Black Men are after our women: Vogue
So the April 2008 issue of Vogue has recently hit newsstands, which marks the beginning of a new regular feature here on Cracked where we’ll examine each month’s issue of Vogue: All up in Vogue’s Crack: An Analysis and Discourse. Which, if we read our webstats correctly, is exactly what our audience (pale men, ages 18-35) is looking for.
Haha. That’s just a little April Fool’s day joke for you there. I felt it necessary to at least make a token gesture to this, the funniest day of the year, but didn’t want to go overboard on the April’s Fool day stuff. Which is why you were spared an Onion-esque “Obama names Morgan Freeman as running mate” headline or the obvious “Anti-Christ Returns” joke. You’re welcome.
Ok, let’s get serious about Vogue (yes, I am gonna go through with this). On the cover this month is a picture of a roaring LeBron James, dribbling a basketball in one hand, with Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bündchen grasped in his other. Where a basketball fan might look at this image, nod sagely, and state that it merely depicts LeBron’s well known ability to brush aside supermodels when driving the lane, movie aficionados look at this image and see something completely different: a fairly blatant reference to the 1933 film King Kong.
Which seems clever for the fraction of a second it takes you to realize that comparing a black man to an ape is one of those “red flag” topics that you so often hear you should stop bringing up during job interviews. So what happened here? Did the editors at Vogue slip, or are they honestly warning us of the danger black men present to our nation’s most valuable resource (in the eyes of the editors of Vogue): white women?
First, in defense of the image: both LeBron and Gisele look stunning in it. More importantly, so does Gisele’s dress, particularly the way that it sort of sits on Gisele’s body like that, while also looking like it might fall off at a moments notice. Very dynamic. If you had a checklist of things that make a good cover image for your fashion magazine, this one would tick off many of the boxes on it: celebrity - check, Gisele Bündchen - check, Gisele Bündchen’s clothes potentially falling off - check, etc. So if the editors of Vogue want to preach ignorance, and claim that it’s a perfectly innocent and legitimate cover photo, they’ve got a good case.
But come on. This was no accident. Cover images are chosen very, very carefully, and the editors of Vogue were completely aware of what this image suggested. So are they secretly racist? Probably not. My guess is no-one at Vogue is more worried about black men taking their women than they are about Chinese men taking their women. Instead, I suspect they chose the image specifically to drum up buzz with something that could be considered vaguely controversial. Here I’m imagining a wishy-washy conversation going on amongst the editors about how a vaguely racist cover will foster a public conversation about race in America today. “We’re not being racist! We’re deliberately bringing it up so we can deliberately ignore it, and say it doesn’t matter! Also, and not to stress this too much, this would probably help us sell a bunch of magazines!”
Here’s the thing: for all the advancements made in the last few decades, racism is still kind of a big problem. It’s bigger than the Cos, and he used to solve murders every week. Surprisingly, it’s even bigger than a blog entry on a comedy web site. So I don’t expect Vogue to step up to the plate and solve it in a single 12 page photo shoot. But I do expect them to at least offer something substantial to the conversation. Drumming up a controversy to sell magazines is a time-honored publishing tactic (you’ll recall of course, Cracked’s own “Why You’re Too Stupid To Vote” issue.) But to invoke a very real, very important social problem, then offer no useful words on the subject? It’s hackery.
So, to try and derive something positive out of all of this, I encourage all Cracked readers to forgo their regular purchase of Vogue this month, and also to shake a black man’s hand, and tell him: “You’re ok. I would trust my women around you.”
___
Chris Bucholz is a writer and a robot. His personal blog, robotmantheblog.com contains a great deal of other humor articles, all of dubious quality and taste.
April 1st, 2008 at 8:16 am
Is there anyone who DOESN’T think this is Chris’s best post? Bravo, sir.
April 1st, 2008 at 8:28 am
this was supposed to be funny and it was in it’s own small way. I would like to say that if you look at a picture of a black man with a white woman and think, “Holy shit, it’s a king kong reference!” Maybe YOU are the racist one.
April 1st, 2008 at 8:52 am
The way Lebron is hunched and seems to be screaming it’s easy to make the connection to an animal. This argument is so old, the black man being a savage. It’s sad that they chose this cover, even if they’re not racist they are reproducing and confirming a terrible cliche.
Bad bad vogue… and they could’ve given him nicer shorts
April 1st, 2008 at 9:11 am
12 Chinamen and a Woman is almost the ratio in China today! This must have been a movie (book?) that could see into the future! (I guess it’s not even close 944:1 is the ratio…)
April 1st, 2008 at 10:28 am
All they would have had to do to make the cover a perfect reference to King Kong and Savagery is remove that basketball from the picture…and honestly, who really believes they had a basketball in the photo? I think they added it later.
April 1st, 2008 at 10:30 am
He’s got a frowny face. Big deal. Maybe there would be an argument if she was cowering in fear or he was about to ‘bitch slap” her, but she’s not.
We should be more worried about why Vogue is so mind-numbingly stupid, than the underlying prejudices inherent in their cover picture.
April 1st, 2008 at 10:50 am
Wow, these comments are depressing. I read depressing stuff at a tall dating site~~~~~~~Tallmingle.com, there are many hot models.
April 1st, 2008 at 10:50 am
Why does this say Chris Bucholz, when anyone who’s ever read this blog can tell this was written by Swaim?!
April 1st, 2008 at 11:01 am
Funny stuff… I wish my blog was this good.
