You couldn't escape it. No one could look away, even if they tried. It was all everyone was yammering on about the last few days. Of course, we're talking about - "Holy crap! Will you look at the inside of that penguin's mouth?"
Here are your top ten Cracked shares this week:
The Tsavo Man-Eaters spent nine months skipping through traps like rascally cartoon characters (to eat people, like hard-R horror characters). And it took hunter John Henry Patterson 13 rifle shots just to kill one of them.
"These bizarrely skin-headed lions weren't protecting themselves. They were actively sneaking into camp at night, climbing into tents and dragging the sleeping workers away to their deaths. Those tents were like pistachio shells to the lions, except the nuts inside kept screaming and had families to support, and oh God that's the saddest thing ever."
A penguin's mouth is a conveyor belt of suffering for the live, wriggling prey it consumes. The little fellas just have razor sharp teeth all the way down - teeth in their beaks, teeth on their cheeks, teeth on their tongues. Teeth.
"Sure, a lot of nature's creatures seem harmless, but then they open their mouths..."