Hollywood may be a soulless machine of sequels, prequels, remakes and ripoffs, but there are some movies that even they won't touch -- some because they are undisputed classics that would only be cheapened by a sequel, and some because there's simply no rational way to continue the story.
Well, it turns out that if they've left those movies alone, it's not for lack of trying. Here are six absolutely real and completely insane proposed sequels that were fortunately never made:
6Se7en 2: Ei8ht
David Fincher's classic serial-killer flick Se7en has a pretty closed ending: Out of the four main characters, one is shot in the head, one is presumably institutionalized and another one now fits in a small box. However, where most people saw a finished story, the executives at New Line Cinema saw an ending filled with sequel potential, so they actually went ahead and developed a sequel centering on the one remaining character ... who is now magic.
In 2002, New Line Cinema grabbed a screenplay by the writer of Ocean's Eleven about a clairvoyant doctor who helps the FBI catch a serial killer and rewrote it as a sequel for Se7en, replacing the protagonist with Morgan Freeman's character from the first film. It's the exact same character, only this time around he has psychic powers (or maybe he had them all along but just didn't mention it in the first one).
"Because eat me, that's why."
This script was at one point sent to David Fincher, who said "it didn't make a lot of sense" and later commented that he would rather have cigarettes put out in his eye than do Ei8ht. So that's probably a no for him. We're pretty sure Brad Pitt would have sided with his pal Fincher ... but you never know about Morgan Freeman.
If he did Dreamcatcher, he'll do anything.
Once you start introducing supernatural elements, what's to stop them from bringing back John Doe as a crazy ghost who haunts Morgan Freeman? Or maybe Gwyneth Paltrow as his clumsy beheaded ghost sidekick. We're 90 percent sure these ideas were at least floated around by the execs before they mercifully abandoned the project.
But, believe it or not, this movie is coming out ... under its original name (Solace) and with Anthony Hopkins playing the psychic doctor.
Because Anthony Hopkins as a doctor who helps FBI agents catch a serial killer is the most original idea ever.