April 1st, 2008 at 11:24 am
Jason Whitlock at foxsports.com wrote a good article about this a week ago. Like him, I believe this is a total non-issue. The first thing I thought when I saw that cover is that LeBron could probably charge down the court carrying a supermodel at the same time, because he’s that amazing.
http://msn.foxsports.com/nba/story/7955740/Am-I-supposed-to-be-mad-about-LeBron?
April 1st, 2008 at 11:49 am
Forego my regular purchase of Vogue? I think you overestimate your influence Bucholz/Swaim!
April 1st, 2008 at 1:09 pm
The Association for Primate Emancipation (APE) has released the following statement on behalf of King Kong: “Though Mr. Kong respects LeBron James, he resents the insinuation implicit in the Vogue Magazine cover photo that a thespian of Mr. Kong’s stature could share anything in common with the other, more typically obnoxious, arrogant, and thuggish NBA ’superstars’ polluting America’s basketball courts.”
April 1st, 2008 at 3:19 pm
Speaking of April fools, I need a really good idea for a prank. Any ideas to help me out here?
April 1st, 2008 at 3:53 pm
I didn’t get the King Kong reference, but when I saw that cover on the stands, I still did a double take. It seemed really weird that he was … yelling, or something, and holding on to a smiling chick AND bouncing a ball. It seemed like an unnatural and agressive pose, and I wondered, “Why the hell is a screaming man on the cover of Vogue?” It would have been much more natural and pleasant to see him holding a basketball, smiling, maybe flexing, next to the sunny Gisele. I mean, if he’s screaming and running down the court, why is he taking the girl with him? Wouldn’t she be a little more upset about the roaring? I just thought it was weird.
April 1st, 2008 at 5:11 pm
Maybe we all need to calm down a bit on this whole racism thing. I make fun of a friend of mine constantly because he is ACTUALLY a red-headed stepchild (I bet it’s making some of you laugh just thinking about it.) Does that make me red-headed-step-childist?
Look, I realize racism is bad and all, but being super uptight and looking for racism everywhere only exaserbates the problem. I make fun of my wife for being black all the time. She makes fun of me for being white. Just like my friend, we know it’s in good fun.
My wife and I are expecting our first child soon. One time I remarked socially “I actually hate black people, which means I’ll half hate my baby.” I was being ironic, but you would have thought I called Dr. King the n-word.
Another time I sat on a convention panel on interracial dating. I was truly saddened and disheartened to hear a man tell me the love my wife and I share was unnatural. That was the type of racism I hate.
All I’m saying is think about it this way: Sometimes there will be things that weren’t really meant to be offensive but if you really want to, you can make them so. Will that really be helping the problem at all?
When you get together with your friends (I mean your REAL friends, not the guy in the next cube) do you make somewhat awkward polite conversation? Or do you rip on eachother mercilessly out of love? You tell me. Which is the real friendship?
I don’t mean to preach, but please, don’t take yourselves too seriously. There’s no need to be sensitive about everything. A little bit of ribbing never hurt anyone. Hell, it might even heal a few wounds.
April 1st, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Chris, you so blew this. He’s not dribbling the ball. He dropped it as he’s in terrible pain brought on by the power wedgie Giselle has a grip on. Why do you think she’s finding this so damn funny? Beotch!
April 1st, 2008 at 5:38 pm
I think the people who are making a ruckus over this are white male who are jealous because that woman looks happy to be with a black man racists
April 1st, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I wait for Swaim to weigh in on all issues of race before I make up my mind. I can take comfort in knowing that by saying the opposite of what Swaim oes I am in the right since everything he says is so inherently racist.
April 1st, 2008 at 9:33 pm
What a disappointing post. First off, Vogue is not required to add anything substantial to the discussion of race in this country. They’re a fucking magazine that is interested in selling, you guessed it, magazines.
Secondly, I have come to conclusion that most people don’t eve know what the word “racism” means. Racism is the belief that one race is superior to another. However, scientifically speaking, there is no such thing as race. It doesn’t exist. So, if you don’t believe that race exists, then you can’t be racist. You can have prejudice against certain cultures, but we all do. It doesn’t mean that someone wants a specific group of people’s rights thrown out.
Finally, what people often refer to as “racist,” is actually called “prejudice.” Even if Vogue was trying to recreate the King Kong photo, it doesn’t mean that it’s because they think black people are apes. Correlation does not always equal causation.
The reality is, prejudice exists all over the world in vast quantities. You can’t eliminate it because it’s human. As long as an individual’s rights are protected, things can be said and done that you don’t like.
No one has a right to not be offended, and it’s kind of pathetic to watch such a quality humor sight delve into sober social commentary. Leave that shit to bloggers who take themselves far too seriously, or you know, just stop.
I consider this post your “Ellen” moment.
April 1st, 2008 at 10:22 pm
I laughed uproariously at those photos without even thinking of the whole “black people = monkeys” racism thing. It was sort of just like “OH MAN. He totally DOES look like King Kong.” I’m so progressive.
April 1st, 2008 at 11:20 pm
King Kong was racist, not so much for its time, but King Kong was clearly a metaphor for a Black slave who was freed into a world too complicated for him. It didn’t blame Black people for crime, but it still said that they were less capable of functioning civilly.
April 2nd, 2008 at 12:30 am
Actually, I believe King Kong was a movie about a really big ape that climbed up on shit and swatted airplanes, created to get people to PAY MONEY TO WATCH IT. Not quite as interesting to debate in your graduate level ‘Principles of Film Noir’ class, but—hey, facts is facts.
I’m with Mortimer and TillyKGB. Calm down, it’s a FASHION magazine. As if they somehow took advantage of LeBron James—-c’mon, I’d feel more oppressed if I had to fork over $50 to watch him and his Rhodes Scholar teammates run up ‘n down the court for a couple hours while consuming an $8 hotdog and $5 soft drink. And then, see if anyone lets YOU into HIS neighborhood–fat chance.
