5 Spectacularly Crazy Meltdowns by CEOs of Major Companies

#2. The CEO of RyanAir Hates Everyone

Daniel Berehulak/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Michael O'Leary has made a fortune selling really cheap flights across Europe. His company, RyanAir, has built an entire business catering to the kinds of people who value cheap prices more than general safety or not being treated like cattle. It's a perfectly fine arrangement, aside from the fact that O'Leary seems to freaking hate every aspect of it.

Christopher Lee/Getty Images Sport/Getty Images
"It's kind of nice, I suppose ... Its teeth are kind of fucked up."

Without hesitation, O'Leary constantly talks about how cheap he and his company are and how much he openly resents the customers who made him rich in the first place. For instance, he figured out they could cram more people on the plane by removing all but one toilet, then suggested charging people to use it (if you had no change you could presumably just open a window). He also proposed a "fat tax" for overweight passengers on the RyanAir website, but pulled the program after it was deemed too offensive. Just joking! He did take it down, but only because it was decided that actually collecting the money would be too much of a logistical nightmare.

When a story broke that a RyanAir passenger named Suzy McLeod was charged 300 euros just to print out her boarding passes, O'Leary said, "We think Mrs. McLeod should pay 60 euros for being so stupid ... Thank you, Mrs. McLeod, but it was your fuck up." OK, so she should have read the fine print, but Jesus. Even O'Leary must know that those charges exist just to screw unsuspecting patrons.

AP
"Hey, is there a way we can include this photo on the back of tickets?"

Other than the customer abuse, O'Leary constantly insults everyone around him, especially people he relies on. He said pilots are "platoons of goons" and that one of the main reasons the fares are so low is because "our pilots work for nothing."

Alan Crowhurst/Getty Images Sport/Getty Images
But he did make sure to rise to the defense of an "underpaid and underappreciated" employee ... Michael O'Leary.

Oh, and remember the volcanic ash cloud that erupted over Europe a couple of years ago? Remember how every major airline shut down all their flights due to safety concerns over ash choking their engines? O'Leary flew his own test plane and claimed that there was no evidence of ash whatsoever, despite the fact that, according to the British air authorities, he flew nowhere near the cloud.

#1. The Founder of McAfee Antivirus Is a Jungle Spy

Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images

John McAfee is famous for the software that bears his name: McAfee antivirus, aka "HOW DO I UNINSTALL THIS PIECE OF SHIT!!!" antivirus.

Creatas/Creatas/Getty Images
"Hi, I'm Mac ... I- I've been living with McAfee for three years."
"Hi, Mac."

After his memory-hogging software became huge, McAfee did what any of us would do in that situation: He immediately packed up his shit and moved to Belize. Unfortunately, hunkering down in a massive compound in the jungle leads most right-thinking folks to assume you're up to no good. In early 2012, dozens of officers and soldiers raided his jungle property.

Apparently the police thought he was cooking meth. That was absurd, of course. A search of McAfee's compound turned up nothing more than a dozen guns and loads of suspicious-looking lab equipment. Nothing about that says "meth lab" at all. As it turned out, though, the guns were all legal and registered, and the lab was used to manufacture "herbal compounds," so McAfee was back on the jungle streets after a mere 14 hours in custody.

Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images
The scan he had started was still going when he returned.

That all changed when his American expat neighbor turned up dead later that year with a gunshot wound to the head. Due to his notoriously eccentric behavior, McAfee was noted as a suspect. Upon hearing this, he did the sensible thing and ran away, convinced that police were going to murder him.

McAfee made his way to Guatemala but was immediately arrested on charges that he was trying to enter the country illegally. In order to give his lawyer time to draw up appeals, he faked a heart attack in detention. It's apparently around this time that Guatemalan officials decided to just let him go to Miami instead of putting up with his shit any further.

As crazy as that story is, it doesn't compare to McAfee's own claims about what he was doing the whole time on the lam. If you guessed "running a secret operation out of the South American jungle spying on the Belize government," then congratulations, you're a deranged millionaire!

Joe Raedle/Getty Images News/Getty Images
His eyes only see in shades of batshit.

According to a lengthy blog post, McAfee purchased 75 laptops, hacked them with surveillance software, and distributed them to powerful government officials. Then he hired a spy ring of 29 operatives (one of whom apparently became a double agent) and wiretapped everyone's phones. Other than the typical sexual affairs and covered-up murders, McAfee claimed he found evidence of a "Hezbollah trafficking network" that was moving 11 terrorists into America every month, information apparently gleaned by his undercover agents.

Not a single thing we said in the preceding paragraph is a joke.

Now back in the U.S., McAfee has since disregarded his own software (he left the company years before all of this) and cranked out an appropriately insane instructional video on how to uninstall it. Be advised: It involves bath salts.

John McAfee
Seems legit.


Follow Chris on Twitter or visit him at Laffington.com.

Related Reading: Career meltdowns can be a beautiful thing- watch this young newscaster destroy his hope of employment and bask in the joy of schadenfreude. For some more famous meltdowns, click this link and learn how Wesley Snipes strangled the director of Blade 3. Still haven't seen enough people destroying their careers? This list of coaching meltdowns should set you to rights.

Recommended For Your Pleasure

To turn on reply notifications, click here

467 Comments

The Cracked Podcast

Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!