Prediction 4 A player or Coach's mind-numbingly boring back-story will be reported to death.
This is typically accomplished via slickly made pre-game propaganda, usually involving the player/coach, teeth clenched against the wind and eyes moist with stoic slow-mo determination, repeatedly saying that his team never gave up despite a ridiculously sentimental montage of personal tragedy and overwhelming odds. For best results cram in a flag, an eagle soaring over mountain tops, a shot of the coach greeting a sunrise with bravery, and if possible a wheelchair-ridden family member who never stopped believing in his brother (son/grandfather/first cousin on his mother's side).
A broad spectrum of players has received this treatment in recent years: Terrell Owens (played with an injury), Kurt Warner (bagged groceries, married an ugly woman) and Tom Brady (was born so achingly handsome that he makes Bill Belicheck question his sexuality). However, no story will ever rival Super Bowl XL's "Jerome Bettis Goes Home to Detroit," which was mentioned on ESPN every 30 seconds for the entire week leading up to the game.
Odds There Will Be Another "Bettis Homecoming" in Super Bowl XLI: 23:1
For the media, this story represented what alcoholics refer to as "rock bottom." However, there's an outside chance that the whole "Tony Dungy and Lovie Smith are friends!!!!!" angle might just get there.