No, I don’t believe one can exactly toss the R-word around in 2008, the way one could 40 years ago. You can build your own pyramid, or dig your own hole in this society: take your pick.
April 2nd, 2008 at 1:12 am
I hate Gypsies.
Just my two cents.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:08 am
I think babies are ugly.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:17 am
It’s obviously a pose so people actually know who he is.
Vogue and the NBA do not have the same demographic.
Least I hope not. That’d be terrifying.
April 2nd, 2008 at 8:42 am
Ross is right, Vogue and the NBA court different demographics. (Get it? Court?) It’s not like the NHL and Soap Opera Weekly.
April 2nd, 2008 at 9:00 am
I still gate it how people are sensitive about the n-word. It may be isulting in the US of A, but here it means “a man that has black skin”. Negras!
April 2nd, 2008 at 9:42 am
When I saw this a little piece of my sould died right there in the check-out line at Target
April 2nd, 2008 at 10:18 am
I was under the impression that black people LIKED being likened to the image of King Kong. I refer you to the lyrics of Ice motherfucking Cube for reference: “Gorilla niggas, here comes King Kong.”
Clearly I may be in error, and I humbly beg Mr. Cube to explain to me his meaning.
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:56 am
It still doesn’t cover why he’s yelling like a maniac.
I’m guessing because it’s one of his hobbies.
I bet Vogue would never thought they’d have to clear up a debate on racism. I imagine it’d make their regular readership’s head explode.
“Oh hey, Vogue, pages and pages of fashion tinsel, oh but what’s this? An overblown debate on accidental vs intentional racism and the issue of perception? No thank YOU.”
April 2nd, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Vogue…. never touch the stuff. Together with Marie Claire and Cosmo you have the holy waste-of-paper trinity.
April 2nd, 2008 at 12:33 pm
Am I the only one who thinks they’re just calling LeBron James an ape, not the entire black population?
April 2nd, 2008 at 12:35 pm
The shot was not intended to be racist, but merely contains the kind of subtle multi-layered pop culture references a hip and edgy Vogue photographer must include in his or her work in order to remain employed in New York City’s cutthroat high-fashion industry. The difference is this time you were smart enough to get it.
April 2nd, 2008 at 1:56 pm
stupid, stupid, stupid….womens’ magazines..
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:12 pm
nice post dude
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:19 pm
All friends ask of dating mammalian fauna. I know Primates online and we conversation. ~~~~~~~Apemingle.com, there are many seductive humanoids.
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:24 pm
wow…photoshoppers are getting good.
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:32 pm
King Kong, both the original and late remake, is about black men stealing our white women. Maybe someone ought to be offended by that?
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:06 pm
only thing that makes sense there is that hes holding a ball
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:12 pm
Is a black man dating a white woman some kind of problem? It only becomes an issue when the media starts pointing their fingers at it and going “look! look! They’re two different colors! Naughty magazine!” Would this be a problem if the woman was chinese or Spanish? Who’s really the racist here?
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:37 pm
I don’t have any opinion on interracial dating; I have a hard enough time trying to get the intraracial kind to work out.
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:38 pm
so yeah… vogue magazine. its a pwot for fashionistas right? on an unrelated note, THIS post was fuh-nay.
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:43 pm
jesus fucking christ, he’s a basketball player. that was his game face. now if that would have been the cover of jet, or ebony magazine, that would have been the dopest cover ever. but since it’s for vogue, it’s so racist. wait until the next issue when the cover is dakota fanning hanging 50 cent by a noose.
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:45 pm
TillyKGB I totally agree. I’m a SWF and I live in a house with a girl from China, a girl from Nigeria and a girl from France. I’m biologically 1st generation Italian-American so we call ourselves the International House of Chicks. We make fun of each other ALL the time. My roommate from Nigeria insists on claiming she’s on “BPT” when she’s late (Black People Time) and if we don’t laugh…then she’s insulted–she’s always late for EVERYTHING. We all have our little things…and if you can’t joke about them with your friends then who can you joke about them with? It’s not like we REALLY mean them and we’re going to go around town making racial jokes…that’s wrong and dumb. We all have our own heritage and skin tones. I’m a LOT darker than my French roommate who’s pasty white…and has since been dubbed “Whitey” of the house. We have all colors covered and I think that if someone wants to call me racist, they can come and hang out at my house for a little bit…I embrace diversity. Those who are too sensitive about racial diversity or those who point it out, point it out for a reason…because they’re conscious about the differences. Most of us go on throughout our day without thinking in black and white. I see a person…not a skintone and nothing you say to me is going to change that.
Oh and frankly, I really don’t think anyone is claiming “This magazine is proof that black men are stealing our white women” because we ALL know who Gisele is dating. It’s not like we looked the magazine and said “hmm…I thought Gisele was dating Brady….not LeBran…weird.” The average person sees it and thinks “Basketball player screaming with a gorgeous super model looking happy.” Or in my case “I really like her dress…where can I get one.”
Only racist people point out racist things. That’s the bottom line.
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:53 pm
Even if King Kong was a “metaphor for a Black slave who was freed into a world too complicated for him”, like HoldenHackerHam says, why the fuck would that be racist? Take any person from any culture, and try inserting him in a completely different cultural context, and it’s gonna be “too complicated for him”. A lot of times, racism lies in the eye of the beholder.
