The Poor Sportsmen of the Year for 2006

It was another banner year for sports in 2006. Barry Bonds passed Babe Ruth on the all time home run list, only to be booed mercilessly for doing so. Barbaro seemed poised to be the first horse to win the Triple Crown in 18 years, but then broke his leg in the opening seconds of the Preakness Stakes and barely avoided an on-the-spot execution.

The Winter Olympics made their quadrennial appearance, but were overshadowed by Bode Miller’s drug scandal. Terrell Owens tried to kill himself—uh, allegedly—and then capped off his year by spitting in an opponent’s face. And, to really get people in that Christmas spirit, George Karl called Isaiah Thomas a “jerk” and an “asshole” after their two teams brawled in mid-December at Madison Square Garden.

Great. And these were just the tip of the iceberg. Here, we honor the cream of the crop—those athletes and other sports-related figures who did their best in 2006 to embarrass themselves, to bring shame upon their families, to let their teams down, and to stain the honor and dignity of their respective sports.

10. Joe Cullen

We start our list with what is, at least to our knowledge, a new crime in the annals of sports misbehavior: driving while nude. On the night of August 24th, Detroit Lions Defensive Line Coach Joe Cullen pulled his SUV up to Wendy’s and picked up his burger, fries and Coke totally naked.

“The suspect did nothing obscene, other than being naked at the drive-thru,” said the Wendy’s employee who called the cops on him. Toss in the fact that a week later Cullen was arrested for drunk driving—clothed, unfortunately—and we’ve got a budding star on our hands.

9. OJ Simpson

It’s good to see OJ back on track, isn’t it? After keeping mostly quiet for the past few years, The Juice returned to the scene this past November and hit a new low by agreeing to a $3 million joint book and TV special about the murders of Ron and Nicole, entitled “If I Did It, Here’s How It Happened.”

Unfortunately, FOX and Regan Books caved to public pressure and cancelled the deal—meaning now we’ll never know how OJ would have done it, although we can probably safely assume it involved knifing two people to death.

19 Comments

Kazelnum

Hi webmaster!

Posted on 3/22/2008 11:13:18 AM

Jeebus, the Well Hung Messiah

2007 was even worse... and 2008 is getting to be even better... I bet you could do an entire article on wrestlers that have really screwed the pooch....This is what happen when you pay a bunch of illiterate thugs loads of money, for playing a kid's game. They are no heroes...simply overpaid clowns, whose job is to entertain, no different than the animals at the zoo. Sports is filled with greedy, subhuman self-absorbed filth...the most vile and disgusting of all animals...except muslims and other scum like that.

Posted on 2/27/2008 10:51:09 AM

America > YOU

lol Undertaker, thats just cause your sports stars suck and have to maintain a good public view. Ours are just gods and we love them weather they murder or get doped up, ahhh the pleasures of being better then you! :P In case you can't sence my sarcasm I am kidding. However what is with the all the American bashing. Seems like all these morons just want to say something negative about us just because we are American. Penis envy maybe? I don't know...

Posted on 2/7/2008 3:21:33 PM

Arthur Dent

Why not have an "Asshole Of The Day" Cracked?

Posted on 2/1/2008 8:30:12 AM

The Undertaker

I must say bravo to all your Amercian sporting hero's. Coming from the land of Oz which is Australia to those who couldn't work it out. I can say that we might be behind the times as some of you would put it but our sporting hero's dont get busted on drugs, guns, driving naked, letting there 9mm go off in the air, and generally act like ratbags. I will be the first to say the canterbury bulldogs player's where twice accuseed of rape but was later to be found it had came from a get rich quick person and of cause our cyclist team being done on roids. But when you compare the two they are chalk and cheese by the sounds of OJ isn't the only insane sportsperson running a round driving a SUV.

Posted on 1/22/2008 7:05:04 PM

unknown

Hey toma! Just fuck off, OK?

Posted on 12/15/2007 10:52:19 PM

toma

haw-haw, i just heard a slur that he was pampered by a rich woman who he met on sugarmommymeet.com where rich women find their sugar babies.

Posted on 12/7/2007 1:36:21 AM

Skwizgar

"The Dutch are scum."

Posted on 12/3/2007 5:41:41 PM

That Guy

Hey Jon, the dickhead who said all Italians are scum, u better learn to b a little more "racially sensitive." Before a bunch of Italians show up at ur house and give u the beating u deserve

Posted on 11/26/2007 1:47:11 PM

jgrim9020

chris beniot was in 2007

Posted on 11/16/2007 9:48:31 PM

Gudvin,Gudvin

Hello, my name is Gudvin, I like yours blog.,Hello, my name is Gudvin, I like yours blog.

Posted on 11/11/2007 11:58:14 PM

superhobo

Materazzi deserves the first spot.

Posted on 11/4/2007 4:43:28 AM

STLBrian

What about Chris Benoit? The guy killed his family for crap's sake!

Posted on 11/3/2007 12:12:27 AM

Jon

Materazzi is such a cunt, all italians are scum

Posted on 11/2/2007 4:45:57 AM

Jim

Not to mention Materazzi said "I'd rather have your sister" and if you want to talk repeat offender, Zidane's done a few stupid things in his career

Posted on 10/29/2007 4:56:55 AM

why the hell did you put materazzi.... so what if he uttered words calling mother whore or whatever.... its sports!!! its called fuckin with their head. you piss them off, and take them off their game.... zidane is the poor sport and the baby. get it straight

Posted on 10/27/2007 11:28:00 AM

Gigaknight

Materazzi is good, but why not drop Wayne Rooney in there too? I mean stamping on some poor Portuguese player's nuts in the middle of a game? That deserves some kind of scorn.

Posted on 10/25/2007 5:21:18 PM

swiss

I'm glad its Materazzi instead of Zizou on the list. Materazzi is known to mistaken heads for balls in the A series, resulting in many a facial drop kicks....in football...

Posted on 10/23/2007 8:35:00 AM

ppppp

moveeeeee

Posted on 10/18/2007 2:28:45 PM

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The Poor Sportsmen of the Year for 2006

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