5 Ways 'Common Sense' Lies To You Everyday
Albert Einstein said common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by the age of 18. It is also a result of some pervasive and extremely stupid logical fallacies that have become embedded in the human brain over generations, for one reason or another. These malfunctioning thoughts--several of which you've had already today--are a major cause of everything that's wrong with the world.
#5.
The Historian's Fallacy
You'll Hear it As:
"Hey I heard Lisa tried to stab you! You should have known that ho was crazy!"
How It Screws Us:
Remember that time you decided to jump off your roof and do a back flip into your little brother's kiddie pool? Remember how all your friends thought it was a great idea and it was going to be so cool? And do you remember when you regained consciousness three months later in the hospital, how suddenly they all laughed at you and said you should have known better? Congratulations, you were bitch-slapped by the Historian's Fallacy.
The problem is, there is something about our brains that just won't let us put ourselves in the other guy's shoes. We're the fat guy on the couch screaming about how LeBron James "choked" because he took that bad shot instead of driving the lane. We're all convinced that, had we been in the same situation, we would have made the right decision; the Titanic wouldn't have sank, the stock market wouldn't have crashed and the PlayStation 3 wouldn't have been priced at $599.
The moment we see their mistake in hindsight, we tell ourselves what morons they must have been. The problem, of course, is that when your reaction is to shake your head, laugh and call them dumbasses, it keeps you from learning from their mistakes.
It Gets Worse...
To see this happening on a grand scale, just open a history book, or watch the news. George Santayana famously warned in 1905 that, "those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it" and people have spent the last hundred years ignoring him. It's not so much that we don't remember the past, it's that here in the future everything they did looks retarded.
What were they thinking?
People don't realize that given the exact same set of circumstances and foreknowledge as Hitler in 1941, we would have invaded Russia, too. If we had been Sylvester Stallone in 1985, we would also have made Over The Top and married Brigitte Nielsen.
#4.
The Nirvana Fallacy
You'll Hear it As:
"You gave that homeless guy a sandwich? Ha! Like that's really going to fix poverty!"
How It Screws Us:
The Nirvana Fallacy is when you dismiss anything in the real world because you compare it to an unrealistic, perfect alternative, by which it pales in comparison. It wouldn't be a problem, except it keeps us from getting anything done.
"We were GOING to write an album, but...Nevermind." The Nirvana Fallacy.
For instance, procrastination can happen for a lot of reasons--you drank too much the night before, or you're feeling uninspired, or it's your first time doing gay porn and you're having second thoughts--but one of the most common reasons we procrastinate is fear that the end result won't live up to the "perfect" idea in our heads. Think about the writer friend of yours who has never actually written anything, because they're "waiting for the right idea" for a book to come along.
This is why people wind up living in their parents' basement--waiting for the perfect job, the perfect girl, the perfect friendship--before committing to anything.
If you're not full of that kind of self-doubt, don't worry, there are plenty of assholes willing to supply it for you. Any incremental improvement on someone else's part is mocked as some kind of deluded hypocrisy, because anything short of perfect is not worth doing, so you might as well do nothing, like them. "Ha! You're drinking a Diet Coke with your hamburger? Like that's really going to make a difference!"
"A wedding dress. Right. Like THAT will attract a guy. You're pathetic."
It Gets Worse...
Politicians use this to attack any idea they don't like. "Sure, your plan is helping millions of families in poverty. But I found examples of people abusing it! So we might as well scrap the whole system!"
Or, you'll hear radical political types on the Internet say, "I'm not voting for any of those guys! They're no better than Bush! They're all corrupt agents of the NWO! I'm staying home until you can show me a perfect, incorruptible, intelligent politician who believes the exact same things I do!"
#3.
The Appeal to Probability
You'll Hear it As:
"Sure I bought a lottery ticket! Somebody has to win, might as well be me!"
Or
"They found another case of bird flu in China! If I see a bird, I'm gonna kill its ass before it can make me sick!"
How It Screws Us:
Our brains are stupid when it comes to calculating probability. As a result, we all have this fuzzy idea that if something can happen, it probably will. And we think this, while having no idea what "probably" even means.
This is why millions of high school kids think they're going play pro sports when they grow up, even though there are only enough available jobs for a tiny fraction of them. When the news says an asteroid may hit the Earth in the next 10 million years, people will watch the skies suddenly sure that an asteroid will hit that day.
And an asteroid that thinks it'll play pro sports is just the apotheosis of delusional.
The Appeal To Probability is the fallacy behind one of the most cherished tenants of common sense: Murphy's Law. For those of you who aren't familiar with comical posters from the 70s, Murphy's Law states that if something bad can happen, it will happen. And while that attitude may leave you depressed and irritable, believing the opposite can leave you having to sell a kidney to pay the rent.
It Gets Worse...
The Appeal To Probability might be one of the most ingenious ways people convince other people to give them money. The entire gambling industry runs on it. Well, that and mountains of cocaine. Any time we buy a lottery ticket, bet on a horse or enter into a financial agreement with the deposed president of Nigeria, we're being bent over by the Appeal to Probability.
