6 New Weapons That You Literally Cannot Hide From

#3. Sniper Bombs

Apparently it's no longer okay to just flatten a whole city because there might be a few soldiers holed up there. So, you're a savvy terrorist group, and you've set your base up in a building nestled between an orphanage and a kitten factory.

Unfortunately for you, the Air Force has been testing what are called "Focused Lethality Munitions," or sniper bombs. They are being designed to drop out of bombers, fighter aircraft or even drones, use GPS to guide them to their target, and then kill everyone inside the building without so much as rattling the windows of nearby structures. No word on whether a pleasant female voice announces "you have arrived at your destination" before blowing everything to hell.

The sniper bomb's warhead consists of a "multiphase-blast explosive fill" made of DIME (Dense Inert Metal Explosive). The number of letters it takes just to name the blow-uppy parts is testament to how scary this thing is. Instead of a normal explosive wrapped in a crunchy shell of steel, it is held together by a carbon composite that murders everything in the room without harming the structure of the building.

DIME in action.

The next week, the landlord can just rent that shit to somebody else.

#2. Next-Generation Bunker-Busters

Eventually, you are going to just give up on the surface world, because it is full of robots and bullets that pilot themselves, and seriously, fuck that. Really, the only safe place is in some kind of supervillain underground facility or cave system. That works in the comics, right?

Before you retire to your subterranean hideout, you should know about the new nuclear bunker busters and BLU-118/B thermobaric bunker busters, both of which ensure you'll be burning your feet on the liquid hot mantle of the earth before you are safely out of their reach.

It really doesn't matter which is which; you are screwed either way.

Some of you stopped when you read the word "nuclear" up there. That's World War III stuff, right? We're not still doing that, are we?

Well, it's a nuke, but one designed to explode underground, so no risk of mushroom clouds carrying radiation all over the landscape. The tips of the bombs are made with tungsten, and that combined with the speed at which the bomb hits the ground causes "liquefaction" to occur when it hits concrete. So when you drop it from really high, the bomb crashes straight through the ground like Wile E. Coyote after he falls off a cliff. Unlike Wile E. Coyote, it delivers a nuclear apocalypse direct to your subterranean living quarters.

The BLU-118/B is just as terrifying. It is "thermobaric," which means it releases an explosive gas into the air before it blows up. This creates not just a mere localized explosion, but a traveling wave of fiery death that is "designed to tunnel through convoluted caves and pulverize anyone hiding as deep as 1,100 feet inside, and then incinerate whatever remains."

If that sounds like the most horrifying thing that can come roaring down your hallway, well, get a load of...

#1. Kinetic Fireball Incendiaries

If someone told you that "rocket powered flaming rubber balls" were on the enemy's list of shit they were going to try and kill you with, you might be in danger of throwing out your back from all the maniacal laughter that would ensue. Kinetic Fireball Incendiaries are just that, though, and while the concept sounds retarded, the reality is about as close as the real world will ever get to being directed by Roland Emmerich.

"I'm envisioning FIRE!"

The idea is to launch lots of hollow balls of rubberized rocket fuel with a hole in one side, and light them on fire.. They become rocket-powered fireballs that bounce around inside the building, killing everything near them in the most cartoonish yet horrifying way possible.

We believe it works something like this:


The thing is, the flaming balls don't actually have to hit you. The concept works something like a martini shaker; the reason the shaker cools your delicious drink faster than simply mixing in ice cubes is because they move around the liquid inside, cooling a higher volume in a much shorter time. With the KFI, you get essentially the same thing, except the ice cubes are flaming balls that raise the ambient air temperature to over 1000 degrees in seconds, not to mention knocking down doors and spreading the same horror throughout the building.

"Shaken, not erupting with the fury of one thousand angry suns."

But this is some weird-ass DARPA project that will probably never move beyond the inventor's brain, right? Nope, published documents show that they have been tested, successfully. Is there a word for the emotion you feel when something is really really cool and really really horrible at the same time? If not, we need to invent it soon.

You can find more from David at Daily Chowder and Associated Content

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For more insane weapons that have been constructed, check out 7 WTF Military Weapons You Won't Believe They Actually Built. Or find out how you can turn your average toy into a lethal weapon, in 7 Hacks That Turn Everyday Objects into Deadly Weapons.

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