Cracked Columnists

1 New Shirt for 'RoboCop' Fans (and a New Design Contest!)

Do you ever think about the fact that where you live has its own cultural representative? Like how Gotham has Batman, Long Island has Billy Joel, and LA has anyone but an NFL player? We think every city's symbol deserves to get noticed, and since our favorites come from pop culture, we made you these new shirts to celebrate them.

The real-life RoboCop statue isn't ready for the public quite yet, but in our minds, Detroit's top cop is all over every inch of that city already. Between RoboCop's Ronny Cox speeches and deathbot stairs fails, the movie nails a near-future Detroit that becomes its very own character in the movie. So this design from Cracked member Toadlicker combines all of the Dystopian Motor City's technologically reconstructed faces into one design.

It's the next best thing to rewatching the movie, and if you're reading that thinking, "But I've never seen RoboCop before" ... well, not to overreact, but PUT IN THE DVD YOU HAVE 20 SECONDS TO COMPLY.

Our first baby blue version of this shirt (by Cracked member mattographer) sold like Ribwiches. And we're not surprised. Of all the perfectly cromulent perspectives on The Simpsons, no one has their eye on Springfield quite like the KBBL team. So get the official shirt of (briefly) welcoming our new insect overlords in any of these three new color schemes. Your money will not support The Krusty the Clown Show or its most popular segment directly, but wearing this shirt regularly can only embiggen your happiness.

A New Contest for Truth, Justice, and the Historically Badass Way

You might have noticed that both of this week's new shirts were designed by Cracked readers like you. OK, they're not exactly like you. The difference is that we gave those people $500. Good news, though: Your chance to be like them is here. Now. Because our insatiable demand for new designs is back, and our latest contest seeks the best design connecting heroes of history with heroes of comic books.

If that Earth-splittingly rad example doesn't give you the idea, nothing will. So fire up your legally acquired photo editing software, make the best mockup of your concept you can, and post it here. If it's a better idea than Jacques Cousteaquaman, we'll make the shirt, pay you half a grand, and feature you in this space when it launches.

Our Weekly Dose of Shirt Envy

Let's be honest: You look great. Really. You're just nailing your fashion everything right now. Unfortunately, that outfit will end up in a hamper sooner or later, and once you've worn both of our new shirts, that leaves a lot of naked days till your next round of laundry. Good thing we scour the Internet every week for the very best in new T-shirts and assemble the top five in one place for you here. So shop! Wear! Enjoy! And marvel at the way that, unlike a T-shirt, one pair of pants can last a whole carefully managed week.


Available at Insert Coin Clothing


Available at Society6


Available at Glennz Tees


Available at Shirt.Woot


Available at NeatoShop

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