How to Compose a 'Tweet' [COMIC]
Basic Instructions is a twice weekly updating web comic that offers absurd advice on how to live your life. Some of those updates will be happening here on Cracked.
Previously Scott has taught us How to Serve Slightly Chilled Revenge and How to Lose at Scrabble With Dignity.
I actually laughed out loud while reading this. Good job.
ReplyEasily the funniest Basic Instructions I've seen so far.
ReplyThe resulting tweet is brilliant
ReplyThis one is funny purely because he changed the first panel.
Reply"Would it help if I add LOL?"
Reply"Does it ever?"
perfect.
Bahahaha. First time I got more than a chuckle from these. Meyer, you are improving. Well done.
ReplyYay, an actually funny one.
ReplyThese used to be very boring and funny as a funeral, but I have noticed they seem to be getting better somehow. Or maybe my standards are just lowering. Who knows, but interesting quote.
ReplyThis actually would work best as two tweets... There's the set up, and then BAM punchline right in your face.
ReplyAgreed. It was most funny during the original slide.
Make this the second one of these I've laughed at. More, please?
ReplyOh god, that fourth panel made me laugh so hard.
ReplyTHIS SUCKS I DIDNT EVEN LAUGH. DONT EVER WASTE MY TIME WITH THESE COMICS AGAIN. I PAID SO MUCH MONEY TO GET ACCESS TO THIS SITE AND NOW I GET THIS s**tTY COMIC. SO MUCH MONEY AND SO MUCH TIME LOST. f**k. I AM TWELVE YEARS OLD AND DONT KNOW WHAT GRATITUDE IS. f**k.
Reply Hide All See All 18 Repliesf**k indeed.
Okay one the site is free, two your twelve....the hell are you doing on cracked? And again your twelve...you have plenty of time so quit your b***hin'. Also what the hell does gradtitude have to do with anything in this situation?
Bad satire is bad.
troll.
@Hobbesthetiger: you just went full retard
I don't know what's worse, the s**tty trolling, or the fact that Hobbes seems to have fallen for it
haha hobbes you idiot
Hobbes, this site is only free if you live within the continental united states, anyone outside the USA has to pay an annual subscription. Why do you think there are so few non English speakers among the comments?
Haha, oh Hobbes, you malformed sack of crap.
I think Monat was being sarcastic but to be on the safe side:
s**t f**k s**t f**k f**k DICK f**k b***h s**t f*g GAY b***h f**k s**t f**k. :D
Estimados señores de Cracked. Yo no sabía que había que pagar por leer los articulos, so to whom do i send my money?
Hobbes, go back to Calvin. He misses you.
And Nemmo, I'll be waiting for the cheque, please.
dont feed the trolls.
@morepark
Don't try to be more trolly please. :P
Ha! you just fell for it. You must not feed the trolls remember?
Uh, is called sarcasm, not trolling :(
I had to click the comments to see who got more s**t, Unfunny Monaskarte or Hobbes the retarded tiger.
I HAVE CAPS LOCK TOO
composing tweets is even simpler than you could possibly imagine:
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies1. type some words
2. click "send"
I'm fairly certain you missed the point.
Nope, that's all there is to it.
lol
I got to admit, the first 3 panels are kinda funny. Though this comic still sucks the rest of the time.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesI don't get it. Even when you like it, you don't?
Is it some kind of a faux pas to admit you like them? Like saying you enjoy algebra and all the cool kids will start making fun of you for it?
Yeah something like that. I think it's the same with Cody's articles.
I used to feel that way when I said I liked Tom Hanks as an actor.
Not anymore.
One of your finest, my man.
ReplyNow that I've complimented you, allow me to be a nerdy a-hole:
Fewer, not less.
Thank you.
wordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswords
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesYou seem to be in desperate need of swords (or word-swords). Want some help with that?
I'm not sure, but that might be more than 140 characters...
Yes, I can't read either. Let's hang out, we can watch some cartoons together.
so I got "or", "sword" and "word", do plurals counts as different words? Okay, this word search puzzle is just poorly executed.
You could fit it into a tweet with a compression scheme. Just say
("words*10" + "\n")*39
That's ten "words" per line, 39 lines. You even have space left to tell people to enter it into the python interpreter to get original message.
I actually just gzip'd you message. It can now be tweeted as a binary file:
1F8B08087E3D704D0003776F7264732E747874002BCF2F4A292E2785502049F5A896512DA3A46B58C6A19D532AA85465AB800470D4883C6060000
lol at Basic Instructions talking about s**t that goes on for far too long. Oh the irony.
ReplyA mildly amusing yet mostly accurate BI hater, hey! that one is actually new!
At least you say what you don't like instead of going, "STOP WITH THESE COMICS!"
These are usually below average but this one was decent.
ReplyI had to fight a powerful compulsion to figure out how to fit this idea into a tweet. I failed:
ReplyPaper towel dispensers must be sufficiently advanced technology since I gotta wave my hands like a magician to make them work #ArthurCClarke
Exact fit - well done!
Alternatively you could be Charlie Sheen and discuss tigerblood
Reply#tigerblood