The 9 Biggest Wusses in Rock Today
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Let’s be honest, there were some pretty amazing rockers who were also mega-wusses like Freddie Mercury and Prince. But we put up with it because those guys could kick ass musically. Sadly, today we have a class of rockers that might have inherited Elton John’s style but certainly not his talent. This new generation of pussiness must be stopped, for the sake of the ears and eyes of music fans everywhere so CRACKED is outing the biggest wusses in rock today. The Smashing Pumpkins’ Billy Corgan and James Iha Chris Cornell
 Aside from being a wimp who makes music for car commercials, this guy is the living embodiment of the uber-liberals that give Democrats a bad name. When he’s not entertaining clueless baby boomers at MoveOn.org events, he’s busy writing liner notes that lecture you about the joys of veganism. Speaking of veganism, his hairless pale, fragile frame looks like he hasn’t ingested any iron in years. Belle & Sebastian
 Yes indie dorks and twee-lovers, even we admit their lyrics are smart, they’re good song writers. But come on people, their songs sound like kittens purring into a microphone! These guys are so wimpy they make Bert and Ernie look like M.O.P. They make a child’s tea party look like a public beheading. |
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:( I love Belle & Sebastian and Voxtrot. Granted, I can see how they made this list, ..well that's about it. I like them, but I definitely see how they made the list, hah.
oh god zwan! XD worst cd i ever bought all their song were uber-long! guh.
I can explain how Voxtrot survived Austin, Texas. Austin is the complete opposite of everything Texas is known for, and is SWARMING with hipster indie douchebags just like these guys. Not only would they survive here.... they'd THRIVE here.
f**k Sufjan, Cat Stevens is a wuss.
And you're forgetting the king of all wusses. The one and only, evermopey, never-leaves-home-without-making-sure-there's-sand-in-his-vagina-to-cry-about-in-some-s****y-song, Ben Gibbard of death cab for cutie. He somehow made singing just soft enough to be drowned out by the instrumentals cool. And the lyrics are like a tangent of interlinking thoughts plucked from the head of a child with severe attention deficit disorder, hopping from one idea to another with effectively no transition in most cases.
"There things take my time and energy
Don't stand too close without apologies
Cutthroat; cut out candid glimpses and
Wind me up; i'm ready
Can't escape this line of best fit
I remember being inside something more than you..."
What the f**k? And I know girls who think this guy is the greatest songwriter of all time. Leonard Cohen should smack him in his pouting face with a mallet.
@BB815
Emo is short for "Emotive Hardcore" not "Emotional"
Jus so you know.
@ks6621,
Devin Townshend could start a band with everyone here, and his influence alone would make it hardcore
@greenhaze,
Because Michael Jackson danced around grabbing his c**k and singing about kicking people's asses and zombies apocalypses. As effeminate as he was, there's just no denying how incredibly badass he was to balance it all out
Panic at the Disco's douche level went from "dangerously douchey" to "somewhat tolerable" when they dropped the exclamation point and the guyliner with their second album.
That Panic at the Disco picture is so f*****g hilarious I don't actually believe it's real. It just looks so photoshopped. Especially the skinny girl-boy, all the way to the right...
Why isn't Michael Jackson on this list? He's effemminate.
BB815, you're an absolute idiot. Emo was a hardcore spin off. Think Rites of Spring or whatever. Bright eyes and that Indian chap aren't emo, they're singer songwriters. Stop talking s**t brah
hm i agree that some of these people should be on this list
conor oberst is my favorite musician and i like to dream we're spooning
but i do find his lyrics really good
his voice could use some fixing but i like it just the way it is
you should make fun of scene people and theyre noise
I don't care if Panic! is pansy, I like them. So nyah.
I'm going to kidnap Billy Corgan, Sufjan Stevens and everyone else on this list, tie them up and force them to listen to Strapping Young Lad, Clutch, Blade of the Ripper, Destruct A Thon and Scissorfight
I absolutely adore Brandon Flowers. I'd be his groupie whore any day. I like Oberst, but I definitely agree that he is a totally puss.
Most bands with members under 30 are incredible pussies. It used to be the other way around. What happened?
That's right, the hippies from the sixties had kids and they grew to be even more delicate and p***y than their worthless parents.
I like Oberst, Belle & Sebastian, Smashing Pumpkins and the Killers. But then again I am likely a p***y.
Democrats give themselves bad names. Go go, communist healthcare.
i like bright eyes. and I guess whoever made this was too much of a fan of fallout boy to put them on here...
How pathetic is it that my two favorite singers - Conor & Sufjan - are both on this list? And that I used to adore Moby & Chris? I am really pathetic.
Meh.
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And BB815 is an IDIOT.