5 Golf Courses That Can Kill You

#2. Prisonview Golf Course

Prisonview Golf Course sits within view of a maximum security prison (surprise!). Located in Angola, Louisiana, the golf course is open to the public, and has been since 2004. However, in addition to greens fees, the player must also consent to a background check and also the possibility of a body check or an inspection of your car. (Also, the possibility of a shanking is sort of always lingering.)

"No major crimes, no DUIs ... OK. You and your daughter can play pitch n' putt now."

One of the interesting things about Prisonview is that it's not a golf course that is specifically for prisoners, who are, in fact, only allowed on the course to work on it. It was originally built to entice employees to stay at the prison during weekends because this prison is so bad that employees need incentive to be there beyond the fact that they are already getting paid to do so. Nowadays, it's open to employees and any non-prisoner (who doesn't mind a full-body search directly before they tee off).

A ranch house! That'll be good for hiding from rape-happy prison rioters.

Another interesting thing is that, while California's Pebble Beach course has been called "the No. 1 course in America," Prisonview has been called the "bloodiest [prison] in the United States." Understandably, games have been suspended on several occasions due to riots and other emergencies, but you really should expect that when you show up at a place called Prisonview.

"Unprofessionalism? Here at Prisonview? Why I never!"

Just to recap: Someone built a golf course in the middle of one of the most dangerous prisons in America, then told the incredibly violent prisoners they were for forbidden from ever actually using the course, and then they encouraged a bunch of wealthy, entitled, golf-loving thrill-seekers to use the course whenever they wanted. That's like opening up a restaurant in the middle of a hungry lion cage, or like opening a golf course in the middle of a fucking prison.

They also host rodeos there.

#1. Skukuza Golf Course

Plenty of golf courses have to deal with some occasionally troubling wildlife, depending on their location. Plenty of courses are overrun by deer and birds and, in both Florida and South Carolina, alligator attacks are not that uncommon at all. Patrons just accept it as a necessary risk that they combat as best as they can.

"There, this should do it. Dangerous animals hate signs."

Well this is the African version, amped up to 11. Right next to famed Kruger National Park, this South African course has warnings posted all over the park. They're like the alligator warning signs, except impossibly more terror-inducing. Their signs read like they were written by someone in mid-chase: "Lions, elephants, leopards, rhinos and buffaloes, Do not run away! ... If you run, the animal will believe that it has gained the advantage and it will be more likely to give chase." The back of the sign probably reads "Shit shit shit shit shit."

"Well I just need to line up my shot and- JESUS CHRIST!"

Built in 1972 as an addition to the National Park, Skukuza has a pretty substantial body count under its belt. Hippos and leopards have both taken lives and, while injuries to golfers by the animals are rare, the staff has been attacked a ton of times. And that's not to mention the numerous attacks to other animals that sometimes happen even on the fairway.

Ah , this course is so beautif- OH MY GOD!

This course attracts golfers because of its beauty and its unique wildlife. Players simply accept the fact that, at any minute, they might have to ditch their game and sprint away from a leopard or hippo, because that's the kind of life you have to live when you decide to be a complete moron. You get what you deserve when you opt to play on the golf course that un-ironically named one of their lakes "Lake Panic."

Well why would they name it th- WHAT THE FUCK?!?

Signs are posted all around Lake Panic warning golfers of the the crocodiles and hippos that hang around. Yes, hippos are probably the most dangerous animal on the course, and the staff warns that "If you're out here and [hippos] attack you, you have no chance. There's no way to survive them. Their teeth are huge." One reviewer even notes that hippos are notorious for having no fear of humans, "particularly golfers." They're not afraid of anyone, but specifically less afraid of golfers, here at the Animal Monster Death Golf Zoo. The reviewer goes on to point out that the course itself isn't even that great as far as golf courses go. What it lacks in challenging holes it more than makes up for in killing you.

Have Fun!

For more bizarreness in sports, check out 6 Insane Sports Stories That Will Make You Believe In Curses and The 10 Most Insane "Sports" in the World.

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