So I guess it’s inauguration day today, which means that right now as you read this President Bush is probably frantically running from room to room of the White House, panicked that he accidentally packed up and shipped his car keys to Texas. There is also the possibility he is playing in a large cardboard box.
And that’s it for the Bush jokes folks. I’ve actually been pretty good about avoiding them I think, and I won’t miss their tediousness in the world of political humor. But there’s just something about the image of a grown man tumbling down a staircase in a cardboard box, smashing into portraits of better presidents, you know?
And just as the sun sets on Bush-jokes, the sun starts to shine on jokes about insane Obama-fandom. From the handsome and sturdy example on your right, to the 18 others I’ve selected below, there’s a whole host of lunatic things lunatic-people have made to celebrate their love of Barack Obama. Let’s cast a mature and not-at-all petty eye on some of it, shall we?
This one’s actually pretty cute, and compared to some of the other obaminations to come, pretty true to form. The limitations of the clothespin framing device do render the president as being pretty in need of a bathroom break though.
___
A nice Obama paper towel holder says “Let’s get down to work,” and “Grrr, I hate messes.”
___
This is actually an Obama Angel, although the wings are a little subdued in this shot, looking a little bit like the napkins makeup artists tuck into your collar. I guess this is a representation of what Obama looks like before they get a chance to tidy up his gigantism a bit.
___
Wow. That sure is one lumpy ass president. I can see cats just freaking right the hell out if you placed them in a room with this.
___
Glow in the Dark Obama Bottle Stopper
If you’ve ever found yourself fumbling around in the dark, looking for a bottle of wine that represents change, then here, improbably, is the perfect solution for you.
___
Obama’s been conflated with religious figures before, but this is the first time I’ve seen that happen in a form that would be useful if left next to the toilet.
___
I think the funniest way to use this would be to put it on your dog, then walk around your neighborhood acting like you were a die-hard Republican, just constantly hurling abuse at it. “Can you believe this socialist?” you’d say to strangers at the park, while you aimed kicks at it. “Tax and spend your way out of this!”
___
I was thinking of buying one of these for Swaim to use in his videos to keep him company, or at least keep his finger warm. But I just know he’d use it for something foul and unsettling.
I also don’t have the $14.
___
It said “Obama”, though it’s got a little more of a “Theo Huxtable meets the Low Grade Industrial Carpet Monster” thing going on if you ask me.
___
This is astoundingly well crafted. If this puppet told me to do something, I probably would. Hell I’d give you even money that this puppet could beat McCain in an debate.
___
This seems a little tenuous to me, and given the struggling economy and recent rise in teen pregnancy rates, the catchphrase “Spread It Everywhere” seems either wasteful or in poor taste, I can’t tell which.
___
Obama Hearts Hawaiian Pizza T-Shirt
The political t-shirt for people who think political t-shirts are too “political.”
___
I’m no expert on constitutional law, but isn’t it a crime to stick representations of the president into your damp areas to wash out the funk? Or is that protected speech? Should it be?
___
Goes good with the Obama Jam I guess. That would be a pretty fucking inspirational breakfast. Maybe not quite “plant a tree” inspirational, but definitely “take a walk” or “put on pants and at least check the job listings” inspirational.
___
Pretty standard wall sticker here, but I think with a little customization, you could have a lot of fun with this:
___
There’s a whole host of these available, all implying some sort of pan-breed canine support for the Democratic candidate. Does Obama have some position on licking your testicle in public that I don’t know about? Did the liberal media let that slide?
___
This is so rad it should be legal tender.
___
I have no idea. I love how even 15 years after we met, the Internet is still capable of blowing my fucking mind.
This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 20th, 2009 at 8:00 am and is filed under obama. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
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November 1st, 2009 at 5:09 am
[...] Januar 2009 at 21:00 (Kurioses, Menschen) Heute wurde Barack Obama vereidigt. Hinter diesem Link liegt eine Liste der abenteuerlichsten Merchandising-Produkte um seine [...]
October 15th, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Those weird knit Obama dolls are some of the creepiest promos I’ve ever seen. Maybe they were meant as propaganda from his opponents…
July 28th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
ur statements above on del.icio.us today — liked it.. bookmarked it , will be back to check out some more later .. nice article ..
