4HD 69830 c Puts Our Night Skies to Shame
In a long list of horrible planets that would do horrible things to you, think of HD 69830 c as an intermission. In the future, when interstellar space travel is possible and every family has its own shuttle, this will almost certainly be the planet teenagers will bring dates to in the hopes of getting laid.
HD 69830 c is exactly the right distance from its star for liquid water to form. That will come in handy for reflecting the vast glowing beam of light that never leaves the sky, like a permanent shooting star.
It's the best real estate in the galaxy, but the local HOA are assholes.
For comparison, our solar system has an asteroid belt, one you probably don't recall seeing in the night sky, because it's so far from Earth and the asteroids are so far apart that it's practically invisible to the naked eye. HD 69830 c has a similar belt that's 10 times closer than and 20 times as massive as ours. That translates to a light so bright that it's 1,000 times more intense than the Milky Way. Looking at this ring would be the equivalent of looking at the very center of a comet, except stretching brilliantly across the entire sky.
And considering the proximity of the asteroid belt to the planet, you can expect some heavy meteor showers every single night, making HD 69830 c the pinnacle of romantic stargazing. We hope it's comforting to know that the peak of future of space exploration may be your great-great-grandchildren having tons of shuttle sex on the planet equivalent of Lookout Point.
"OH, COME ON!"
3PSR B1257+12 b Orbits a Massive Spinning Strobe Light
As strange as all the worlds on this list have been, they share the same characteristic we expect from our planets: They orbit a star. Well, some planets aren't interested in conforming to The Man's expectations. For instance, PSR B1257+12 b is the first of a handful of planets ever discovered orbiting a pulsar.
For anyone unfamiliar, a pulsar is somewhere between a star and a black hole. A star naturally collapses in on itself throughout its life until the buildup of pressure at its core is so great that it explodes into a nova or supernova. What's left at the end of the explosion is the dense core that's only about 10 miles in diameter called a neutron star. If that neutron star continues to spit out radiation and light, then we call it a pulsar. In short, PSR B1257+12 b orbits a giant, radioactive disco ball.
Those of you who live in Las Vegas already sort of know what that feels like.
That means that the only light the planet ever gets is full of deadly radiation, but at least it looks awfully pretty. Pulsars emit beams in pulses because they're rotating, so if you were standing on the planet, it would look like a giant blue strobe in the sky.
This really isn't the planet for epileptic astronauts, and technically it's really not a planet for anyone -- PSR B1257+12 b is bathed in so much radiation that one side of it actually glows blue.
"Excuse me, vacation planner ... we were promised powers?"