Easiest Murder Mystery Ever [COMIC]

ok a) the dead thing is goomba, one of marios enemies b) mario is the killer as his usual method of getting rid of enemies if to stamp on them c)its not a massively funny comic and its not a declaration of political/religious/social belief, its just a quick laugh, stop taking it so damn seriously! d) no-one has complained about this yet but i thought i'd jump the gun anyway_ the goomba is not dead, he's fine, they took him to a goomba hospital where they found out he wasnt quite dead yet and he'll pull through, dont worry. also, mario will go away to a small prison cell where he will be raped every day for the rest of his life. chill.

10/19/2009 01:36:33 PM

Amner

I don't get it. And what the hell is the dead thing? It wasn't killed, it was mangled.

10/18/2009 02:28:22 AM

Superstar2559

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10/09/2009 05:01:13 AM

ned123

.... A little cranky today are we, gormster?

10/07/2009 12:13:16 PM

trichards011891

poorly drawn piece of s**t

10/06/2009 12:23:58 AM

gormster

Obviously, it's the man with the pipe, doing the talking. As you can see, his left hand is open, as if he was previously wielding a murder weapon, such as a knife. This leads to conclusions that he murdered the s**t-colored monster.

10/05/2009 03:59:05 PM

carterbsmith

The guy in wheelchair did it.

10/05/2009 04:39:11 AM

LiamA

This is just like Powerup Comics all over again.

10/04/2009 11:46:35 PM

lol_alf

My friends recommended me a very interesting place __ http://www.agelessfriends.com __ It's a nice and free place for Younger Women and Older Men, or Older Women and Younger Men, to interact with each other. Age gap is not a problem there. You may wanna check it out and tell your friends.

10/04/2009 07:10:01 PM

kaly76hummer

My friends recommended me a very interesting place __ http://www.AgelessFriends.com __ It's a nice and free place for Younger Women and Older Men, or Older Women and Younger Men, to interact with each other. Age gap is not a problem there. You may wanna check it out and tell your friends.

10/04/2009 07:09:32 PM

kaly76hummer

I just love how everyone over analyzes everything. I liked it.

10/04/2009 03:17:21 PM

malnormalish

Hey Zayro, are you the same zayro that played everquest from grand rapids michigan? sup mike.art is about seeing the world thru the artists eyes, everything else was me trying to be a gay douchebag.

10/04/2009 02:35:22 PM

Leperkhan

i loled

10/04/2009 12:56:52 PM

Obefiend

Never heard this one before!

10/04/2009 03:48:34 AM

soylent_robot

fail! thats all.

10/04/2009 02:26:21 AM

deimudda

Is it just me or does anyone else get the urge to roundhouse the midsection of these super anorexic corset figure chicks hoping that they'll split like a wooden board to a well placed karate chop?

10/03/2009 11:38:59 PM

magicalpants

Whatever. It's better than Fatawesome.

10/03/2009 09:51:17 PM

CaptainVideo

Pretty good artwork and I chuckled (whoever b***hes about the shading/light contrast just isn't familiar with film noire). Is there any way the site can block these f**king annoying spam messages. I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK WHAT YOU OFFER OR WHERE OR HOW, I KNOW HOW TO FUCKING SHOP FFS!!

10/03/2009 09:40:47 PM

typhoidzyphoid

Funny stuff. I approve.

10/03/2009 09:12:27 PM

JaundiceManatee

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10/03/2009 09:09:04 PM

qjgayv

I laughed.

10/03/2009 08:29:58 PM

eagle209

Jesus f**king christ. Why is it that every time a site has a comments page, people decide to pop a hemeroid and cuss the hell out of little things. If you don't like the comic, don't act like your mother will die if you don't inform the world about ho f**ktastically s**tty it was. Who draws your web comics? Leonardo Def**king Vinci? 3/5

10/03/2009 08:23:33 PM

DonovinT_T

#1 I laughed. I like it. #2 The guy can draw ten times better than I can so I'm not gonna be a dick and criticize the art work.

10/03/2009 08:14:43 PM

AtomicSpike

I didn't think it was too bad....i cracked a smile.

10/03/2009 07:23:42 PM

TheChav

Leperkhan, that's the stupidest f**king thing I've ever heard.

10/03/2009 07:18:16 PM

Zayro

To Dawnfall: I believe that it's quite obviosut hat years of devouring meal after meal after meal of greasy-ass fired chicken has given the good Colonel... SPINE CANCER (no, I'm pretty sure that's not real). Yep, that's right. KFC makes your spine a gigantic, bony growth of malignant nerve cells. Enjoy your Famous Bowl NOW, you lucky so-and-so!