April 2nd, 2008 at 3:56 pm
Oh yeah, and about Milliner’s post, on “King Kong being about black men staling our white women”… You managed to be both racist and sexist at the same time.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:04 pm
Anon, wtf? You are an immature naive fool that thinks you are better than someone else simply b/c of the color of their skin! You make me sick.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:06 pm
It doesn’t matter what colour lebrons skin is, he’s still a monster
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:19 pm
People that look at that image and think racist thoughts are the racist ones. Lebron looks intense, Giz looks happy, get over it.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:20 pm
I agree that racism is a problem. it’s a problem because blacks, asians, sand-monkeys, all them non-humans exist, that’s the problem.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:32 pm
The first time i saw this cover, i thought it was cool. To me it was too people at the top of their game.
As for the King Kong reference, I never saw it until they mentioned it. Then I thought the cover was even cooler because they captured the moment perfectly.
I agree with Petra, people were looking racism.
Plus, I think it was a ploy to sell the magazine with controversy. Lebron is the first black man on the cover for Vogue. I’m sure there demographe would have questioned the cover and bought it because they are hooked and curious
I’m also sure that people that don’t buy Vouge, saw the big controversy on tv and went and bought the magazine to find out more. Its all a dupe to buy the bloody magazine!!!
I wish Jane was still around. That was a great magazine
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Did a white-man FORCE LeBron to pose for this? I agree with earlier post, this is about prejudice not racism. LeBron is stood there being a big, strong, take-no-crap, kick-ass black man - which is a prejudice that a lot of black men have about themselves! nothing to do with the evil white man running a magazine cover.
on a similar note, THIS COVER SHOWS A WOMAN BEING NOTHING MORE THAN A TROPHY FOR A DOMINANT MAN! RISE UP WOMEN, NO LONGER WILL WE BE DEMEANED LIKE THIS!
lesson: you can read whatever the hell you like into WHATever the hell you like - it’s more to do with your OWN prejudices than the artist’s.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:33 pm
By the way , Gisele is Brazilian, not white. The girl stands close to 6 feet. Im sure she could handle herself.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:35 pm
I am a 19 year old female and I read both Cracked and Vogue religiously. When I read about the addition of “All up in Vogue’s Crack: An Analysis and Discourse” as a new monthly feature, I was the most excited I have been in ages. Too bad it was an April Fools joke, cause I would love that.
April 2nd, 2008 at 4:57 pm
Sand monkeys? Oh Arabs. Christ, cause the white people are so much superior, ranging from the pig ignorant red-necks to the right wing fanatics. (being pasty English-Irish i am as white as they come). I mean look at you “gimp” your probably white, and stupid enough to come out with crap like that. There is many a black man who is no small amount smarter than you.
People who look at the image and think racist thoughts are not necessarily racist. I often think i would like to kick the bloody shite out of people i do not like. However that does not make me violent (i am in fact one of the largest pacifists out of most people i know, in both senses of the word “large”). Racists are people who not only think racist thoughts, but act on them as well.
@Notworkingathome, nice post and i agree with you. However it is not just racist people who point out racist things, humans are social creatures and pick up habits. When racism becomes a big thing, then other people who it would not occur to, pick it up. (IE anti-racism and positive discrimination plaguing Britain) and anything that is related to race becomes racism. For example this article;
I think that vogue magazine was being intentionally inflammatory, however i disagree with this article’s position of it as being racist. How is taking a issue which is popular in the news and using it to draw attention racist?
Barring some of the comments on this thread, the most racist thing i see here is this article which is taking that picture and turning it into a race-relations topic.
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Gimp has the grammar of a 6 year old and lives in a trailer.
LeBron James makes up to $3 million a season.
Coincidence?
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:30 pm
Hey, where the white women at?
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:31 pm
Gisele Bündchen reminded me of “The birth of venus” by Botticelli and Leron James of Jesus.
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Fuck my keyboard. The man is called LeBron James.
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Gimp: Good flame. Looks like a couple fell for it. Next time add in a Rick Roll if you want to really get them good.
Everyone else: I think some of yall need to revisit what the term racism means. Racial =/= racism. White people, take special note of this. We are certainly the most insecure about it. After I started dating my future wife (who is black) my then 12-year-old brother refered to a man as an “African-American gentleman” when he normally would have said “black guy.” I laughed. My brother’s not racist. He just knows racism is bad and wanted to make sure he wasn’t being it, even if he wasn’t quite sure what is and is not racism.
The point of that anecdote? Again, EVERYONE NEEDS TO LIGHTEN UP A BIT.
Finally, I saw a great video post by a guy who suggested some sort of manual on what was racist and what the appropriate response is (outrage, frustration, sadness, etc.) I think it’s funny, and probably not a bad idea. Check it out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBGIQ7ZuuiU&fmt=7
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:40 pm
You are all hereby crushed under the weight of my unbelievable racism.
April 2nd, 2008 at 5:40 pm
To say that a black man holding a white woman is akin to a gorilla holding a white woman is to imply that black people should be identified with gorillas. That is racist, the photo itself is not. It almost seems like asking if a fat person is pregnant. When they say “No, I’m not” then the only thing they can think is “I am fat and have a gut.” You tell anyone to be offended by a black guy and then point to a picture of King Kong, that’s the same as saying “I think you’re kind of like an ape, so this offends me and it should offend you.”
