Shocking stat of the day: Despite the invention of airbags, seatbelts, antilock brakes and god knows how many other improvements meant to keep us safe, traffic deaths aren't much lower than before all that was invented.
How is that even possible? Well, if you've spent five minutes on the roads today, you know why: People can't drive worth a shit. Here are some scientific reasons that guy in the next lane is about to run you into a guardrail.
6He Just Finished Playing a Racing Video Game
Unless you're a professional gamer, a mercenary for hire or you just take lots of acid and often find yourself chasing six-foot tall mushrooms through the streets, there really aren't that many video game skills that translate into something practical in the real world.
At first blush, racing games seem to be an exception to that rule. We all have to drive, right? And not just anyone can navigate a Lamborghini Murcielaga through Las Vegas at 185 miles-per-hour and only slaughter, like, two pedestrians. Surely the dexterity and reflexes required to brake, boost and drift all at the same time in Burnout: Paradise translate to some sweet fucking chops behind the wheel of an actual car, right?
Not the same as real life.
Incredibly, video games have failed to improve our lives again.
A recent study found that men who simply play racing games and then get behind the wheel of a real car tend to take more risks, display more aggression toward other motorists and generally drive like they're trying to cross some imaginary finish line before everyone else. Or, like the other cars are cheating by teleporting right behind him even when he knew he was way ahead, goddamnit.
Curiously, this effect can be blunted if you simply avoid having a penis. Studies showed women can play Gran Turismo for eight hours straight, drive home in the heaviest rush-hour traffic ever and never once scream, "Get that piece of shit out of my way you festering communist anal wart."