10/03/2009 06:49:08 PM

angryscotsman93

What I dont get, is why Colonel Sanders is in a wheelchair....

10/03/2009 05:51:28 PM

Dawnfall

Clearly the guy in the wheelchair..... Heeeeeeeees faaaaakiin'

10/03/2009 05:45:54 PM

Welbanks

laaaaaame

10/03/2009 04:52:46 PM

Wasman

Thats the point.. It's supposed to be bad. I think.. I like it but I didn't laugh. :|

10/03/2009 04:50:27 PM

SockWizard

You can do better than feature this piece of s**t,Cracked.Truly the most awful comic strip on this site.

10/03/2009 04:38:21 PM

sugreev2001

What the f**k? This is simply terrible. Fucking awful. I don't usually comment if I don't like something but this is so obviously terrible I can't believe that it was chosen to be featured on this site. What the f**k.

10/03/2009 04:32:15 PM

mgwblue

haha Tartra, you finally misstepped.Art isn't about who is the most skilled, it is about seeing the world through the artists eyes.Therefore, there is no such thing as "best" or "worst" art. And for so long , you had me believing that you WERE classier than the rest of us.

10/03/2009 04:23:31 PM

Leperkhan

I think the drawing's okay, despite what some people say. The gradients are weird, but that's just his style. It's more clever than funny though. Made me think about whether Goombas had blood haha.

10/03/2009 03:22:43 PM

RevertSpecially

Not great, but still better than previous Cracked comics

10/03/2009 03:03:56 PM

Libertariandude

These just keep getting stupider. Featured webcomics are total cop outs. If we really wanted to look at these s**tty comics you could just put a link to this in the Cracked Round-Up. That way, we could go look at all of thier failed attempts at drawing, humor, or god forbid some combination of the two.

10/03/2009 03:03:14 PM

NefariousWalrus

@ Bloodmoney. Yes I agree. This comic has definitely raised the bar for all the comedy on Cracked. Please keep these hilarious and witty cartoons coming.

10/03/2009 02:47:59 PM

ClayNation

lol I get it! Its Mario, as in from Mario Bros and hes killed a mushroom thing and the detective has caught him HAHAHHHAHAH lol omg how clever! Very observational wit and extremely entertaining and well drawn.

10/03/2009 01:38:57 PM

bloodmoney

Nah, it should be what's more. He did all the detective talking stuff a la every Agatha Christie novel, and is now finishing with his revelation. In any event, I'm calling meh

10/03/2009 01:34:48 PM

schattenjaeger

Check out the new http://makefunofmyfriends.com

10/03/2009 01:33:12 PM

byjenna

"What's more?" Shouldn't that be Once more?

10/03/2009 01:20:43 PM

verycoolnin

It's kinda funny but not very.

10/03/2009 01:19:28 PM

Flashpenny

I thought the dead thing was a potato with peanuts on top. :|

10/03/2009 01:12:50 PM

Deadsauce

... This is the worst art in a webcomic I've seen in a long time. Were you even trying?

10/03/2009 12:56:55 PM

Tartra

just painful. It ruined my entire childhood up to this point

10/03/2009 12:03:39 PM

mysteriousAl

Would have been decent if it was not poorly drawn.

10/03/2009 12:02:56 PM

Tubba

As if Mario would ever feel guilty about it.

10/03/2009 11:40:35 AM

QuankersJenkins

the title ruined it

10/03/2009 11:35:04 AM

cartoonist

Now THIS is more like it. Finally Cracked delivers a good guest comic (besides Daisy Owl and Subnormality, that is).

10/03/2009 11:04:38 AM

theguy2

Well, the comic delivers what it promises.

10/03/2009 10:56:08 AM

civver

more of a picture than a comic

10/03/2009 10:55:02 AM

lapsedsatanist

It's only redeeming quality was the coat of arms in the background.

10/03/2009 10:15:50 AM

Darimaeus

@kazarkus: your crazy man, his drawings compared to mine are million dollar drawings...I don't know how you couldn't find this amusing, I got a laugh out of it

10/03/2009 10:14:02 AM

SamuraiZach0

It's poorly drawn and ugly. Marginally clever, I suppose, but any goodwill I might have felt toward it was killed by the artists obvious complete lack of talent. Learn to draw first, buddy, then start making webcomics.

