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15 Behind the Scenes Photos That Ruin the Movie

I collect pictures of actors in costume between takes, when they're not actually filming anything. I don't know why, it's just an odd little hobby I developed a few years ago (probably to impress chicks or something). I even started a side blog to serve as a home for this hobby, but I almost never update it, because I only believe in wasting my time on stupid nonsense to a point.

But that doesn't mean I don't want to waste your time, so I've collected some of my favorites here, for this column. Some in-costume, on-set photos are funny because they're out of context, some are fascinating in a behind-the-scenes sort of way, and some are neat because seeing them absolutely hurts the film from which they come. All of these are in that third category, because I wanted to not just waste your time, but also maybe ruin your favorite movies. Enjoy!

(Also, just as a heads up, I hope you guys like Star Wars ...)

#15. Greedo from Star Wars (A New Hope)

Greedo was an alien bounty hunter tasked with bringing down the un-bring-downable Han Solo. Even though we never really got to know Greedo, the fact that he had the balls and attitude to intimidate the badass Solo with his brief time on screen speaks volumes.

TheChive

How It Hurts the Movie

Greedo went from being a menacing rival of Han's to being arguably the least creepy member of a 1970s gang of violent sex-partiers.

#14. Don Corleone from The Godfather

The Godfather is one of the greatest movies of all time, and Don Corleone is one of the greatest characters of all time.

I don't know any other context you might want for this. You should probably just see the movie.

juliasegal.tumblr
"Man, he is such an ASSHOLE and -- wait ... he's right behind me, isn't he?"

How It Hurts the Movie

If you concentrate, this can actually improve the movie. Francis Ford Coppola looks like such a lunatic in this picture, he's just staring straight ahead, not interacting with anyone or anything. For the rest of my life, I'm going to assume that in his original vision for The Godfather, Francis Ford Coppola was supposed to be in every shot, playing Don Corleone's stoic, bearded, crazy lumberjack of a conscience, in an Amityville Horror meets Jiminy Cricket sort of way. I like to pretend that they filmed the entire movie with Coppola standing around being visible only to Corleone, like a schlubby, beardy Gazoo, whispering encouragement or advising him when appropriate.

"Don't listen to Tom, Don Corleone, listen to me. Listen to meeee, dum-dum."

In my stupid head, at the last minute, the studio just said, "Look, we tried it, but this whole 'denim-wearing conscience' thing just isn't working. Cut Coppola out of every frame, remove him using the CGI that hasn't been invented yet."

#13. Spider-Man from The Amazing Spider-Man

There's a new Spider-Man movie coming out in a few months, and if you didn't already know that, then frankly I don't care to know you. The Amazing Spider-Man is, allegedly, a darker, grittier and more realistic take on the iconic character.

I'm Not Obsessed!
"Hi! Hiiiiiii!"

How It Hurts the Movie

Hahahaha. Oh man. Look at that fucking picture. Oh, man.

#12. Voldemort from Harry Potter

I still haven't seen any of the Harry Potter movies, but I've learned enough from the trailers and from being alive in the world to know that Voldemort is the bad guy.

HarryPotterForum.com

How It Hurts the Movie

Seems like Voldemort is a perfectly nice guy. Maybe Harry would've realized that if he'd just sat down and talked to Voldemort, like all of the people in this scene. That Voldemort sure seems to have a lot on his mind.

"I just ... I don't know, maybe I'm just tired. I get headaches a lot. Do you think I might need glasses? I'm always -- It's like, in -- Right behind my eyes, is where the pain is. I've also been having some weird dreams lately, if you have a minute to talk about it ..."

#11. Batman and Bane from The Dark Knight Rises

If the previews and brief synopses I've read are any indication, Bane is a terrifying, almost unstoppable agent of destruction, unlike anything Batman has ever faced. He's brilliant, physically impressive and completely deadly.

BatmanNews.com
"Man, look at us. What are we even fighting about?"

How It Hurts the Movie

Because it looks like Bane and Batman finally got approved to adopt that kid they've had their eyes on.

And if that ISN'T an on-set shot and Dark Knight Rises really does end when Batman and Bane realize "You know, we're not so different, you and I," and decide to be friends and move in together or whatever, then I am going to be so pissed.

#10. An Alien from Aliens

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"I can't do it, I just can't, there's -- I'm just so goddamn SICK of fighting space marines. Mom was right. Shoulda stuck with jazz piano. Stupid. Stupid.

How It Hurts the Movie

I'll never be able to watch the Alien movies without sympathizing with the aliens now. Look at how exhausted and, like, heartbroken that alien is. He's like a lonely 12-year-old at a middle school dance, parking himself in the corner. "No, guys, I'm fine, leave me alone, I just don't feel like dancing or talking right now." Dude just needs a hug.

Fuck you, Ripley.

#9. Tim Burton from Edward Scissorhands

Edward Scissorhands was a collaboration between Johnny Depp and Tim Burton before they both got so ... Johnny Deppy and Tim Burtony.

It was awesome.

Aurus.Tumblr

How It Hurts the Movie

It just assures me that there's a better, scarier version of this movie somewhere, a version that stars Tim Burton as the deranged lunatic. Even without makeup, he's the creepiest-looking guy in a picture that features Vincent Price and a guy with scissors for hands.

#8. Leia and C-3PO from Star Wars (Empire Strikes Back)

Another Star Wars entry!

TheChive

How It Hurts the Movie

I guess the movie's fine, but this really steps on the toes of the fan fiction I've been working on.

[More awesome Star Wars photos can be found here, and also later on in this article.]

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