July 12th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
I stumbled upon this by accident when I punched in Obama and fuck in the same sentence
July 1st, 2009 at 10:44 pm
The Barrack Obacca shouldn’t just be legal tender, it should be on the american flag!
http://www.tfc18.com/
July 1st, 2009 at 10:42 pm
Obamanation was penned by Fox News “comedy” news hour. Which was a response to The Daily Show. I find this site funny enough to recommend. Try not to ruin it by pandering to the Fox News crowd.
May 30th, 2009 at 8:54 am
[...] as funny as they are disturbing. But once again, stay classy, Democratic party… Click here to be equally amused and frightened. Share and [...]
April 30th, 2009 at 8:37 pm
[...] Nutty pieces of Obama merchandise Barackula Equine venereal disease Criminal with vulgar facial [...]
March 25th, 2009 at 12:23 pm
Barack Obacca!!!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!
March 13th, 2009 at 6:03 am
This is definately a website for FOX News idiots. Don’t forget to think after you finish listening to all their hateful propaganda.
March 11th, 2009 at 12:13 pm
Next: Obama silverware, Obama plates, Obama butter, Obama toasters…
Dear God.
February 27th, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Obama is fucking insane. He should be impeached.
February 11th, 2009 at 1:34 am
A few observers pointed out that the the clothespin doll was CLEARLY heiling der fuhrer, but thes observers missed the obvious;
The obama hand puppet is clearly a vampire.
So, a nazi vampire for the next four years?
February 10th, 2009 at 6:58 am
Check out a pair of obama stars and stripe socks at ebay UK
February 7th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
[...] sure to check out the other Obama merchandise, actually for sale, like: The Obama Chia Pet - [...]
February 5th, 2009 at 9:15 pm
And here I just bought a hat.
I need that toast now. Obama jam optional. Just something with his face on it.
February 3rd, 2009 at 7:34 pm
I want my obama toast with obama PB&J!!!!!
YES WE CAN!!!!!!!!!
YES WE CAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YES WE CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
aaah!
February 2nd, 2009 at 3:55 pm
…
I think I’ll go buy some Obama Toast now.
February 1st, 2009 at 7:56 pm
Barack Obacca has a very stunned lady in it.
January 29th, 2009 at 9:28 pm
The Barrack Obacca shouldn’t just be legal tender, it should be on the american flag!
January 29th, 2009 at 2:21 am
…the Obama angel… was white?!
January 28th, 2009 at 1:21 am
Add heroin to products branded with Obama’s name. Cops in upstate New York this week broke up a drug ring…
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0123091obama1.html
How fitting!
January 28th, 2009 at 1:07 am
[...] la cara del nuevo presidente que no saben ni como venderlas. Para muestra basta un botón…http://www.cracked.com/blog/18-nutty-pieces-of-obama-merchandise/ Si se sienten un poquito hasta la madre de lo que están haciendo, abran la siguiente página [...]
January 27th, 2009 at 10:40 pm
[...] La mercadotecnia! Más productos en Cracked. Author: Luis Manuel [...]
January 27th, 2009 at 7:16 pm
[...] Americans spent $200 million dollars on Barack Obama merchandise in November alone, and sales of memorabilia are still going strong in January. Everyone wants a souvenir of the new president, from official merchandise to bizarre and sometimes disturbing objects like Barack Obama glow-in-the-dark wine bottle stoppers and Obama soap-on-a-rope. [...]
January 27th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
Sean Payne
I don’t think Obamanation was “written” by Fox News in response to the Daily Show, considering the first time I heard it said aloud was by John Stewart himself, well over a year ago.
Since that day I have heard many, many people slowly put the words together “Obama… nation… Obamination! LOLOL!!” and think that they invented something funny.
Nobody “invented” putting two extremely common words together for the most obvious joke of this election cycle.
January 26th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
[...] Read full story at: cracked.com [...]
