5 Insane Supervillain Schemes by Real Governments 5 Things Nobody Tells You About Breeding Endangered Animals 4 Lame Jokes You Start Telling as Soon as You Become a Dad

Top Picks for November

Some of the best stuff from around the web and the Cracked.com Mirth Canal.

11.27.2009

How you likely spent your Thanksgiving: [College Humor]

Hipster Pilgrims: [Huffington Post]

"I know I shouldn't take your small pox... but you're just so damn cute": [Comedy.com]

Pilgrims, Indians and Thanksgiving Hotness: [Gunaxin]

A brief history of pie: [Fark]

The AM Holiday Gift Guide: [Ask Men]

Kid's reaction to this present is baffling, to say the least: [I Am Bored]

Zombies + Hookers + Christmas = Awesome: [Adult Swim]

How to survive Black Friday: [lemondrop]

The Cracked.com Topic Generator: [Daisy Owl]
Thanks to Driscoll in the Mirth Canal.

Man vs. Toddler: The Final Battle: [Huffington Post]

Nothing like a little Turkey Porn to make you feel good about last night's meal (slightly NSFW): [Liquid Generation]

Your Last Supper: 10 Food That Could Kill You Dead: [Asylum]

Poca-Hotness 2009: [COED Magazine]

The 50 Best Inventions of 2009: [TIME]
Thanks to Nicol in the Mirth Canal.

A little leftover douchebag: [The Chive]

Jeri Lynn can bast our turkey anytime (like, for real, because we don't know how to): [Gorilla Mask]

Rock Band: Yoko Ono: [College Humor]

What to get your mom this holiday season: [The Frisky]

8 Martial Arts Masters That Changed Cinema: [Mania]

Cincy's cheerleading squad: [Uncoached]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Hamster racing!
Submitted by lethmio in the Mirth Canal.

If you want to find out what we're looking at online before we post it here, be sure to follow us on Twitter and become our fan on Facebook.

11.24.2009

How heavy is the Internet? "... on top of it all, an otter [is] screaming pointlessly.": [CNET]
Thanks to Considerable in the Mirth Canal.

11 Dirty TV Moments That Slipped Past the Censors: [11Points]

The Craziest Japanese Game Shows of All Time: [Huffington Post]

Helpful Tips to Avoid Being "That Guy" at Thanksgiving Dinner: [Gunaxin]

Is there a wrong way to eat a Reese's?: [College Humor]

Dog vs. squirrel, guess who wins?: [I Am Bored]

We all know where Brockway will be this Thanksgiving: [Ask Men]

Get these adorable assassins on your iPhone: [Adult Swim]

Immediately after this photo, these cats shaved each other's fur off: [Funny Pictures]

Buddy the Elf strikes again: [lemondrop]

Prepare to get ptero-ed a new asshole: [Pterodactyl]
Thanks to Stan the Garbage Man in the Mirth Canal.

Right in your goddamn face, Paula: [Liquid Generation]

Books you should read: [Asylum]

Awesome Elevator Ads: [Huffington Post]

Apparently kangaroos are the biggest jerks on the planet: [Fox News]
Submitted by Tyler.

There's a lot of questionable parenting going on in these pics: [The Chive]

Photoshop this commission's news conference:[Fark]

Star Wars Facebook status updates: [College Humor]

Ladies: This is what you can buy your man-friends: [The Frisky]

The Victoria's Secret afterparty that we attended (in our minds): [COED Magazine]

Dirty Dozen: The 12 Hottest Villains in Comics: [Mania]

That's a lovely... nothing you have on there (NSFW): [Gorilla Mask]

15 Examples of Really Bad Tie-In Merchandising: [Uncoached]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Free Barbie!
Submitted by Demha in the Mirth Canal.

11.19.2009

How will you celebrate World Toilet Day?: [Asylum]

The "Poker Face"-Off (Featuring Lady Gaga, Christopher Walken and Eric Cartman): [Huffington Post]

11 Awesomely Creative Billboards: [Huffington Post]

Deleted scenes from Paranormal Activity: [College Humor]

Vote for 2010's Top 99 Women: [Ask Men]

Dethklok joins a Dethklok tribute band: [Adult Swim]

Six Awesome TV Characters Who Need Their Own Shows: [Gunaxin]

Family Guy: Meg's best moments: [Comedy.com]

Google auto-fill never disappoints: [I Am Bored]

11 Random Observations Outside the New Moon Premiere: [11Points]

Singing telegrams have hit the Internet: [lemondrop]

An underwater river. You read that right: [The Chive]

Have you ever wanted to learn kung fu from a hillbilly? Well, now's your chance!: [YouTube]
Submitted by Hendrix.