Hollywood doesn't help us on this one, since every single movie is about the one-in-a-million shot going through. Nobody wants to hear about the underdog who lost the big game 49-0. So after hearing that same story several hundred times, we somehow come away with an unspoken belief that the unlikely underdog always wins. We don't stop to ask why, if that really happens, they are still called the unlikely underdog?
#1 is genius. I find myself guilty of it now and then, and intend to snap out of it.
Reply#4: In other words, perfect is the enemy of better.
ReplyThe problem isn't that people don't learn from the past - they do. The problem is, WHAT do they learn? History may be an open book, but like every other open book, it's interpretable by him wot reads it. If you want to learn from history that slavery is wrong, that minorities deserve better, and that white culture should try to be more humble, then that's what you'll learn. If, on the other hand, you want to learn that stupid libruls have ruined everything by giving THOSE people rights - like they were actually human beings - then you'll learn that, too. Some people learn that WWII had the right conclusion, but there are others convinced BY THE HISTORY that it was an enormous injustice that kept That Smart Guy from transforming the world into A Righteous Place. History is what the perceiver thinks it is, thus the idea that we must learn from it is a double-edged sword. What's important is how we learn, and for that a person needs guidance. The linchpin isn't the history, it's the teacher.
ReplySomeone obviously didnt get what you were saying, but I did. Kuddos. Its all about how you percieve the information.
"perfect, incorruptible, intelligent politician who believes the exact same things I do!"
ReplyThat's your problem. A perfect, incorruptible, intelligent politician does not believe the exact same things you do!
You just won politics.
Oh and by the way....diet cokes are actually proven to make people gain weight instead of lose it....sorry but regardless of the calorie count, I don't trust anything that says its sugar and/or calorie free but still tastes as sweet as heck. I would bet my last dollar that in a few years or decades (just like what happened with cigarettes) that they'll find something really wrong with artificial sweeteners and what it does to the body overtime.
ReplyThey already are being found. Also, diet coke has a s**t load of salt in it which is arguably as bad for you as sugar in large amounts. I quite like the stuff, but like anything it need to be in moderation
I completely agree with the Nirvana Fallacy. Unfortunately I'm a procrastinator with the same problem. Thankfully, unlike a lot of others like me, I've realized the problem and am working on methods to cure or at least diminish my perfectionist personality.
ReplyAs opposed to disagreeing with a logical fallacy?
No. 1 is so me it's frightening
Replythis article must be about someone else.
Reply#2 explains religion, praying, and televangelists
ReplyAnd #4 explains why people don't beleave in God because he dosn't grant there every wish.
In regards to number one don't forget politicians who want to ban porn yet admit to having it on their own computer.
ReplyHey, maybe that's for "research"! You can't oppose to something you haven't experienced! Lmao
Interesting that one says, "If you don't try something, you're doing nothing." and the other "Trying to do something *really* special is a one in a million shot, so you might as well give up."
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesI know writing the great American Novel isn't exactly buying a lottery ticket. But the odds can't be much higher. And if no one played the lottery no one could win it so...
Exactly. This leads into thinking that "every effort is effort enough" and leads to beliefs that "this is as far as I can go" and "I should be realistic".
Alright. It's fine if you lose 10 final matches and never become as famous as . But who says that you tried enough before you give up is you. Not me, not BrandonT. And since we don't really know which things are 100% sure or 0% sure unless we pick far fetched examples which are mutually agreed that are likely/unlikely to happen (like a soda-drinking vampire dances polka in your closet), there is no excuse NOT to try get a new job, move in a new country, flirt with the pretty girl that your friends say you have no chance with, found a start-up company.
Hell, failing is part of the life, like winning. Do you like to fail or fail successfully? Because chances are even when you fail to approach the girl, make business or read a book you always learn something. Pessimists will say "yeah, I learned that girls hate me" or "I learned that I'm dumb and cannot read" and stuff like that and give up instead of changing their methods of approach. Better to learn what you're doing wrong with approaching a girl than to stay a virgin.
Is there really a good reason why we're not able to edit our comments? This is the second comment that I ever write here and in my first attempt I thought that for some reason, formatting paragraphs etc. wasn't possible so I made the mistake to hit refresh, only to see that refresh updated the formatting but disabled editing.
Good job.
And that's called a strawman fallacy.
Clinton's and Obama's whole reputations rest on #2. Just ride the gravy train right out of office
Reply""We were GOING to write an album, but...Nevermind." The Nirvana Fallacy."
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesAm I the only one who was reminded of the band Nirvana and their album Nevermind while reading this?
That was the entire joke.
So probably not.
Did you just asked, if you were the onley one who's ever herd of, or listened to Nirvana?
I don't know if kidding, or just stupid.
I thought that was obvious enough in the joke that it really didn't need to be explained, but no.
theres 7 billion people on earth, you're not the only ONE of anything
I think he was confused by the distinct lack of baby dick.
