You can criticize Hollywood for their often glaring inaccuracies or their attempts to cast dead actors, but the very existence of deleted scenes proves that they are capable of reining things in and making good decisions. Still, you have to wonder why so much money and time was spent filming some scenes that remain utterly baffling, and would have fucked up the rest of the movie had they been left in. Scenes like ...
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10Terminator 3: Rise Of The Machines -- Schwarzenegger the Southern Sergeant
Say what you will about Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, but it grossed over $400 million worldwide, and it knew exactly what kind of movie it was -- a popcorn blockbuster. However, if the following scene had gotten through the edit, it could have turned Rise of the Machines from a pretty average action film into a pretty laughable screwball comedy.
The Deleted Scene:
The scene shows a boardroom full of military personnel and Cyber Research Systems executives watching a promotional video announcing their latest achievements in killer robot technology.
"We calculate its odds of destroying the entire human race at less than 40 percent.
Which makes it much safer than Project Sarandon."
We learn that these new robots will be serving on the frontlines on the battlefield. We also learn why the body design of the Terminator robots are based on Arnold Schwarzenegger. According to the video, Chief Master Sergeant William Candy (Schwarzenegger) has had such an impressive military career that they've decided to model the Terminator robots after him.
"Why does a robot need to be huge? Wouldn't basing it off of a little guy be cheaper?"
But when he opens his mouth, we realize he's not the emotionless, hardcore, aggressively Austrian Arnold we've all come to know and tolerate -- his voice has been overdubbed by that of a giddy, excitable Southern goofball. Grinning like an idiot, Chief Master Sergeant Candy is all "Howdy" and "Shucks," like the biggest, dumbest cousin of Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel. The voice is ridiculous, the dubbing job is jarring and unsettling and the whole concept of the scene is utterly pointless.
"The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs has a muscle fetish and wants an easy lay. It's our job to hook him up."
Obviously the filmmakers need to explain why Terminators don't sound like the Rich Texan from The Simpsons, so one of the executives says he doesn't like the accent. Then the man in the screenshot below turns and, in an aggressively Austrian accent, says, "We can fix it."
Also, he looks sort of like Arnold, too, for some reason.
Get it? The idea is that they liked the body of Arnold, but he had a ridiculous Southern accent, so they replaced it with the voice of some unnaturally deep-voiced scientist! That's exactly the kind of wacky comedy you crave in a movie about time-traveling robot monsters.
Why is he on that treadmill? What new, useful data could that possibly provide robot scientists?
Why It Would Have Ruined the Movie
This scene, trying to explain why all the Terminators look like Arnie, is bewildering for so many reasons, and not just because it was a question that literally no one was ever asking at any time. We've accepted the fact that Terminators have to be naked when they go back in time because clothes can't time travel, or whatever, we're already on board with your logic at its most bullshit-tastic; you don't need to explain anything to us.
Sure. The robots have to be naked and covered in skin to travel through time. That's perfectly logical.
But since you did, you've only raised more questions. Why would humans have been developing the Terminators when, in The Terminator, Kyle Reese said that it was the robots who actually designed and built them as a way to infiltrate the humans? Why, about 20 years after crushing the humans, would Skynet honor the inferior humans' choice of face when it came time to build the Terminators? Are we assuming the deep-voiced man with the Austrian accent recorded his voice for the project before Skynet became self-aware and gunned him down?
We're going to go with "no."
It took a decent stretch of the imagination to enjoy the believability of Rise of the Machines in parts, but something tells us this scene would have gone a little too far into the absurd.