UPS's employee manual: [College Humor]

10 Sexiest Cinematic Bloodsuckers: [Liquid Generation]

10 Ridiculous Lady Laws That Are Still On The Books: [The Frisky]

This Thanksgiving, we'll have plenty to be thankful for: [COED Magazine]

What Kind of Racist Are You?: [Mad Atoms]
Thanks to supra-man in the Mirth Canal.

7 Rules for Making The Hobbit: [Mania]

Straight out of the WTF File: An 11-year-old gives birth... on her wedding day:[Fark]

What interesting... "tattoos" you have: [Gorilla Mask]

Videos of people on roller coasters: [Uncoached]

Kellogg is experiencing an Eggo shortage. In office news, David Wong mysteriously gained 50-pounds in three weeks: [Yahoo! News]
Thanks to Chronicles in the Mirth Canal.

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A list of every website that responds to the Konami Code.
Submitted by ralf23 in the Mirth Canal.

11.17.2009

11 Craziest Japanese PSAs Ever: [Huffington Post]

Unforgettable Ads of This Past Decade: [AdWeek]
Submitted by PJ.

Twilight: Three Wolf Moon: [College Humor]

The invisible man exists: [The Chive]

Bird ruins $2-million Bugatti: [Asylum]

Apparently dominoes are incredibly badass: [lemondrop]

11 Most Ridiculous Concert Demands By Hip-Hop Artists: [11Points]

Is this the greatest GPS device ever?: [Ask Men]

5 Minutes to Kill (Yourself) Wedding Day: [Adult Swim]

100 Great Quotes From The Wire in 10 Minutes: [Huffington Post]

Twitter Tells Users to Piss Off: [Geek Comedy]

Futbol goalie is owned in more ways than one: [College Humor]

Google's auto-fill gets called out: [AutoCompleteMe]
Submitted by Jennifer.

Note to parents and would-be parents: Don't get your child this: [I Am Bored]

The 30 Best Action Figures of the 80s: [Gunaxin]

7 Things You Should Never Go Cheap On: [COED Magazine]

Blond, brunette? It doesn't matter. Rebecca Lee makes it feel like summer in our pants either way: [Gorilla Mask]

That's quite the wiener: [Big Ass Hot Dog]
Thanks to Mr Gale in the Mirth Canal.

8 Annoying Television Characters: [Mania]

"I say Geoffrey, do you still own that crane?" "Why yes, Wilson, I believe I do... whatever do you ask for?" "No reason, just need to give the old verge a trim, if you know what I mean":[Fark]

Cracked.com takes no responsibility for the following (please don't come to our office, Mr. Van Damme): [Uncoached]

According to one dating site, Brits are incredibly ugly: [Yahoo! News]
Thanks to TechnoHawk in the Mirth Canal.

The 40-Year-Old virgin if he were a serial killer: [Liquid Generation]

Oh Oxford, how could you?: [The Frisky]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Just in case you needed to know every fictional cheetah, ever.
Submitted by Clearwater in the Mirth Canal.

If you want to find out what we're looking at online before we post it here, be sure to follow us on Twitter and become our fan on Facebook.

11.12.2009

Prank War 8: The Skydiving Prank: [College Humor]

Star Wars Gangsta Rap: [Huffington Post]

Carl Spackler's got game (that's Bill Murray for the uninformed): [lemondrop]

10 Best Shows Within Shows: [Adult Swim]

12 Creepiest YouTube Stars: [YouTube Comedy]

The most disturbing Google fill-in ever: [I Am Bored]

24 Photos of the Greatest Parents Ever: [The Chive]

The Google logo designer has some issues: [College Humor]

Turns out all that time we spent ogling Emma Frost was good for us: [Asylum]

4 Insane Tribal Sports You May Want to Try: [Gunaxin]

The 5 Biggest Marijuana Myths Debunked: [COED Magazine]

Mandy B reminds us why stars are so sexy: [Gorilla Mask]

Comic Strip Mashups: [ryandartist]
Thanks to GishFace in the Mirth Canal.

Spider-Man 4 Villain Revealed: [Mania]

Japan finally puts out something sexy that the rest of the world can enjoy:[Fark]

The Best of Tony Little: [Uncoached]

Shark-on-shark C-section. Our enemies of the deep are evolving every day: [NZ Herald]
Thanks to Basket Full of Kittens in the Mirth Canal.

Read this list and stop acting like a pussy: [Ask Men]

Separated At Birth: Politicians With Famous Look-Alikes : [Huffington Post]

Fill in the Blank: Homer Simpson: [Liquid Generation]

Famous Boyfriend Stealers: [The Frisky]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: The Tomb of Jesus has been found... in Japan?
Submitted by Clearwater in the Mirth Canal.

