5Her Stress During Pregnancy Can Change Your Behavior
Anyone who has taken a long family road trip knows that our parents' stress is highly contagious, but you may not realize that it's also made you frail and stupid. Scientists have now discovered that stress during pregnancy is connected to allergies, autism, slow development and learning difficulties in infants.
WARNING: Contents under pressure. Do not agitate.
Your mom doesn't have to be an air traffic controller or in charge of de-escalating a nuclear standoff. It turns out that common relationship problems and financial issues somehow boost the level of antibodies associated with asthma and allergies in an unborn baby. These are the antibodies that overreact like fans at an ICP concert if you make contact with dust, pollen or dogs. If you have too many, you have to live in a plastic bubble in order to breathe.
This story gets much worse if the stress your mother dealt with was associated with home renovation. Like, lying awake at night agonizing over whether to paint the baby's room pink or blue. It turns out that chemicals released during stress form a horrible, horrible cocktail if they're combined with certain chemicals in glues, paints and plastics. For example, if you're a guy and your mother got too stressed-out while inhaling paint fumes, your balls may never drop. And that's just one of the many awful and emasculating conditions you may have to deal with.
"KICK THEM, YOU COWARD! KICK THEM UNTIL THEY FALL!
Rest assured, though, she only stressed because she loved you. And if she'd known all this back then, being stressed would have only made her more stressed. Depending on your perspective, scientific enlightenment has either doomed the next generation or made them way more likely to be born with a contact high.
4Mom's Diet Determines What You'll Like to Eat
When you're a kid, half of the appeal of adulthood is the freedom of deciding what you want to eat, without Mom's meddling. We here at Cracked enjoy an ice cream sandwich for breakfast every single morning. The bad news is, scientists have discovered that even if you live thousands of miles away from your mother, she's still controlling your diet from the past.
Also, she's still pissed that you didn't go to med school.
A mother's choice of comfort food during pregnancy has a profound impact on what her children spend the rest of their lives eating, or in some cases, stuffing their fat, greasy-jowled faces with. Scientists have discovered that the flavors in a pregnant mother's diet actually affect the structure of a fetus's brain.
To test their hypothesis, researchers plied some pregnant mothers with carrot juice, carrots long having been recognized as baby kryptonite. Astonishingly, the babies whose moms drank the carrot juice showed a preference for carrot-flavored cereal, rather than just smearing it all over themselves and throwing it onto the walls. It's kind of terrifying to think that those cheeseburgers you ate while pregnant may have doomed your child to a life of good old American obesity.
If only she'd chosen a healthier addiction. Like nicotine.
The implications go well beyond simply determining your dietary preferences. Researchers have found that alcohol exposure during fetal development may be linked directly to teenage binge drinking. Although the research to prove this connection has been performed only on rats, because trying to turn babies into alcoholics by getting their pregnant moms smashed is seen to have undesirable ethical ramifications, even in the name of science.