The Top 10 Secret Celebrity Scientologists

#8: BECK: SCIENTOLOGIST

Best Known For: being in possession of two turntables and a microphone; being able to identify a good drum break; being the hippest white boy in the room.

Why You Wouldn't Expect Him To Be a Scientologist: The Reverend of Electric Soul, genre-hopping creator of esoteric and complex albums--doesn't Beck seem a bit too ironically hip to believe in something as goddamn ridiculous as Scientology without putting quote gestures around it and talking about it through a voice synthesizer first?

While he never came out about his beliefs until 2005, Beck is actually a second-generation Scientologist; there are a multitude of conspiracy theories online that both he and his record label tried to conceal his Scientologist leanings for most of his career. Clearly the label didn't want anybody to think that Beck, a 100-pound Fraggle who writes acoustic guitar raps about plastic eyeballs spray-painting vegetables, was weird or anything.

Connections: Beck's mother was the midwife for the birth of pasty-faced actor/second generation Scientologist Giovanni Ribisi (The Mod Squad, Saving Private Ryan) and his twin sister Marissa.

Beck is now married to Marissa, the mother of his son "Cosimo Henri." As of this writing they're expecting another one, who'll probably get an even more retarded name, if that's possible. (See also: Jason Lee's son "Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf Lee"; "Suri")

Presumed Operating Thetan Level: 7 or higher (able to audit self and "address the primary cause of amnesia"; according to Wikipedia, graduation from this level requires a $100,000 payment)

Recommended For Your Pleasure

To turn on reply notifications, click here

965 Comments

The Cracked Podcast

Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!