If you want to eliminate racism you have to stop telling people that a connection exists between apes and people of african descent. Stop holding society’s hands.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:18 pm
the author of this article sees a gorilla and thinks “black-man”. that’s the bottom line here. i’m a big fan of king-kong, seen it (the original!) maybe 10 times as a kid, and i would NEVER have looked at that vogue cover and thought “wow, that black man looks just like a big black ape”. chris, you have all sorts of problems man. if anyone’s publications gonna be boycotted, it’s yours.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:19 pm
I was actually more interested in how a woman dresses for a size 16 and not look like she’s wearing a circus tent.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Maybe it’s just me, but to view this cover as a racist statement is racist in itself. This is merely a portrayal of the famous beauty and beast metaphor. LeBron is a beast at basketball and Gisele is a beautiful model.
If you look at a black man and think “gorilla” you have some issues you need to work out.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:42 pm
I’m a little put off by everyone who has said something like
“People who look at things and see racism are racist.”
Just because someone doesn’t blast you in the face with a big ole burning cross doesn’t mean things can’t be racist, and just because people don’t talk about racism to you or you are not racist doesn’t mean racism is not real.
Also and more importantly the above quote can be extrapolated to mean that interpreting the meaning of something that is other then the literal is wrong or misguided. People who suggest that imagery can’t have more than one meaning lack imagination and greater skill at interpretation and analysis.
April 2nd, 2008 at 6:53 pm
Why is it racist to compare a black man to King Kong? I would love to be compared to King Kong and I am white. Is it because I am white that I am not being compared to him, no, it is because I am a skinny nerdy looking white man, that does not remotely ressemble the awesomeness that is King Kong. People should just stop trying to be so politically correct.
April 2nd, 2008 at 7:10 pm
Uh… huh. Okay then.
April 2nd, 2008 at 7:20 pm
They have LeBron “roaring” because he’s a basketball player, not because he is black. There are a lot of magazine covers with flexing grimacing white athletes, I guess to show how tough and badass they are supposed to be…
Gisele’s there to provide contrast to him…and because she’s hot.
April 2nd, 2008 at 7:47 pm
No one has brought this up, but Lebron is a big enough star to show up on the cover alone, why didn’t they just show Lebron alone?
Also, why’d they show women a side of Lebron they’ve already seen (a monster on the court) instead the side people rarely see which is a guy with A TON of style. Lebron (when not on the court) is always impeccably well-dressed, like seriously hes a trend-setter.
THATS FUCKIN RACISM!!
lol
April 2nd, 2008 at 9:02 pm
To those going for the inverted racism argument (”only a racist would notice such a trivial nuance….”), Bucholz already answered your argument in his post. Very well, actually.
April 2nd, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Well… I don’t know, I mean, I do see your point, but, I’m a big movie fan and “King Kong” didn’t popped up in my mind when I saw the cover, if anything I think is not a very flattering pose for LeBron James.
Aren’t you taking this a bit too seriously? C’mon, not buying the Vogue number is a really lousy social statement.
And even if they did this intentionally so they could intentionally ignore it, the only way they can ignore is if someone points it out, like you did.
April 2nd, 2008 at 10:29 pm
@justakid:
So she can’t be white because she’s brazillian?
I didn’t quite get the impossibility of both…
April 2nd, 2008 at 10:38 pm
I think a lot of people are kind of missing the point here. it doesn’t really matter if vogue meant anything by this image or not. The fact is that it DOES perpetuate a negative sterotype. whether or not the first thing you see when you look at that image is it’s relationship to the King Kong image, it doesn’t change the fact that LeBron’s pose is one that is intimidating, even a little scary. This creates a subconcious suggestion that black man=scary. Maybe the pose was chosen by the executives at Vogue and maybe it was chosen by LeBron himself, but one way or another it was a socially irresponsible choice. It would be nice if we lived in a society where something like this didn’t matter, but unfortunately there is still a lot of racism in the world today and anyone who is in media does need to be sensitive to the message that they are sending or else these kinds of negative stereotypes will not go away.
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:17 pm
if you look at a monkey and a black person, the hair is completely different. a black man has “kinky’ “nappy” spirally hair, while every monkey on this planet (including the white man) has straight hair. so who is the real monkey? hmmmmmmm
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:38 pm
maybe the cover was really a direct reference to King Kong but in a good way… Lebron James is known as King James… and what better way to show kingly power than a very powerful animal (although a lion is powerful as well)
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:46 pm
THIS is where it came from….even more offensive:
http://images.huffingtonpost.com/gen/16600/original.jpg
April 2nd, 2008 at 11:59 pm
I really never made the connection between the two pictures till I read of it on the net. I think it’s silly!!!!
April 3rd, 2008 at 12:40 am
But suppose God is black? What if we go to Heaven and we, all our lives, have treated the “Black-man” as an inferior, and God is there, and we look up and He is not white? What then is our response?
April 3rd, 2008 at 12:46 am
SERIOUSLY STRICT BUSINESS.
April 3rd, 2008 at 1:02 am
King Kong was Hitler’s favorite movie. Really.
April 3rd, 2008 at 1:16 am
Tyler, that is fucking retarded. God is white. End-of-story.
April 3rd, 2008 at 1:17 am
Hey, thats the exact same article that I read on ESPN.com. Except not as well written. And less funny.
April 3rd, 2008 at 2:10 am
I think those bastards may have photoshopped in the basketball!
April 3rd, 2008 at 2:55 am
“12 Chinamen and a Woman is almost the ratio in China today! This must have been a movie (book?) that could see into the future! (I guess it’s not even close 944:1 is the ratio…)”
Perhaps its written by the same dude who penned Demolition Man…set in the future with its ‘Arnold Scharzenegger Presidential Library’
To quote:
“Lenina Huxley: Yes. The Schwarzenegger Presidential Library. Wasn’t he an actor when you…?