I belive you mean "the world is full of dicks PHALLACY"
Reply*rimshot*
There are people who go through life thinking they're the hero of the story of life. These are the people that think everything should go their way, that nothing that goes wrong is their fault, and that they are the most important person in the world.
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesThe root of all evil stems from people that take themselves too seriously. Any time you start to think you're more important than someone else, is when you start down that path. Sometimes, it stays innocent. Maybe you just cut people off on the freeway, or block traffic at an intersection to save yourself 5 seconds when the light changes. Maybe you go a little further, and start stealing, or running rip-off schemes. Maybe you go a step farther and start murdering people, or maybe you go a step farther and convince an entire nation you're right and try to annihilate the entire Jewish race because you're right, and they're wrong.
You're not always going to win. You're going to fail. A lot. There is no writer there to put a lucky plot twist in at the last second. Sitting their cursing your luck and wallowing in a pit of despair at the unfair hand life has dealt you solves nothing. It's not a pit, it's a pothole. Pick yourself up and move on.
Realize that there are no main characters. There are people who accomplish amazing and heroic things, but we are all just supporting cast in this comedic tragedy we call life.
Like the subtle Hitler argument in there...I did.
That should also go for ppl who worship historical figures as if they're god
Well, we all are sort of the hero of our own lives in a way. We perceive ourselves as the protagonist in our lives and every obsticle as the antagonist. It's not really a bad thing if you are actually motivated by challenges, but if you aren't, you will just be cursing the world like it's against you when you realize that you actually have to try in life. Let's not kid ourselves, those people who cut off other people on the highway are self-centered pricks
I agree compleatly. That being sead I think of myself as more of the comedy relief sidekick than the hero.
I've always been taught that number 5 was called hindsight bias. It's the primary reason why Columbine's security "obviously should've been better" or why airport security "obviously should have a better screening process." It's always been my favorite character trait to see in people, if not the most annoying when you're on the other end of it directly...
ReplyNo mom, you "obviously" would NOT have made the call that the guy in front of me was going to slam on his breaks for no reason. I don't care how much "mother's intuition" you have...
At the risk of violating one or more (or all) of the things listed here, I will say that the cops and/or SWAT officers at Columbine should have got into the school library much quicker than they did... it took them hours to enter. More people should have been saved. But instead, while the murders in the library were taking place, there were officers assembled right outside the library, hearing everything that was going on. That, they could have controlled.
^ And that's completely aside of the point.
I believe the latter part of entry #1 can also be referred to as 'The Fundamental Attribution Error' - assuming everyone else is just a dick for doing certain things, whereas if you do the same, it's always for a reason.
ReplyIt was the only interesting lecture throughout the whole of my Psychology module. That, and talking about anal. Weird university.
I remember it had to do with internal and situational attributes. Everything you do is caused by the situation where everyone else does what they do because of their poor internal workings. The issue isn't realizing you're a dumbshit, it's not acting like a jackass when someone does something stupid. Most of what EVERYONE does is caused by the situation.
PS, anal?
To be fair, many cops who don't give tickets to other cops, don't give tons of tickets to everyone else either. Traffic violations are often treated as ways to discover more egregious behavior. This isn't true all the time or in all places, but much of the time if you're polite and cooperative, you'll get away with a warning.
ReplyThat's pretty much exactly what Special Pleading is right there. People really believe their offense is less egregious than everybody else who got the same ticket, and that's exactly what they plea to the cop once he gets to the window. What makes us so special that we deserve to float by with what we skewer others for? We're great at it.
In my experience you're not let off with a warning for being polite and being cooperative. It will though keep the cop from searching or dragging it out. Story time!
I was a bad opioid addict and as such didn't pay a ticket. A year and a half later I'm txting and driving coming back fm getting pills and shooting them up, well I'm swerving and it was a Friday night. Someone calls in a drunk driver and I pass a cop who had someone else pulled over, they jumped right back in their car and pulled me over. I think I'm f*****g done for, I've got several used needles, several large morphine pills, my spoon, and I'm fucked up. The cop comes to the car, we chat, he can tell I'm not drunk and asks if I was txting. I admit to it and he takes my license to run it but as he's walking away I stop him and say "well...there may be a chance my license was suspended..." he checks, sure enough, it is. I'm only half an hr away though so instead of impounding my car and/or searching it, he lets me call someone to pick me and my car up. He even trusted me enough to drive away before my ride got there. I took it as a sign that I should let someone else drive and waited to be picked up.
I've since gotten clean and am very lucky I didn't kill anyone during that time as I'd have to drive four hrs every few days to get my junk. I'd would always do the last two hrs fucked up, too. So, very lucky.
Point is, it always pays to be nice and cooperative, even if you're still ticketed
Man, those people who do special pleading are a bunch of idiots with no self awareness. luckily I don't have any sort of problems with that.
ReplyGreat article, especially the bit on the 'Historian's Fallacy'. I like to call it 'Chronological Snobbery'; the belief that our age is enlightened, and that every human being from any other generation ever is an absolute dolt. You have no idea how many times I run into that one. Anyway...
Reply