January 26th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
this is also pretty nutty: http://lavaworld.com/obama/obamalavalamp.html
January 24th, 2009 at 6:33 am
To add to this article, I walked into a 7-11 and found this today
http://s6.photobucket.com/albums/y219/nickitynick/?action=view¤t=0124090119.jpg
Yeah, it’s Barack Obama water. Yes I bought it,making this the only piece of Obama paraphernalia that I’ve ever shelled out money for. I should probably be slapped
January 24th, 2009 at 1:16 am
Sean Payne
You’re a jackass. One, “Obamanation” was not penned by Fox News. Two, if Fox News penned it, does it all of a sudden become not funny? Three, who the fuck is pandering to the Fox News audience? No one panders to Fox News or its audience. It’s a one-way hate street, regardless of anything based in reality. So shut up. The term is funny, whoever came up with it.
January 23rd, 2009 at 2:18 pm
Hey guys!
Check out this link from Bustedhalo.com on the topic surrounding Obama’s merchandise.
Here is the link: http://www.bustedhalo.com/features/the-obama-megastore/
January 23rd, 2009 at 5:55 am
Obamanation was penned by Fox News “comedy” news hour. Which was a response to The Daily Show. I find this site funny enough to recommend. Try not to ruin it by pandering to the Fox News crowd.
January 22nd, 2009 at 12:20 pm
@troyez
Long, hard, and blue? Ooookaay…..
January 22nd, 2009 at 12:18 am
The Obama dildo pretty much sums up the guy!
January 21st, 2009 at 7:24 pm
I’ve seen some quality tack in my life but I think the paper towel holder tops the charts. Would love to see it in my kitchen mind.
January 21st, 2009 at 12:38 pm
“Obamination” is maybe the funniest word I’ve ever read.
And I totally want an Obama toaster.
January 21st, 2009 at 11:53 am
Cool Obama items! I like the butter and jam!
January 21st, 2009 at 11:16 am
Discover your own family tree and your ancestors spanish origin. Descubre tu árbol genealógico y el origen de tus antepasados en España.
January 21st, 2009 at 9:24 am
[...] you’re still jacked and pumped about the new Administration, here are eighteen items you might want to think about picking up. President Obama took his first act as President yesterday [...]
January 21st, 2009 at 6:30 am
Oh god. The tacos one made me seriously strain my stitches from recent major surgery. The hilarity - and bloodloss!
January 21st, 2009 at 6:09 am
The glow-in-the-dark bottle stopper looks like Golum in a suit.
January 21st, 2009 at 5:06 am
http://www.stupid.com/fun/OBCN.html
Obama - Yes We Can-opener!
January 21st, 2009 at 3:34 am
is that dildo for real ??? if so does it talk and say “yes we can”
January 21st, 2009 at 2:51 am
starting with the taqueria on–i could not stop laughing.
obamanation indeed–even us cynical arabs felt a warm glimmer today.
thanks for the many laughs in tough times, Cracked!
January 21st, 2009 at 2:45 am
thats really funny
Free to meet many sexy girls and rich men at WealthyMeetup . c 0 m , even some celebrities - the sole and absolute black & white people community.
January 21st, 2009 at 2:00 am
show us how it’s done, bucholz. show brockway, at least.
also: “obaminations.”
fucking comedy gold all around.
January 21st, 2009 at 1:57 am
The clothespin figure looks like it’s a member of the Nazi party.
January 21st, 2009 at 1:28 am
technically it’s Barack as Chewbacca, Jimmy
January 21st, 2009 at 12:17 am
they have mugs and even dog clothes and womens tshirts and even clocks with the
“Babies choose DARACK OMAMA” signs on them here as well as baby bibs
http://shop.cafepress.com/design/30678957
January 21st, 2009 at 12:15 am
Funniest thing I have seen around are the bibs and baby and nursing mother clothing that say
“Babies choose DARACK OMAMA”
that look like Barack obama signs
http://clothing.cafepress.com/item/babies-choose-darack-omama-bib/316213967
January 21st, 2009 at 12:07 am
[...] of the funnier pieces of memorabilia for sale [...]
January 21st, 2009 at 12:06 am
Why Men Should Only Marry Rhythmic Gymnasts… LOL!
http://www.tokillfor.com/view_video.php?viewkey=10f86959e5f2fcd90da5&page=1&viewtype=&category=mr
January 20th, 2009 at 11:56 pm
fuck yeah. my painting is up there!
haha. go to http://www.bellasmiles.etsy.com and fucking buy it!!