10/03/2009 09:56:23 AM

kazarkus

ultimakewl if you were not joking i want to come to your house and f**king kill you.

10/03/2009 09:46:55 AM

Magifyer

Ultimatekewl: Obviously thou doth not understand the humour of thy stepfather. Thou shalt be punished as thus: Thou shalt be stoned, and if that doth not kill thee, thou shalt not receive intercourse for the remainder of thou life, as thou shalt have thy penis severed from thy worthless body. So dictated by Richard, the forgotten apostle.

10/03/2009 09:29:14 AM

SexyNoodlesPlz

TommyTW10: I love that your reply lacked originality and contained profanity instead of a witty comeback. You made me laugh, thank you!

10/03/2009 09:20:06 AM

coeurdouxmignon

TommyTW10: I love that your reply lacked originality and contained profanity instead of a witty comeback. You made me laugh, thank you!

10/03/2009 09:18:50 AM

coeurdouxmignon

boring

10/03/2009 09:11:37 AM

WetKant

Good God Almighty, I think I lost 10 IQ points just reading that garbage!!

10/03/2009 09:11:04 AM

UdoShan

Good Lord. I don't usually even comment on these, but that was physically painful.

10/03/2009 08:53:32 AM

ensoul

Reading this comic actually gave me cancer.

10/03/2009 08:44:18 AM

Funks21

drunk stepdad has clearly never even heard of video games. the dead thing is a "goomba," the short guy is Mario Mario, one half of the Super Mario Brothers. Mario Mario and Luigi Mario have starred in more video games than teenagers have awkward boners. the point of these games was to find the kidnapped princess and kill the evil dragon-turtle that took her. on the way to rescue her the 2 brothers would have to overcome various stupid enemy monsters that dont do anything except walk back and forth not realizing that the brothers are trying to get past them and will likely kill them to accomplish that. fortunately for all these enemies they seem to be covered in some sort of anti-human death goo which kills or maims any human that comes into contact with them. however, they could not get the goo on top of their heads so the Mario Brothers could avoid death and obtain easy passage by jumping onto the tops of the enemies and squishing them. the "goomba" happens to be one of these incompetent, anti-human goo covered enemies.

10/03/2009 08:43:36 AM

ultimakewl

This is the most unfunny thing I have ever seen.

10/03/2009 08:41:29 AM

held094

What's more, I believe the humor is not in this comic.

10/03/2009 08:35:21 AM

acehole_anton69

*Sigh* dissapointing

10/03/2009 08:34:28 AM

catscradle

All they would have to do is compare shoe prints from whatever that thing is on the floor. Clearly the females had no part in it as they are wearing high heals. The gentleman in the wheelchair obviously could not have done it. So that just leaves those two gentlemen and the short dude with the blue overalls. And the guy with the pipe looks like he is the one conducting the investigation, so that would just leave the two gentlemen. So, yes, this would be quite easy to figure out.

10/03/2009 08:25:51 AM

Drunk Stepdad

This might have been cute if it were drawn by an artist that could pull this off.

10/03/2009 08:18:54 AM

pelcurus

To coueurdouxmignon: Shut. The f**k. Up.

10/03/2009 08:08:17 AM

TommyTW10

Much too obvious! And is that a broken table?? When Mario stomps a goomba the surrounding area isn't destroyed. Even if the goomba was on the table, it wouldn't have broken, it would have taken another stomp. This idea needs to be worked on a bit more before scribbling a lame joke line across the top of a poorly drawn comic. I wont even get into all the other things that bother me about this. Please, no more bad comics?

10/03/2009 08:04:20 AM

coeurdouxmignon

This was pretty amusing, I liked it.

10/03/2009 08:01:59 AM

MIntopia

Meh...that's it, just 'Meh' Does this really deserve to be on this site?

10/03/2009 08:01:24 AM

DaveF

I don't normally moan about things that didn't amuse me but, yeah...the moaners have a point here - this was weak sauce.

10/03/2009 07:51:31 AM

DoubleG

Fuck Off! Do Cracked have exclusive access to the worlds SHITTIEST comics or something. I can't remember the last time a strio was actually funny here. Except for Daisy Owl which is no longer linked, and good on it for not associatiing with Cracked any more, it has enough support to handle itself these days.

10/03/2009 07:51:05 AM

Doctorchaos

Take an art class :P!

10/03/2009 07:27:10 AM