11.10.2009

7 Embarrassing First Strips from Legendary Cartoonists: [Geekpad Show]

Calvin is apparently Asian in real life: [Unreality]

Cracked.com's secret hideout: [The Chive]

New Mexico soccer player puts on impromptu try-out for the WWE: [Huffington Post]

If the octofox is ever discovered, we're escaping to the moon: [I Am Bored]

Ambiguous endings resolved: [College Humor]

Venture Bros.: Return to Malice: [Adult Swim]

Women the ladies over at Frisky wish would play for the other team: [The Frisky]

Tiffani Amber Thiessen is pregnant. We all just wept a little: [Asylum]

10 Superhot Superhero Girlfriends: [Mania]

Get ready for the throw-down of the century: Catholics just discovered that Scientology forces practitioners to have abortions:[Fark]

Wired's arachnid hall of fame, everyone else's nightmare fuel: [Wired]
Thanks to HyperGlavin in the Mirth Canal.

Gentlemen might want to sit down before checking out this link: [Gunaxin]

MacGruber: The complete collection: [Hilarious.net]
Thanks to Remora in the Mirth Canal.

Top 10 Doomsday Prophecies: [Ask Men]

Ricky Gervais is annoyed by everything: [Huffington Post]

Robots Can't Act: Pulp Fiction: [Liquid Generation]

Ridiculous Fitness Infomercials: [Uncoached]

The noblest woman on the planet... nah, just kidding: [lemondrop]

Grand Theft Frogger: [College Humor]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: Apparently the Norse were unsure of how to build a proper boat.
Submitted by Quagmar in the Mirth Canal.

11.06.2009

What your lady friend wants for Christmas: boob warmers! (Just trust us): [The Frisky]

The 17 Most Annoying Commercials of All Time: [Huffington Post]

Russians take Photoshop contests to a whole new level (minus the "shop" and plus the "guns"): [The Chive]

"Oh hey, 'sup, guys? A funeral, huh? For wh- why is my name on that tombstone?": [Asylum]

This guy makes 90k a year just by wearing T-shirts. In other news, Cracked interns quietly weep themselves sleep every night:[Fark]

We found this in Brockway's medicine cabinet: [I Am Bored]

The greatest butterfly there ever was: [College Humor]

Amateur Ninja Part II: [Adult Swim]

Hollywood is officially out of ideas: [Gunaxin]

Even further evidence that they've run out: [Mania]

Juggalo furries? The End of Days is upon us: [YouTube]
Thanks to skoora in the Mirth Canal.

10 Weirdest Sitcom Crossovers: [TV Munchies]

The Yankees may have won the World Series, but whose food was the best?: [Ask Men]

The Filipino Prisoners Present: Queen: [Huffington Post]

Mr. Miyagi returns from the grave: [Daily Breeze]
Thanks to Flyingsquid in the Mirth Canal.

Nobody believe Tiger when he said the green men were following him: [Uncoached]

How to survive a dry spell (of the sex variety): [lemondrop]

Six minutes of people doing stuff. Just... stuff (it's a slow news day): [College Humor]

Celebrity Phone Tap: Mel Gibson and Jesus H. Christ: [Liquid Generation]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day: A list of cats with unaccredited diplomas.
Submitted by Leifkillburn.

11.03.2009

Finally, a legitimate reason to grow a mustache: to fight cancer: [Asylum]

Cracked.com Craptions Contest before the Internet existed: [Black and WTF]
Thanks to BattleKitten in the Mirth Canal.

The best of Charlie Day's dance skills: [Huffington Post]

Carl weighs in on the World Series: [Adult Swim]

16 Robot Cats: [Geekpad Show]

The Sims Horror Movie: [College Humor]

The only Halloween party we cried about when we discovered we were not invited: [Ask Men]

Christopher Walken performs "Poker Face": [I Am Bored]

Bear kills two terrorists. Someone give that thing the Medal of Honor:[Fark]

The 15 Stupidest Products of All Time: [Huffington Post]

Four Hot Female Criminals: [Gunaxin]

10 Movies That Should Be in 3D (not included: Debbie Does Dallas): [Mania]

When Parties Go Wrong: A Facebook Tale: [College Humor]

Things went down hill for the Ewoks after the Battle of Endor ravaged their planet: [YouTube]
Thanks to sickandtired in the Mirth Canal.

The sexiest communists on the planet: [Uncoached]

We're not sure what Etsy is, but sign us up: [The Frisky]

The greatest sandwich in America: [lemondrop]

Escape from Scientology Land: [Liquid Generation]

American fatasses on scooters: [The Chive]

And finally, your insane Wikipedia page of the day (in honor of Movember): Notable mustaches throughout history.
Submit your page here.

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