5 Great Things You Didn't Know Came from Horrific Tragedies
In Japan they have an ancient saying: "The most beautiful flowers grow only in the shit of Godzilla."
And you know what? They're right. Great things not only happen despite horrible disasters, but often because of them. We're not saying that we're glad these horrible things happened, or that it was even worth it. But a lot of what's great about the world today is a result of history's darkest hours.
Like...

We know this statement is going to be pretty controversial down in the comments section, but we're going to say it and stand by it: the Black Death was bad. We want to make it clear right off the bat that when we talk about a silver lining, we are not advocating that the Black Death be brought back. We would not support any such proposal.
The Black Death, a.k.a. The Plague, utterly ravaged humanity, killing between 30 and 60 percent of Europeans, and dropping the population of the entire world by 20 percent by some estimates. The Plague came in three forms. Bubonic was the most common and easiest to spot: Sufferers developed huge buboes under the armpits, on the neck and in the groin, which grew to the size of a small apple or egg.

Death often occurred less than a week after infection. Pneumonic was the second most common form, and it infected the lungs. It also had a mortality rate of 95 percent, which seems impressive until you learn that Septicemic Plague, the third variety, had a mortality rate close to 100 percent, and even today there is no cure for it.
The only reason that the two latter examples were rare is because they killed so quickly that you didn't have time to pass it on before you died. Much like attacking Bruce Willis on Christmas, if you contracted Septicemic Plague, your life expectancy was about a day, and the end was not going to be pretty.
The Silver Lining:
The birth of the freaking modern world.
So how could one of the deadliest pandemics in human history have any positive outcomes?
Well, before the plague there had been massive overpopulation in many European countries, the likes of which the world really hadn't seen to that point. Along with it came famine, poor sanitation, overcrowding; all of which helped to accelerate the progress of infectious diseases like, well... like the plague. Disease, starvation and predators make up Mother Nature's three-pronged population control failsafe, and things had gotten to the point where it was going to be the Plague or lions.

So, what'll it be?
But that ensuing wave of death and horror set off a series of dominoes that would help create the modern world. First, the Plague left behind a sudden shortage of labor, thus landlords were forced to compete for workers by offering higher wages and better treatment. A lower population also brought cheaper land prices, more food for the average peasant and a relatively large increase in income among the lower classes over the next century.
In fact, it has been argued that the Black Death brought about the end of Feudalism, the establishment of Capitalism and was one of the major factors that caused the Peasant's Revolt and ultimately, the Renaissance.
So if you're fond of modern-day culture or the mere fact that you aren't a peasant, go ahead and thank the Black Death. If you are a fan of being a peasant; how did you get the Internet?! GET THEE BACK TO THE MILL, THADDRICK, THE MILLET SHALT NOT GRIND ITSELF.

If you've heard of thalidomide, then you almost certainly know it as the stuff that caused all those deformed babies back in the day.
Thalidomide was a chemical sold all over the world between 1957 and 1961 as a sedative and a treatment for morning sickness in pregnant women. However, it was swiftly banned in 1962 when scientists discovered that it caused severe birth defects in the children of women who took it. So, on the plus side, it made pregnancy a lot more bearable, just at the expense of those pesky "child" things.

With tens of thousands of victims of the drug worldwide, thalidomide has been called "the biggest medical tragedy of modern times." So how do we find a silver lining here? Did the babies grow up to have superpowers? What else could possibly even begin to repair this drug's reputation?
The Silver Lining:
How about a possible cure for fucking cancer?
It turns out, despite being banned, thalidomide didn't fully disappear from use. In the mid 60s an Israeli doctor prescribed the drug to leprosy patients who were having trouble sleeping, because fuck it, you know? When a dude's limbs are falling off, he's pretty much game for anything.

"Are you sure that'll cure my leprosy, doc?"
"What? Oh, goodness no, but, you know. You got shit else to do, right?"
What the doctor accidentally discovered was that the lesions and fevers of his leprosy-ridden patients quickly disappeared. Since the medical professional in question was not named Dr. Jesus, it became clear that the drug was having positive effects, and by the 1970s, the Public Health Service began a program to hand out this "Wonder Drug" to sufferers.