JohnSpartan: Stop! He was President? ”
To make the film cooler John is not only John, but John Spartan. He definitely beat the ‘300′. Great film. And, oh yeah, Wesley Snipes is bad in it. And he’s black. Hollywood is racist. Dicks.
April 3rd, 2008 at 7:03 am
ummm justakid brazilian is a nationality, shes still white.
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:12 am
Zam: you dumb piece of shit. The ape in that picture is a German. See what I mean? You’re looking for racism where it just isn’t.
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:21 am
Hey Chris,
Can you get me Clay’s autograph?
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:55 am
and this was Annie Liebovitz’s work, wasn’t it? Damn.
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:23 am
Tilly. you fucking cunt…I was just pointing out that they got the fucking idea from that poster. I didn’t say anything about racism. Eat shit.
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:37 am
Definitely meant to be Beauty and the Beast, not King Kong. The prejudice on this cover is the same prejudice Vogue sells every month: a woman is nothing without a man.
April 3rd, 2008 at 10:25 am
Can’t we just say that LeBron looks hilariously like King Kong in that picture and let the chips fall where they may?
April 3rd, 2008 at 10:29 am
Seriously, I thought the magazine cover was a bit racist when I first saw it at the store. Now with the King Kong side-by-side comparison, it’s eerie. And whoever thinks that someone is racist for thinking that the cover is racist is kind of a jerkhole. I’m not racist at all but I can still point out racism when I see it and sometimes the results are hilarious. People are too fuckin uptight nowadays. Life is simpler when you can make fun of yourself. I rip on the fact I’m a lazy Puerto Rican all the time.
April 3rd, 2008 at 10:57 am
lol how would you picture a 6.10 stack of dark colored muscles? like a teen schoolgirl with ponytails? cmon…
then again, beauty (and racism in this case) lies in the eye.
americanssenseofhumor
besides, as a white almost-bald middle aged man i hardly can see lebron james as an “inferior race”… really…
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:44 am
Well, perhaps if blacks didn’t act like savages and primates, they wouldn’t be associated so closely with them.
April 3rd, 2008 at 11:58 am
Neil, that’s not blacks you’re describing, just professional athletes in general.
April 3rd, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Lebron does look like an ape. As a matter of fact I believe all negroes look like apes.
April 3rd, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Maybe apes look like negroes. You sicken me Lasers. Really you do.
April 3rd, 2008 at 1:46 pm
I once accused a man of racism just after he lynched black guy. If only I had come here first I would have realised I was the racist one for even seeing the dead guy was black. Of course I can look back and laugh now.
April 3rd, 2008 at 2:28 pm
So, I am I the only one who looked at the picture and thought nothing but, “hmm, nice looking woman. Oh well, moving on.”?
If I were really a girl, instead of a semi-masculine monster Darren O’Brian created to leverage him unwarranted fame on the internet, I would probably have gone “Hmm, nice looking guy. Oh well”
As I recall from my teenage years Vogue was much more titillating than any other magazine that a thirteen-year old boy could easily get ahold of. My guess is that really they are just covering their bases.
Not that it matters what I think but hey, what else are we going to do with the internet?
April 3rd, 2008 at 2:54 pm
She isn’t white woman. She is light skined, but not white by heritage. white people are mostly Europeans.
Thats not the point thought.
I look at her and she is not a Damsel in Distress at all.
That is the American view of things.
April 3rd, 2008 at 3:29 pm
Is it just me or is the only thing racist this blog entry? It’s the SHAPE issue which is about different body types so they juxtaposed a thin woman with a very large athlete to show contrast. The author of this post is probably the only person in the world who looks at a pic of LeBron and concludes it must be making a reference to King Kong.
Also, Gisele is Brazillian you even mention that in the article. She’s pretty clearly not white.
April 3rd, 2008 at 3:35 pm
Also in reference to “No one has brought this up” and others - LeBron is not on the cover alone because no man has ever been on the cover of Vogue alone. There are rarely any men on the cover at all, maybe one every 3 years.
ps - Gisele is clearly smiling in the picture and in now way is portrayed as weak or in distress or held against her will.
April 3rd, 2008 at 4:08 pm
At least it didn’t turn out like this:
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/5803/voguelolre1.png
April 3rd, 2008 at 5:13 pm
STOP saying you are not racist/prejudice, the second you see someone you make assumptions. When you see a black man wearing baggy clothes and a cocked hat, do you think “I could be friends with that guy”?
April 3rd, 2008 at 5:32 pm
A lot of black men look like monkeys. It’s true. If it wasn’t it wouldn’t be racist.
April 3rd, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Holy crap, LeBron’s nickname is King, isn’t it? That right there is some bullshit.
April 3rd, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Vogue? Cracked should tackle Cosmo (Cosmopolitan)! Or is that too easy a target?
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:13 pm
TO:
petra Says:
April 1st, 2008 at 8:28 am
Well Petra, it is unfortunately not just a King Kong reference but a rather usual visual in early propaganda as well, which you might realize if you check out the link i put here.
The “monster grabbing woman” pose is not only common in U.S. imagery but exists in a couple of European war-time propaganda posters as well
US example, classic wartime poster
http://home.comcast.net/%7Ekrkaufman/du/lebron_as_brute2.jpg
April 3rd, 2008 at 8:14 pm
And the weirdest part is that the photo is taken by one of the worlds most respected mag and ad photographers Annie Liebovitz directly under Anna Wintour’s supervision.
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Well thank God that people with too much free time on their hands told me this was a racist picture. I might have otherwise thought it was just a funny picture!
April 3rd, 2008 at 9:44 pm
You people are all idiots a brazillion is a number not a person DUH!
