One of our favorite animals we ever featured here was that lizard that sprays blood from its own eyes when threatened. As awesome as it is, though, it's actually not the grossest defense mechanism in nature.
8The Turkey Vulture's Twice-Rotten Peace Offering
Vomiting on a predator is a time-honored tradition in the Animal Kingdom, but the turkey vulture has honed this simple skill into a veritable art form. Already, there are few animals willing to kill and eat a turkey vulture -- presumably because these birds eat rotting carrion, shellfish that washed up on shore and died days earlier, and fecal matter from other animals. Oh, and they clean themselves with their own piss. But that's not the grossest part.
On the rare instances when the turkey vulture does run into something that would like to eat it (something that is literally starving to death, we'd imagine), it's got a great plan for how to get away.
Why doesn't it just fly away? Well, if the vulture has just eaten, it has gorged itself on so much spoiled meat that it's too heavy to take off. So, the turkey vulture, too fat to fly, vomits everything in its stomach up in front of the predator as a peace offering. This isn't just your run-of-the-mill disgusting vomit, either. This is vomit that is made from all the horrible odds and ends other animals have left behind; this is rotting maggot-infested shit-covered vomit.
"Like yours is any nicer."
And once the turkey vulture has emptied out the contents of its vile gut, it waddles its fat ass away while the predator snarfs down the big steaming pile of puke. Good job, turkey vulture; crisis averted. This is why you have no friends.
Via Gildart Photo
And yet, there is one bird that does puke better ...