Though, we must admit, Dr. Jesus would make a great show.
But we said it cured cancer, not leprosy. It also turns out that thalidomide stops the growth of blood vessels, which is what caused all those defects in "Thalidomide Children" in the first place. However, researchers believe that these very same side effects could be used to stop cancerous cells developing the blood vessels which they need to grow, thus limiting the size of cancers to a pinhead.
But we're not done yet!
Scientists are also experimenting with thalidomide for diseases including AIDS, brain cancer, lupus and autoimmune diseases.
You'd better come through, thalidomide. We put up with a lot of your shit to get here.

Chernobyl is considered to be the worst nuclear disaster in history, and the only one to ever reach 7 on the International Nuclear Event Scale. Seven is as high as the scale goes.
It started when engineers at the plant wanted to see if, should power to the plant itself fail, they could keep the cooling pump system going from the reactors themselves. We can see how someone would be eager to break up the drudgery of life at a communist-run power plant, which probably consisted of hauling atoms back and forth in drab, gray wheelbarrows and standing in line for Enriched Uranium. But deliberately fucking about with nuclear safety regulations just to "see what happens" seems to be taking it too far.

And we all know how well this little experiment went down: Two huge explosions blew off the reactor's roof, the highly radioactive contents were spewed into the atmosphere, air was sucked in which ignited carbon monoxide gas and the reactor was set on fire for nine days straight.
Because the Soviet Union couldn't be bothered to house the Chernobyl reactor in a concrete shell, as was standard, 100 times more radiation was released than in the Nagasaki and Hiroshima bombings combined. So let that stand as a lesson to the remaining communist nuclear powers: Next time, just play some fucking Minesweeper.

Minesweeper: Marginally more fun than the worst nuclear disaster in recorded history!
The Silver Lining:
It ended the Cold War. Or helped to, anyway.
Back then, what happened in the USSR, stayed in the USSR. Secrecy is what having a police state is all about. So at first, the Soviet authorities stuck to their communist policy of "ignore the disaster and hope it will go away." The only problem was that you can't just explode a nuclear reactor--and release a cloud of death in the process--and expect nobody to notice.
Officials in Sweden raised worldwide alarm about the huge levels of radiation sweeping over Europe from Russia, and The Kremlin was forced to break its customary silence after 48 hours. Three weeks later, among international pressure and wild rumors about damage and death tolls, Mikhail Gorbachev finally commented, with unprecedented honesty. This is the point when, against the will of the hardliners, the light came shining in.

Gorbachev was forced to be completely honest, and give journalists "unparalleled information," and access to nuclear officials and doctors. This was the turning point of "Glasnost," Gorbachev's policy of freedom of the press that had gotten mostly lip service up to that point. And once the press was allowed to start tugging at loose threads, the entire pants of communism came unraveled.
When the citizenry found out that bread lines were not, in fact, "more awesome than ten million rollercoaster blowjobs," this led to mass dissatisfaction and that fueled the eventual end of the Cold War, and the Soviet Union.