January 20th, 2009 at 10:41 pm
Chewbacca as Barak made me jizz my pants http://www.thedrunkcanuck.com
January 20th, 2009 at 10:14 pm
omg i had some obama cookies the other day they where pretty yummy
January 20th, 2009 at 10:13 pm
Was I the only one who thought that the wall sticker customization joke was going to involve penises?
Really? Just me? I was the only one? Come on, now!
January 20th, 2009 at 10:04 pm
They missed the Obama caganer: http://www.caganer.com/product_info.php?products_id=289
January 20th, 2009 at 8:09 pm
Actor Tim Robbins, longtime supporter of Obama, left the inauguration sporting a much better hand puppet saying it was the best money he’d spent all day.
I have an uncomfortable suspicion that he and Susan Sarandon hurried back to their hotel room for a quick “threesome” before all the social functions.
This coming from a fan of Robbins and a life-long liberal. Still…ew
January 20th, 2009 at 7:40 pm
when obama is president we’ll all be toast
and in a jam, as well
i wonder if the first handicapped president (franklin delano roosevelt) got this kind of treatment
January 20th, 2009 at 7:17 pm
“If he did that I’m afraid in 2012 we would suddenly find out Greedo invaded us first, change only comes to those with a high enough midichlorian level, and Dick Cheney was really just a whiny bitch who misses his mommy.”
That last one’s true.
January 20th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
OBAMA TACOS!
January 20th, 2009 at 6:19 pm
damn.
the first and last were crazy,
and should be kept seprate.
January 20th, 2009 at 6:17 pm
paulj, you’re a troll. comedians make fun of the people in positions of authority, the fact that we can is one of the great things about america. don’t expect highbrow humor from a comedy website that openly admits to being a rip off of MAD magazine. if you actually expect that you’re retarded. kill yourself, senseless dope.
January 20th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
“If Obama was smart, he would have George Lucas’d his franchise”
If he did that I’m afraid in 2012 we would suddenly find out Greedo invaded us first, change only comes to those with a high enough midichlorian level, and Dick Cheney was really just a whiny bitch who misses his mommy.
January 20th, 2009 at 5:43 pm
[...] enjoy the good times while they’re going in a circular motion. Barack Obacca commands it. Click for more Comments: [...]
January 20th, 2009 at 5:35 pm
Wild_Marker, he is kind of white. When you think about it.
January 20th, 2009 at 5:09 pm
That Obama soap on a rope look more like a caricature of Ron Howard.
January 20th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
John Thomas - oh my god, that would have made it worth watching LOL. Would have been a nice farewell since I now have to turn my television off for the next 4 years.
January 20th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
jealous will be the devil on the day of awakening. but great job putting this together the night before swearing in. It took a few years for bush to be associated with a puppet on a string…or rather toy with a pull string, but i see you have the need to find the most putrid examples of a lack of satire as funny and post them here for other senseless dopes. Great work. thats ok go crack more brain cells and enjoy your blog.
January 20th, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Barack dildo at the top?
January 20th, 2009 at 4:28 pm
Americans never fail in dumbing down something do they
January 20th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
What about this one?
http://www.designtoscano.com/product/more+themes/americana/patriotic+sculpture/obama+dragon+and+mccain+gargoyle+election+year+campaign+collectible+sculpture+-+cl95533.do
Crazy Obama Dragon hahahha!
January 20th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
CHECK OUT THIS CARTOON SERIES ABOUT BARACKS INAUGURATION
January 20th, 2009 at 4:13 pm
“0bama soap on a rope”?!?
Perhaps depicting a black a guy at the end of a rope isn’t the best marketing idea.
January 20th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
Somehow this was missed http://www.obamapaperplate.com
January 20th, 2009 at 3:42 pm
I wonder why they didn’t play Barack the Magic Negro at his inauguration today? That would have been fitting!
RT
http://www.web-privacy.pro.tc
January 20th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
LATE TO THE PARTY.
http://fivedeep.com/2009/01/08/top-5-most-ridiculous-items-celebrating-the-election-of-barack-obama/
January 20th, 2009 at 3:06 pm
I live in Hyde Park, and our Walgreens has many of these merch pieces for sale. In fact, somehow, our Walgreens has become the awkward Merch Tent for Obama, even though he’s playing shows in DC now, and it comes across as really unpatriotic to sidestep the Obama condiments on your way to the Smuckers.
