Cracked usually runs articles about things you used to watch when you were a kid and how, upon further examination, they are way more retarded than you remember. We secretly hate our younger selves for being such embarrassing dumb asses, and pointing out how stupid the Smurph language is helps us cope with the anger.
So we were all ready to point out how far-fetched Cobra Commander's plots for world domination were, but the more we remembered, the more we were reminded of the news.
5The Wrong Stuff
In one of their many attempts to use television for evil, Cobra Commander uses stolen satellites and an inexplicable headquarters in the Himalayas to take over the airwaves, broadcasting Cobra TV to turn public opinion against G.I. Joe and in favor of their snake-themed one world government.
Programming includes classic movies with the endings changed to reflect a more anarchistic world view, a version of the Smurfs that was even more socialist than the original, and while we didn't actually see the Right-Wing Australian punditry of The Zartan Factor, we're pretty sure it was in there somewhere.
Why It Might've Worked:
For an organization that once tried to conquer the world through mind-control chewing gum, this is actually not a bad plan. Sure, their shows are bad and the re-cut movie endings are stupid, but if there's anything we've learned from the fact that Two and a Half Men is the highest rated comedy on television, it's that people will watch anything, especially if it's stupid. Seriously, just try getting through one of Jimmy Fallon's monologues without wishing you were being indoctrinated into the ranks of the Televipers instead.