Getting help from Microsoft Support can itself take several centuries...
ReplyAm I the only one who thinks it's really none of the business of the "Thalidomide Victims Association of Canada" whether the USFDA approves the drug? and am I a jerk for thinking that while what happened to them sucks, it's histrionic to call the day the drug is approved "a sad day"?
ReplySomeone earlier mentioned the fact that Accutane is prescribed for young women, along with a no-refills, monthly pregnancy test, birth control lecture, and it's an acne drug. Something tells me women with leprosy, and AIDS (not just HIV), are probably going to be on-board with it not being a good time to get pregnant.
Personally, I'm a lot more concerned with the FDA approving it while it's getting harder and harder to find abortion providers. Maybe the USFDA should make sure that pharmacists who stock thalidomide are not the ones who are refusing to sell the morning after pill. Seriously. Make them sign a contract. Make the distributor package the two medications together (yes, I know it's probably not the same manufacturer-- I got a little carried away with the last one).
So if I create a new, better plague can we get *rid* of capitalism and move on to a *good* system?
ReplyYou could argue that finding America wasn't such a good thing because a lot of Indigenous folk lost their lives, livelihood, land, and other alliterations.
Reply Hide All See All 7 RepliesI think I'm crying. As in laughter. I hate self righteous pricks who think they're better than everyone because they feel sorry for the Indians. Well if we didn't kill them, you wouldn't be alive to mouth around kid.
LOL
Incognito, stop implying everyone is from the USA. It's insulting :3
Herp derp it's okay to commit genocide if people object to you stealing their land.
Incognito: should you really be advertising what a souless p***k you are? I mean that's something most people try to hide...
I completely agree. While yes, culture would be extremely different for the world, it does sadden me what my ancestors did to the Native Americans. I really wish the French were dominant in the Americas, since they were actually peaceful and reasonable with the Natives.
On the other hand, look at all the things Indigent folk stole from us, like the wheel, the alphabet, the horse...
...the gun....
I would totally watch Dr. Jesus, MD.
ReplyThere're probably a few Dr. Jesuses out there. But it's pronounced "Hay-soos."
Yeah, OK, I'll give myself the first thumbs down for that. Still probably true.
Titanic's sinking led to the creation of the Coast Guard.
ReplyAnd it got rid of the incredibly stupid law of having a limit on the number life boats on board a ship.
Plus, finally got Gloria Stuart a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
Wow... Reading some of the comments, some people really need to go back to school or read up on some history.
ReplyThat's why it's never, ever worth it to read the comments!
(Don't read this! It's a waste of your time!)
Accutane already is approved for use in the US with an absurdly intrusive pregnancy prevention system in place. And its used for acne, not saving and/or extending the lives of cancer and leprosy patients. So if they can adopt a similar system for Thalidomide they might be able to get it working and help a lot of people.
ReplyBut I can't wait until I'm done with accutane. the federal government has no business in my uterus.
Chernobyl didnt end the cold war. It might have been a trigger, but theres nothing a power hungry, dictatorial bureaucrat wants more than to be a capitalist (see also: Raoul Castro, Deng Xiaoping). And citizens of the USSR were quite aware of when and how much life sucked. Information isnt power so much as a well armed police force is. The advantages of the planned economy and nationalised industry, undermined by totalitarian mismanagement, were not lost on ppl, especially after the introduction of capitalism led to one of the worst economic collapses in history, but the bureaucracy wasnt stable with them, and they always dreqded an event like Hungarys 1956 a which elected to keep the communism and throw out the lack of democracy. They were always going to try and reintroduce capitalism - they were the bad guys.
ReplyI appreciate the fact that you put "discover" in quotes.
ReplyThis is very true. People should be VERY worried that it took a world war to cure the last great economic depression.
actually a myth.
My favorite is still Pearl Harbor. At the risk of sounding like an Anti-American "communazi" people should know that I'm not condoning those attacks. I'm trying to point out that there was some good to come out of it, namely the eventual end of the Great Depression. It's the 1930's, EVERYONE needs a job, and all of the necessaries that can be bought from it. Meanwhile, a war rages on that the United states couldn't morally enter since it was trying to remain neutral. Japan hits, and BAM! Suddenly we not only have a reason to enter the war, but a stable lively hood for the American people who were otherwise sitting around selling potato Whiskey out of a flower barrel to scrape by.