April 4th, 2008 at 3:50 am
It’s hard to know where to start with this. Well, first off, “racism” = not funny. Even more, “made up racism” = extra not funny. “I’m better than other people because I think that they are raaaacist” = un-laugh riot. Second, Robotman, you are comparing LeBron to an ape, not Vogue. Maybe you’re raaaacist. Third, seems like Vogue put a black man and white woman hugging on the cover of their mag. If they were trying to keep the two apart, seems like kinda a funny way to do it.
April 4th, 2008 at 6:23 am
The tards are in full force here.
April 4th, 2008 at 7:45 am
When I first saw the image, I just thought it looked like the cover to every science fiction novel printed in the 1950’s: muscular man, check; holding a beautiful woman, check; laser pistol… laser pistol… what’s a basketball?
April 4th, 2008 at 8:06 am
Tom Brady must be scared. He lost the perfect season and now this, King James holding his woman.
April 4th, 2008 at 8:17 am
blame Anna Wintour for this gaffe
April 4th, 2008 at 9:16 am
You. Go. Boy. Bravo!
April 4th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
I read an article in my school newspaper that sounded way too similar to your blog post. Read it here and decide for yourself : http://media.www.theminaretonline.com/media/storage/paper1025/news/2008/04/04/Commentary/Derrick.And.Lebron.Vs.The.World-3299195.shtml
April 4th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Look who in the FUCK is talking!! Seriously EVERY TIME one of these pseudo-’liberal’,pseudo intellectual,closet bigots themselves RAGS like Crapped on itself tries to start a racial debate I cringe like I just ate 6 ice cubes. They are the LAST people on the planet to talk and so are some of you and the only thing ‘offensive’ is the stupidity yeah why in the HELL is he screaming?!! Did Giselle step on his foot and yeah he should be dressed differently than on the basketball court they wouldn’t have Robert England on the cover with a fake severed head but on Crack magazine should NOT be trying to have an objective debate. That goes triple for YOU newslamp and neil if AYTHING the so-called ‘fans’ are nothing but whiny,ARROGANT,stupid,druken,foolish, and yes R-A-C-I-S-T pricks yourselves. Like the asshole and the assholes who constantly lament on the price of going to a game yet go there just to be drunk,dumb shits and yet NEVER complian about the fact it now cost 12 FUCKING DOLLARS to see a movie and 10 dollars and 9 dollars for a pop and that’s a SMALL!! Is it because Hollywood movies are so much more ‘worth it’ than 22 years ago FUCK NO!! It’s because Hollywood is full of spoiled brats demanding 30 million a picture so YOU pay for their salary too dumbass not that any of you RACIST bitches want to bitch about it gee wonder why. And neil I KNOW you’re not talking unless you REALLY want me to go there with Bundy,Speck,Bianchi,Gacy,Dahmer,Ridgeway,BTK,Manson,and countless brutal,vicious white fucks who have shot up businesses or THUGS who have shot up their schools because they were ‘pissed that day’. Or the DECADES of lynchings/barbecues/family picnics and burst the bubble you obviously live in in your little fantasy world where you shitstains can do NO WRONG even when that’s ALL you’re doing!!
April 4th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
See, that’s why no one will take you seriously, benihana (if that is your real name). ‘Druken’ isn’t a word.
April 4th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
i guess seal and heidi klum weren’t available.
April 4th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
Why the hell is it “racist” to compare a black man to an ape? It’s apparently not “racist” to compare a white man to an ape, as I’ve seen plenty of apt comparisons of Dubya and monkeys, he really does have a monkey face.
WERE ALL APES, DAMMIT. All colors of humans are apes and sometimes it’s stylish or funny or poignant to compare us to other animals with which we all share a common ancestor.
April 4th, 2008 at 11:27 pm
Here’s the thing..
LeBron looks hot and powerful. Giselle looks hot and Giselle-y. They are featured in a story about being hot and fit. So what’s the problem?
April 5th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
I would just like to point out that Gisele is NOT EVEN WHITE. She is Latina, from Brazil, and is a probably a big mix of every race.
April 5th, 2008 at 3:33 pm
speaking of racism, i think its assinine that they make a black history month, but no native american history month. Where is the Cherokee, Mohican, Cree, etc. time in the spotlight? Gone, as if we dont exist. I know that MLK day wasnt that long ago, but come on, I think Natives like myself are outraged that we get swept under the rug, like we dont exist.
A Cherokee, navajo, comanche speaking on behalf of whatever is left of tribal america.
At least black people get thier time to shine, native americans were an opressed culture too. (still are in a way, i.e. Trail of tears)
I am indifferent to black and white couples,some work and some wind up pushed down the stairs of three story buildings (the last tenet in this apartment was a white woman, pushed by her black husband down the stairs) I grew up with racism, unfortunately.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
If blacks would stop all the senseless violent crime then maybe there would be no racism.
April 5th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
I honestly wonder what Vogue was trying to accomplish with this cover. Were they trying to entice black people to buy the issue? I think it is in bad taste really. If it were a white ball player (ha ha) and a black supermodel, it’d be equally confusing. Hell, I am black and I don’t read Vogue..putting Labron James on the front wouldn’t entice me. Nor would Naomi Campbell and some other white athlete on the cover have me rushing to split the pages.
Vogue is for wanna-be divas and gay men.
April 7th, 2008 at 3:30 pm
Wow! That Benihana really needs to drink de-caf. He/she/it is the one living in a fantasy world. It’s not racism, you pinheaded prick! It’s REALISM! Sure, all the whitey sicko fucks you mentioned are abhorrent human excrement. No one ever said they weren’t. All the incoherent ranting you went through just now doesn’t change the fact that savage behavior seems to be the rule. Not the exception. Why don’t you “go there” and get educated. And for the benefit of everyone out there who reads your third grade level posting, learn how to type!
