8 Summer Blockbusters Guaranteed to Disappoint
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We know what you're thinking: "Wait, the summer movie season isn't over yet?" Nope. In fact, we're barely at the halfway mark. But with the current pump-'em-out weekly blockbuster release pace, and the frenetic advertising carpet-bombing we've endured for each, you'd be forgiven for wishing it was September already. And hey, why shouldn't it be? Below, we've taken a look at the rest of the summer blockbuster crop, and given some compelling reasons why you should stay indoors until September. #1.
Live Free or Die Hard (June 27)
The Case For: Maybe we're just burned out on all the pasty twentysomethings named "Tobey" and "Skeet" starring in our action movies for the last decade, all of whom look like Bruce Willis could bench-press them while eating a sandwich, but we'll come right out and say it: We miss invulnerable supercop John McClane. We would like to see this man drive a car into a helicopter. The Case Against: Twelve years ago, Willis couldn't make Die Hard: With a Vengeance work as a buddy cop flick with a genuine badass like Samuel L. Jackson. It'd be nothing short of a miracle if he manages to pull it off with hipster doofus Justin Long, a sassy kidnapped daughter, and a PG-13 rating here. Verdict: "Hi! I'm an aging action star with no real grasp on the basis of his fans' love for his own franchise!"
"And I'm a Mac!" If We'd Made It: We'd have cast Bruce's real-life daughter Rumer Willis as Lucy McClane and his ex-wife's young new husband Ashton Kutcher as her lover. You'd get to spend the whole two hours watching Bruce Willis slowly going legitimately insane, and they probably would have had to finish the movie with body doubles after he finally snapped and beat Kutcher to death in the middle of filming. |
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if you NEVER grew up wit the transformers cartoon, then i guess transformers was an okay movie, but NOTHING like the original
The most disappointing thing about Transformers? They got Hugo Weaving to voice Megatron. What's the point of getting HUGO WEAVING'S VOICE WHICH IS AMAZING AND AWESOME IN EVERY WAY if you're just going to throw so many filters over it that it doesn't f*****g sound like Hugo Weaving anymore? Like, at all? Not even like Robot Hugo Weaving? Seriously, the only reason I watched that movie in the first place is Hugo Weaving.
Article is wrong in every way
Well, he was right about one thing: Transformers was f*****g terrible. You can't have a movie about giant fighting robots that revolves around Shia LeBoeuf and those same supposedly kickass robots hiding from his parents.
nothing but f*****g fanboys that will never be happy with anything that comes out. just re release the original starwars trilogy and couple indiana jones films and that should shut up anyone who goes on and on about this s**t.
simpsons movie = s**t
Sarah, that's the point : in any given trilogy one of the movies will suck. For Indiana Jones it was number 2.
By the way, as expected, the Simpson movie was nothing but a two part episode put end to end.
I thought "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade" was the 3rd installment... and was better than the godawful Temple of Doom...
SarahYES!!!, TAKE THAT,SIMPSONS MOVIE!
YES!!!, TAKE THAT,SIMPSONS MOVIE!
watch full movies anime tv and cartoons at http://www.tvokay.com it is free for you to stream and download......check it out
This is good movies and music is vies vies goodLicence to wed wasn't that great but Robin Williams is still an amazing actor. He is one of my favourites.
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unknownI'm a lier. I hadn't seen the movie yet when I made my first post. Transformers was great. The entire second half of the movie is giant robot fights which include swords, decapitation, guns, missles, lazers, and the best CGI implemented in a film to date. I appologize for being an idiot.
JamesTransformers was spot on, Bourne ultimatum couldn't be any more off. Bourne Ultimatum was probably the best third installment of a movie i've ever seen. Transformers was the most awful s**t i've seen in my life. To anyone that hasn't seen transformers, Remember when you cringed during the scene in jurassic park where the little girl "hacks" the computer? I got that same cringe-induced expression of horror for 2 straight hours during Transformers. And to really pile teh s**t on, it featured at least 45 minutes of dialogue regarding the even steven's kid and his romantic interest.
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The Bourne Ultimatum turned out to be epic though.