The 8 Most Ridiculous Viral Videos of the 08 Election
The internet seems destined to change democracy forever. Anyone can stand up in support of their candidate, and have their voice heard by millions... no matter how fucking insane they are.
So, every election season the web is filled with cringe-worthy videos in "support" of a candidate who, we're guessing, regret the day their supporters figured out how to work a camera. We're talking about videos like...

In this thoughtful piece, motherfuckin' Diddy shares his motherfuckin' thoughts on Sarah fuckin' Palin.
A rapper as a campaign supporter is a dicey proposition, but on the short list of rappers who would seem to make for a decent endorsement, Diddy is right near the top.

He's got a ton of cash, he's fairly well respected as a businessman, and he tends to let other rappers do his shooting for him. Unfortunately, he also has a video blog.

The premise of the video is simple: "John McCain is fuckin' up!" That's not a summary, that's a direct quote. It seems Diddy is unimpressed with McCain's decision to select Sarah Palin as his running mate. In presenting his argument against Sarah Palin, he makes the obvious "lack of experience" point that everyone else does. But then, he brings some new arguments into the fray. Among his politically savvy speaking points:

"Alaska motherfucker?"
"I don't know if there's any black people in Alaska."
"You would let her keep your kids?"
"There's not even no crackheads in Alaska!"
Diddy has a point, Article Two of the United States Constitution clearly states that to be president you must be a natural born citizen, at least 35 years old and have been a permanent resident in a crack infested area of the United States for at least fourteen years. Until this is amended to include meth, Sarah Palin just doesn't qualify. It's also important to note that Diddy makes all of these arguments while inexplicably spinning around in circles the whole time. There may not be crackheads in Alaska, but if this video is any indication, there may be one on the loose in the Hamptons.

McCain supporters are often unfairly stereotyped as being rednecks. It's because of this guy.
Another fine endorsement from the world of music, this time courtesy of John Rich, one half of the duo responsible for "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy." For those of you at work, or with too much good sense to actually watch the video: Imagine those Monday Night Football videos that Hank Williams Jr. does every week. Got it? Cool. Now imagine Hank is singing exclusively about the team most likely to lose the game. That's "Raising McCain."
Speaking of raisins, this woman is old! Pow!
Lest you ever think McCain supporters don't know how to party, this video has everything you need to have a rocking good time. Including...

...menacing facial hair...

...a legendary air fiddle/real fiddle combo solo...

...and of course, party loving midgets!
We bet that elitist Obama doesn't have midgets at his party (bad DNC/Dennis Kucinich jokes notwithstanding).
As much fun as everyone appears to be having, we have to question the thinking behind this particular video. Is "we're all just raising McCain" really the catch phrase you want to use in support of a candidate so quickly approaching his nursing home years? Raising McCain might work as a sitcom about baby-boomers caring for their incontinent father. But we'd be more comfortable with a chorus along the lines of, "we're all just sitting around chillin' while our able bodied president handles shit." A real songwriter could craft a decent tune out of that.

Obama supporters are often unfairly stereotyped as being flamboyant homosexuals. It's because of this guy.
Barack Obama already has a pretty decent number of A-Listers on his side. If this video is any indication, he's got the B-List vote on lockdown also. We weren't even sure who the dude rapping was, so we asked our friend Google. He doesn't know either. We do know he used to be signed to Kanye West's record label and he apparently used that to trick at least one real celebrity into appearing in the video.
Above: Kanye West, presumably moments before his security staff intervenes.
According to the lyrics of the song (all two of them), the gentleman rocking the mic is also "hood," which is clearly displayed in the picture below.
TI$A: pushing the Crips "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy to its absolute limit.
To his credit, TI$A understands that a no name rapper spouting the same two lyrics over a run-into-the-ground Isley Brothers sample isn't going to be enough to put his guy in the White House. So he's enlisted the help of some famous friends, including one of the unimportant dudes from The Black Eyed Peas and, um, some other people.
Can you name the celebs in this picture? (Hint: there are none.)
He also manages to catch former Yo! MTV Raps host Fab Five Freddy driving through the wrong part of Los Angeles at the wrong time. That should help.
Fab Five Freddy: the Reginald Denny of shitty Obama videos.

If it means no more songs like this, by all means, drill wherever the hell you please.
In most cases, you can take any given demographic and, with a fair amount of accuracy, predict who they are going to vote for. Not so with the god-awful-amateur-musician voting bloc. In the last entry, we met some dude who kind of raps and supports Obama. In this video from some cat that supports McCain, we get a painful slice of shitty nu-metal that makes Limp Bizkit sound like The Beatles.

Despite what the title may suggest, "It's Time To Drill" isn't a song about boning. Instead, the devil horns are being raised in favor of offshore drilling. Yeah, you read that right, now are you ready to rock?!?!? No? Well, this is awkward.

But it's not all just terrible tunes going on in this clip. Sure, this guy is a serious musician; he wouldn't be pointing his drumstick in front of those fancy green screen effects if he wasn't.

But he's also a comedian. Don't believe us? Well check this out...

Yep, he's farting in a gas tank. CLASSIC! Seriously, the whole video is exactly...that...funny.








"It's Raining McCain". I don't even...there's no words.
ReplyNormally I'm all, "Go First Amendment!" and such, but really, every single one of these people in this list should be muzzled.
Holy crap... Just.... After watching these, I really wish neither side won.
ReplyI heard the McCain girls were hired by Obama's people. And they're the reason McCain lost the election. Conspiracy!
Replywhat about barocka flocka flame? classic
ReplyAfter number 2, I was ready to send every republican a copy of auto-tune.
ReplyYou forgot the "I Got a Crush on Obama" girl. That was the most annoying/awesome thing off all of them.
ReplyThose guys were really spot on with that off-shore drilling thing... Champions, all of them.
ReplyHilarious! Though really... Alaska has its share of crackheads. The town of North Pole is full of that shit.
ReplyOH GOD WHY??!! MY EARS ARE BLEEDING!!!
ReplyUmmm, why did the Raining McCain girls make the fat ugly chick as the front woman. Clearly the "something's off but I'd still fuck her" girl to the right should be in front.
ReplyAnd why the hell is that big Trugoy-looking girl splashing McCain on her face???
to the previous post:
Replydude.... you fucking suck my balls.
any way. i love bush. he may have been authorized to go nuts... but hes the first president to utilize facial expressions on full auto.
No.
ReplyJody, played by Forest Whitaker, is the lover of Dil, played by Jaye Davidson. Jody is not Dil's brother. Jody is Dil's lover.
Also, Dil is not a shemale.
Get your facts straight.
I know you were just trying to make a joke, but Forest Whitaker's character in the Crying Game died before the Shemale even appeared in the film. He was the brother of the shemale.
Replythe best part about the McCainiac vid is when the threaten that he will cut him if you mess with his candidacy, or when they pretend he's a robocop/dynacorp hybrid
Replydid anyone see the McCainiac monstrosity that was linked to the McCain vid? my ears threw up
ReplyAfro Ninja ftw. Btw: that vid was screened during his stunt job interview. also: He got the job. hmm....
ReplyWow. I never knew that Alaska had no crime or crackhead. What a waste. Damn them
ReplyIt pained me to watch the McCain girls, yet I couldn't look away, like a moth to a flame, except its over nice and quick for moths.
ReplyI never watch viral videos.
ReplyThe only one I cared enough to watch was Afro Ninja back flipping onto his face. The rest are garbage.
they're not "viral" if they suck ass
ReplyYes they are. It doesn't have to be good to be viral. Rebecca Black was viral.
I've had a stomach virus. That sucked.