Here’s your first lesson:
Blacks murder more than 1,600 whites each year.
Blacks murder whites at 18 times the rate whites murder blacks.
Blacks murdered, raped, robbed, or assaulted about one million whites in 1992.
In the last 30 years, blacks committed 170 million violent and non-violent crimes against whites.
Blacks under 18 are more than 12 times more likely to be arrested for murder than whites under 18.
About 90% of the victims of interracial crimes are white.
Blacks commit 7.5 times more violent interracial crimes than whites, although whites outnumber blacks by 7 to 1.
On a per capita basis, blacks commit 50 times more violent crime than whites.
Black neighborhoods are 35 times more violent than white neighborhoods.
Of the 27 million nonviolent robberies in 1992, 31% (8.4 million) were committed by blacks against whites. Less than 2% were committed by whites against blacks.
Of the 6.6 million violent crimes, 20% (1.3 million) were interracial.
Of the the 1.3 million interracial violent crimes, 90% (1.17 million) are black against white.
In the past 20 years, violent crime increased four times faster than the population.
In the last 30 years (1964-94), more than 45,000 people were killed in interracial murders compared to 38,000 killed in Korea and 58,000 in Vietnam.
Now, what was this about white thugs? Do the math! If you are even capable of understanding the basic principles of math! Even a festering pustule like you should be able to figure it out.
April 8th, 2008 at 1:56 am
Who isn’t afraid of black people?!
Just LOOK at what this black dude is doing to this white angel!
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=9&sku=ENGL-CD00426
April 8th, 2008 at 1:57 am
What about Michael Jackson and little white children?!
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=19&sku=ENGL-CD00284
April 8th, 2008 at 1:58 am
Holy fuck! For that matter… what about Anna Nicole’s tampon?!?!?!?
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=19&sku=ENGL-CD00415
April 8th, 2008 at 2:00 am
Or how about this guy for being more responsible for killing more blacks in the past 7 years than anybody:
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=18&sku=ENGL-CD00332
April 8th, 2008 at 10:24 am
Blacks can have our white women…. I’m doing children.
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=15&sku=ENGL-CD00266
April 8th, 2008 at 10:25 am
I’m doing guys that do children!
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=7&sku=ENGL-CD00306
April 8th, 2008 at 9:03 pm
When will you learn that you cant ever take anything seriously here?
c’mon…its CRACKED.com……lol.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:22 pm
I don’t mind ‘Black History Month’ let them have their fun. We get the other 11 months!!!
Bwwaahahahahahahahaha!
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=15&catid=24&sku=E-CD00292
(send your favorite White Supremacist that for his Birthday).
April 9th, 2008 at 1:40 am
What with all that break-dancing, stealing, raping, in-breeding and eating chicken that black people do, I wouldn’t have figured they would have the time to commit all those crimes against us nice white folk.
OK…my turn to make fun of blind (black) people then:
http://neilsnotes.com/index.php?page=13&catid=19&sku=ENGL-CD00256
April 10th, 2008 at 12:54 am
Christ Almighty, is there anything more tedious in contemporary society than people fully losing their shit about perceived “RACISM!!!” and the attendant claptrap that proceeds?
This article is the PC Sanctimony version of “SAN DIMAS HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL RULES!!!”
April 10th, 2008 at 7:11 am
[…] that we didn’t get a nomination. I’ve spent a year with this site. We’ve had compelling social commentary, wildly popular videos, and articles that challenge the lies you were taught in high school. So […]
April 10th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
No actual knowledge here, but with a name like Gisele Bundchen, and the fact that so many many Germans emigrated to South America during and after WWII, she probably isn’t Latina at all, but purebred Aryan.
April 14th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Get a life. All of you! You just fell face first into Vogue’s “knock, knock, who’s there”? trick. Every time this happens, you just validate their manipulation of an incredibly naive and stupid customer base.
April 14th, 2008 at 10:02 pm
You know who should really be mad about this cover? Giselle. For picking the photo that has her making the most awkwardly retarded face. I didn’t know I could feel so uncomfortable when looking at someone who is, almost always, very beautiful. Don’t get me wrong, she still is amazing. She just looks a tad bit on the contorted side.
April 15th, 2008 at 11:24 am
I find it ironic that you scoff at the cover’s stereotype against black men, but list as its redeeming factor the stereotype of women being nothing more than pretty things to look at or play with. (”First, in defense of the image… Gisele’s dress, particularly the way that it sort of sits on Gisele’s body like that, while also looking like it might fall off at a moments notice.”)
I agree that racism is a big problem, but have you forgotten that black men got the vote before white women? Both are equally important, and it’s foolish to stand up for one while putting down another (”Gisele needs to put on more clothing and stand in a dominant, controlled pose to show the big scary black man who is in charge. Plus, if she’s feeling really kind today, she and Minnie Mouse should teach black man how to make friends…).
In your own words: “to invoke a very real, very important social problem, then offer no useful words on the subject? It’s hackery.”
April 16th, 2008 at 5:11 am
Aren’t Brazilian ppl like part African/Hispanic? So if you get a nose job and bang rich white guys by default you become white?
April 24th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
http://watchingthewatchers.org/news/1378/annie-leibovitz-monkeys-around-lebron
do you like stealing articles Chris??
you should be burned at the stake you thief
April 30th, 2008 at 8:29 am
death to all pale faces