The Five Most Unintentionally Funny Albums of 2006
1. Inhuman Rampage by Dragon Force
This is DragonForce.
To truly illustrate just how cliché these guys really are, I took a look at the lyrics from DragonForce's recent eight-song epic album, Inhuman Rampage, and here's what I found:
Even with all the references to battles of steel and the burning of fire and flames, it's still pretty impressive that DragonForce was able to use the word "pain" an incredible 26 times in only eight songs (and that doesn't even count how many times it's repeated in the chorus). After listening to the lead singer's voice and watching their videos, it's most surprising that the word "pussy" doesn't appear once. That word was apparently not included with the Dungeons and Dragons magnetic poetry set the band used to write their lyrics.
Check out this video for more DragonForce hilarity:
lol @ all the offended My Chem fans. it's an opinion article. on the internet. on a comedy site. relax.
ReplyWow, someone CLEARLY has a personal beef with MCR and just threw them in there as a 'fuck you'. That's low, man. Just stop.
ReplyI was thinking the same thing. :s
Or the fact that they suck :3
Dragon force is not metal.
ReplyI am forced to render my compliments, Messers Glick and Newman, both for writing a wonderful article calling out five shitty, obnoxious bands, and for doing so in such a fashion that butthurt fans are still whining about it five years later. Bravo!
ReplyDRAGONFORCE EPIC XD
ReplyI'm not a fan of any of these bands, but it feels like you just threw in MCR to make it to five.
ReplyWhereas the other four were just pretty unusual, number one was "I don't like these guys, so go f**k yourself!"
Again, I don't listen to any of the music mentioned, but this article was awful.
"Number one was 'I don't like these guys, so go f**k yourself!' "
I'm 100% with this, by the way. That was the exact feeling I got reading this.
Ironic cos Brian May performed with MCR at Reading Festival this year :)
ReplySeems like you don't know the meaning of the word "ironic"
Sounds like someone missed the article on word misuse.
jibbs reminds me of chugo
Replymars volta is good...i understand the trollness of this article but have you listened to the album de-loused in the comatorium?
Replyi like them too, but that does not discount the hilarity and truthfulness of the article
I fuckin' love Deloused... Everything else was kinda MEH.
But seriously, as a fan, I still ask.. What the f**k do any of these lyrics even mean? "exo-skeletal judgement de railroad tonight?" wtf, bro?
5 years later and people are still butthurt? Successful troll is so successful he has stolen all others' success.
ReplyMessers Glick and Newman, awsome trolling was awsome.
ReplyHaving once been a sniveling, severely fucked up, 19 year old circa The Black Parade, I can legally say MCR saved my life. There's something about that shred of rawness beneath the confetti, pyro, and overproduced sheen that worked miracles for a lot of kids like me.
Reply Hide All See All 6 RepliesI love you so much.
i hope you don't breed
I should have worn a condom.
I'm in an awkward position here, wearing a Red Fang shirt I got at a concert headlined by Mastodon and defending My Chemical Romance. But, let's jump into it.
The Black Parade is the logical next step for a band with two albums out. The deepening of lyrical themes (Death, basically), the different song structures, incorporating more genres, etc. Sure the lyrics were a relatively immature look at death, and the song structures weren't insane, but it's a band experimenting with their sound, which really rarely happens these days.
Glad you're still here to comment and read, Andrea.
I liked their first album. Everything else was MEH.
You don't have to associate listening to MCR with being a "sniveling teenager" to appease the f*****g troll. Don't meet those stupid fucks halfway, they're not people.
Every pretentious, stuck up piece of s**t who was born into happy circumstances will stick their nose up at you for needing a band who understands your unhappiness in the s****y situation you got shafted with.
They don't actually have inner strength, they just sit there with their fortunate lives telling everyone else its as easy as "getting over it."
Know why? Because the concept that being born in unhappy conditions with terrible parents and a terrible life is too complicated to fit in their atrophied brain.
Go eat s**t die, trolls. MCR is real and speaks from the heart to people who are capable of deciphering their message.
Here's a summary of everything you have to say: "hahar emo lol f*g whiny lolol. I'm no better than anyone else, but that sure doesn't stop me from looking down on everyone to protect my tiny little self esteem. I'm such a cool guy."
Go pick up something sharp and run into it.
first of all, dragonforce is all about tongue-in-cheek irony. but the author of this obviously didn't get that. also they have pretty rockin guitars.
Reply Hide All See All 3 Repliessecond, the mars volta is a good band. they're just different. prog rock isn't for everyone, and liking it doesn't make you "pretentious and transparent" (although i'll give you that that probably is true about a decent percentage of the fans). although sometimes liking prog rock DOES mean you're stoned. and cedric's lyrical style is impressionistic. yes, it rarely means anything coherent but it's meant to conjure images in your imagination, not necessarily to pin down concrete concepts (such as my chemical romance's "i'm in high school and my feelings matter")
The guitars are only great if you've never seen them live, and if you've never played guitar. They are literally some of the worst composers and technical players ever to be lauded as 'good'. The only thing they have going for them is that Herman Li is a reasonably good blues player...I'm serious.
that bassist is crazy good, and while i want to know how to make whatever that sound the guitarist is making, come on, the bassist is outdoing you. no shame though, I consider myself pretty good on guitar but that bassist could play circles around me.
I was impressed by the guitar playing when I first listened to them and first saw the Through The Fire And The Flames video. then I saw a video of them actually playing. DragonForce sucks.
Anyone who "likes" Mars Volta is pretentious and transparent.
ReplyI agree, shallow and pedantic.
It's nice every so often when the author is hate-trolling and most of the comments call him out :) You people make me smile.
ReplyP.S. @bi-polarbear: Maybe listen to a song or two before making fun. Being familiar with most of their music, I can say with confidence that you've never heard it or are clinically retarded.
Also, strongly consider jumping off the "call everyone who expresses their emotions creatively a petty high-schooler" bandwagon.
The problem is that the only emotion that they express is "I am a whiny bitch."
Hey, guess what buddy? You're a f*****g d*****t faggot. Why don't you go tell your d*****t faggot friends about how cool you are for not feeling things?
I think I'm pretty f*****g qualified to inform you that you're wrong, what with the fact that I know every lyric of every one of their songs by heart.
Don't post in this topic again. I will f*****g destroy you, troll.
Agreed with LVenom that the article should be renamed "Shoving Our Opinion onto Unsuspecting Readers."
ReplyI laughed at the DragonForce and Jibbs jokes though.
This is the downside of letting anyone write for Cracked. It's true that some of these bands aren't great, but it really feels that this was written by a troll.
ReplyMy chemical bromance . Sample lyric . " I'm in high school and my feelings matter . "
ReplyOoh this article was just one big troll for Cracked readers.
ReplySo where's the "hilarious" we were promised. Mildly amusing at best, annoying at worst.
Reply