How to Brace Yourself for Bad News [COMIC]
Basic Instructions is a twice weekly updating web comic that offers absurd advice on how to live your life. Some of those updates will be happening here on Cracked.
Previously Scott has taught us How To Retroactively Ruin a Joke and How to Argue Like and American.
A lot of these comics are actually really good.
ReplyI enjoy the comments just as much as the comic. Every time I read one I don't like I just think "Oh well, the comments about it / random s**t" will be funny.
ReplySeriously, I love these. I've loved most of them. I really don't understand people who are so self-important that they need to post to everything they don't like (or don't get) "this sucks". These posts are regularly 100% funnier than anything that has ever been on the cartoons page of any newspaper... Stop hating, folks. If you don't like it, don't read it.
Reply Hide All See All 5 RepliesAgreed.
f**k you c**tface I hate you, you c**k smoking f**kdick
^^
Subtlety is his middle name.
No Bishielurfer, the stuff he just typed is his middle name.
newspaper cartoons, talk about a high bar.
Really liked the third panel. The cringing posture is beautiful.
ReplyI agree.
Hah-haaaaaaaa! This one was funny. I understood it. And I was fired from my last job in this manner (only less hilarious) which made the end funny and depressing at the same time.
ReplyI've been skipping these for a few months, because I hated them, but thought I'd check this one out...
ReplyHILARIOUS.
Maybe I'll start reading them.
same here
WHY ARE THESE NOT FUNNY? THEY MAKE ME SAD.
ReplyHahahahah
ReplyIf only my pals could read english.
.
.
.
If only my pals could read at all.
Awesome.
Excellent.
ReplyWhoa whoa whoa. All the complainers must be busy elsewhere then?
ReplyComic's all right.
Most have just stopped reading this column. Check out the number of views these get. Sad.
*in the voice of Lisa Simpson* ....santa..?
9 out of 10 of Meyers comics are brilliant, especially lately. Keep em coming please.
ReplyBest one yet of these by far.
ReplyI strongly recommend you __ Ag'ele'ssbb'w.℃oM for single girls, men to find real love... My friends found true love there.. I hope that will happen to me .
ReplyO.K. After a bit of encouragement from a columnist here i decided to give it a shot. Oh happyzi, you don't really know how loved you are, if only you will return it, I look at all your posts with such a heated passion that with out it I would inevitably shrivel up and die, and the blood will be on your hands. The way you talk, your stunningly amazing mug is all I can think about. I love you so much and your cold robotic feelings need to be broken free in order for you to experience my love.
-Love,
Duelingrockets
Happyzi
I'm sorry to inform you but you're not going to find happiness here. Sure, they promise happiness and yes, it occasionally even leaks out late at night when someone's been eating to much drunken Taco Bell. But it's not going to happen to you. You're the software, virtual version of Johnny 5 and this is a software, virtual version of comedy. You're consistent, reliable, and ordered. Cracked simply can't exist in a world of consistency, reliability, and orderliness. No comedy can.
Perhaps you should give AOLradio or WoW chat & forum calls? I'm sure someone there will be much more receptive to your desperate need for love and warmth.
I LOL'd.
ReplyPretty damn good.
ReplyMore comics like this one, fewer bulls**t "lists R funny" recycled factoids.
ReplyI like BI. I've always thought they were clever
ReplyHey, this one is actually funny. Awesome.
ReplyArgue Like and American?
Reply Hide All See All 3 Replies:x
Type like you've never set foot in America?
Well, typing like most of us would be something like "typ eliek uve nevr set foot na Merica", sadly.
Get off the internets, you disgusting piece of zit.
Does Scott really take money from a man with a mullet?
ReplyDirty, filthy, mullet-man money.
You didn't know this? His best friends wife also looks a lot like his best friend...only female.