January 20th, 2009 at 2:00 pm
If Obama was smart, he would have George Lucas’d his franchise.
January 20th, 2009 at 1:52 pm
whops lol never mind helps that its the first thing on the page guess i got too excited to see the peanut butter to notice
January 20th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
you forgot the Obama dildo
http://jezebel.com/5075025/
January 20th, 2009 at 1:34 pm
Obama butter?
As in, peanut butter?
They do know that massive outbreaks of salmonella have been contained to PEANUT BUTTER, don’t they?
…. No?
Dammit, Obama!
January 20th, 2009 at 1:32 pm
Am I the only one who notices how many of these things can be used as voodoo dolls?
January 20th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
I’m totally stealing the “Tacos” one for my taqueria, gracias!
January 20th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Anybody noticed how that angel is kinda white?
January 20th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
What Obama pooping in public? I got one of these for my nativity scene at X-mas.
http://www.caganer.com/product_info.php?products_id=289
January 20th, 2009 at 1:07 pm
More nutty merchendise:
Commemorative Figurine
(http://www.collectiblestoday.com/ct/product/prdid-903059001.jsp?cm_ven=Search&cm_cat=Google&cm_pla=Direct&cm_ite=Keyword&External=Y)
Chia Heads
(http://www.drugstore.com/search/search_results.asp?Ntk=All&srchtree=5&Ntt=obama+chia+pet&aid=336064&aparam=obama%20chia%20head&scinit1=obama%20chia%20head)
Action Figure
(http://www.amazon.com/Barack-Obama-6-Action-Figure/dp/B001AF29MG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=toys-and-games&qid=1232474830&sr=1-1)
January 20th, 2009 at 12:59 pm
32 more…I’m partial to the Hennessy 44 myself. They should follow that up with some Obama Fried Chicken and a pack of Newports.
http://www.videosurf.com/blog/32-craziest-items-of-barack-obama-merchandise-478/
January 20th, 2009 at 12:22 pm
The MSM will probably send a hit squad after any comedian with the balls to joke about Obama, but after seeing this, it looks like they won’t have to. That Obama dildo trumps any wisecrack any of us could ever hope to make from now ’til 2012.
January 20th, 2009 at 12:08 pm
While it’s an amusing article, you have to take into account to the fact that the whole article is based around someone going to http://www.etsy.com and typing ‘obama’ into the search box.
January 20th, 2009 at 12:00 pm
What a bunch of stupid shit
January 20th, 2009 at 10:41 am
@The Prowler
It isn’t straight forward enough to be a Sieg Heil. It’s just waving.
January 20th, 2009 at 10:31 am
I love how the clothespin doll is giving the seig heil
Also, I now those weird looking things next to the hand puppets head are supposed to be his arms, but damn- He looks like he’s got some funky ass Gerald Scarfe cartoon kinda shoulders going on like something out of The Wall
January 20th, 2009 at 10:30 am
tweflth!
January 20th, 2009 at 10:26 am
“You can also buy a puzzle of obama”
We did, in November. Oh, you mean an actual, physical PUZZLE, not his mystery agenda to give everything to everyone and save the planet from destruction.
January 20th, 2009 at 10:23 am
Really? hard to believe.i heard this news times from many friends playing on a tall dating site ___Tallmingle.com___,i did not believe, i think that they are know nothing but dating and love.
i am wrong.
January 20th, 2009 at 10:22 am
Funny how the bottle stopper has Obama with his hand over his heart… something I guess he’ll do for wine but not for the National Anthem.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:47 am
i love the taste of obama butter.mmmmmm
January 20th, 2009 at 9:46 am
I can’t believe you left out the Obama coin collection…for $19.95 yoy get two bucks in change….sounds kinda like Obama’s tax plan.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:41 am
OMG, ANTICHRIST!!!! ONLY JESUS CAN APPEAR IN BREAKFAST FOOD!!!
mary has underpass water stains on lockdown.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:03 am
You can also buy a puzzle of obama
January 20th, 2009 at 9:01 am
Aaron, you have just officially declared yourself a complete twat.
January 20th, 2009 at 9:00 am
the obama doll looks a lot like michael jackson to me.
therefore, i want one.
January 20th, 2009 at 8:56 am
I must have Obama soap on a rope….
January 20th, 2009 at 8:53 am
first