital when I get a cold. Sac up, Japan!
December 1st, 2007 at 1:54 am
Self aware humor is the best kind. The parody in those videos is top notch. The fact that people actually believe it’s real is what’s so great.
December 1st, 2007 at 4:07 am
the other day, I met a Japanese rich women on the adult site called sugarmommymeet.com. it is a service for rich women seeking handsome and charming men from all walks of life. she treat me as king. in the same way, i treat her with respect…..
December 1st, 2007 at 6:15 am
I have the pleasure of currently living in Japan… and a lot of their TV commercials, morning shows and sitcoms are this ridiculous as well. They make everything cute or funny or both. Even diarrhea.
Maybe it’s an Asian thing since I see the same silly things on Korean and Chinese TV channels. *shrug*
December 2nd, 2007 at 7:29 am
I think it’s to account for the disciplined ultraviolence.
Or maybe to cover said ultraviolence with a veneer of cuteness. For international relations purposes
December 3rd, 2007 at 12:25 am
well. you can dislike it but you can’t deny that it suits lots of people who are pleasant to pay for the tv show.
December 3rd, 2007 at 2:31 am
To be fair this video looks about 20 years old. But they are a country of wimps. I can’t tell how many times I have heard ” I had to goto hospital because I have very bad cold” pussies. If you want something good check out oshiri gajiri mushi the ass biting bug
December 3rd, 2007 at 8:12 am
Sorry to burst the bubble of fun, but this show was made a long time ago as a satire. Both Aerobic shows and English education shows were very popular at the time, so a comedian had the bright idea to put the two together, with hilarious results.
December 4th, 2007 at 1:40 pm
I’m just glad they got the Fanta girls to do the aerobics part.
December 5th, 2007 at 8:40 pm
hey theres a way better one than that! one where japanese pps are taught how to say a man stole my bag -you gotta hand it to them they really started the trend in the whole combing aerobics and learning a new language thing -and when i say trend i mean…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0W1VY4b9IQQ