Sure, we were inspired when Michael Phelps broke every world record ever despite a presumably painful condition that causes him to shit gold medals. But take a look down the roster of Olympic events and you'll see those ... other sports. The ones that draw crowds with less energy and a higher concentration of parents than a 5 year-old's piano recital.
Luckily, there's a tier of sports-in-waiting that are "officially recognized" by the Olympic Committee and could be added at any time. Here are six that make us wonder what the hell they're waiting for:
If you watch some of the track and field events and think how much cooler it would be if the contestants were in helicopters, then rotorsports are for you. That's right, helicopter racing is among the sports recognized by the International Olympic Committee, but were apparently considered too awesome to include in the games. With top speeds over 200 miles an hour, it's all of the fun of Formula One racing with the added bonus of giant, spinning, metal blades of death.
Sure there's the issue of whether this is really a sport as the helicopter is doing the work, but the same argument applies to Dressage, and Olympic event which is basically slow horse dancing, where the rider does fuck all except tell the horse where to go. You decide what looks cooler:
Anytime you have fast moving machines you also get the potential for some fearsome crashes and, just like NASCAR, a lot of us would tune in just for that. The difference is that when a helicopter goes down it doesn't just crash, it also breaks apart into big, angry pieces looking to take down everyone else around it.
Tell us that wasn't more entertaining than watching some guy swim really fast.