ReplyI dislike war as much as the next guy, but Wars had a tendency to fix whatever economic mud pile we were wallowing in. The problem with today's war is we don't manufacture like we did back then, so it's just a drawn out slap fight.
Todays wars are a totally different game, the US doesn't have allies that desperately need supplies of war materials and the US has plenty of its own already. If you did manufacture who the hell would buy it? You also don't have the collapse of the European empires freeing up a previously captive world market to the one western industrialised nation that isn't a bombed out wreck. WWII was great for the US but don't go thinking that making a load of tanks and fighting a war is going to fix the economy.
The history of WWII was written in the Eisenhower era, which is why the war gets credit for ending the Depression, and no one bothers to mention the fact that a lot of FDR's programs designed to fix the economy were actually working. If the war was the only thing holding the economy together, it should have collapsed again after the war. It didn't, because it was already getting better.
I lost it at Dr. Jesus. Oh man that made me laugh...
ReplyAnother benefit of the Black Death: those of us with European ancestry are more resistant to HIV, as the antibodies required to fight them off are very similar.
Reply Hide All See All 3 RepliesGO back to christian science class and demand a refund.
Dude... he's right. They've found antibodies in certain English towns that don't allow HIV to take hold in the body. And the first patient to ever be cured of HIV is someone who got a blood transplant from someone in one of those small English towns. They think the genetic mutation happened about 700 years ago, so it lines up with the Great Mortality hitting Europe.
Though I wouldn't count on that getting you out of catching HIV. It's still a fairly rare genetic mutation in the antibodies.
I know this because I've spent the past 10 years studying plague and it's effects on the human race. This is just one of the newest finds.
wonder why the more educated people have thumbs down than the troll does :( that makes me a sad panda
I wouldn't quite say Gorbachev told the truth... his "official" death toll compared to the actual one is kind of hilarious in a morbid, depressing way.
Reply
ReplyQuote:"...but the initial Christian assault took the cake with a particularly bloody, largely unprovoked conquest in Jerusalem..."
This is completely wrong. The Levant, for centuries, was within the borders of the Roman Empire, then Byzantine Empire (same thing). With the rise of Islam, and the general laziness of the Byzantines, this area was lost. The situation was so bad that the Emperor, Alexios I, asked the Pope for help. The Pope, seeing an opportunity to extend his influence, called for the European Kings to help, or better known as the Crusades.
Additionally, three Centuries earlier, Muslim armies attacked and conquered Christian Spain.
Unprovoked? Don't think so.
Quote:"Eventually, due to the rising Ottoman Empire in the East cutting off Western trade with Asia, Europe was forced to find alternate trading routes, which ultimately led to Columbus "discovering" America."
This is the small bit of truth to this article, with discover in "". Trade was cut off when Constantinople fell to the Ottomans, sothe Europeans had to find another way.
A suggestion: More facts and less snarky and self-hating for future articles.
The Crusades had nothing to do with the crusades, though. That was the leftover Abbasids fleeing from the Umayyads. Also, the Byzantine empire was more middle eastern than roman anyway, so it's not like the crusades were an attempt to retake land that had been stolen from the Roman Empire, but rather the disintegration of an ethnically varied group of people who had been forced under the same label for too long.
O.k. Numbers 2 and 1,
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesWWI didn't help women's liberation as much as it seemed, in the united stated of America
prior to the 20th century, women were an important source of labour, but were ousted by
foreigners, because if anything's cheaper than women it's a foreign person. Feminism
was already on a rise during these times (unlike the unkilleble 2nd Feminist wave WHICH CO-EXIST WITH THE 3rd FEMINIST WAVE!!! but that's another story... ) and in several countries were already making laws before the great war started. It was a good political move at the time since most men were
dead, and you needed people to vote fore you.
as for the Crusades, if anything Christianity kept European countries divided since they
split the Roman Empire into an Eastern (Orthodox) and Western (Latin) empires. And
created the Holy Roman Empire of the German Nation, the dumbest Sh#t Europe has
ever seen, since the pope, and let us not forget why the crusades really ended and the
Ottomans advanced, because Martin Luther lovers sought their help, even my own
country can thank its independence because the Ottomans bombed Spain for us, so
we can proclaim religious freedom for all, excluding Catholics, and my country invented
Capitalism and everything good about it (yes, I'm Dutch). The Roman Empire had well
working trade routes before the Frankish Empire (Holy Roman Empire of the German Nation)
proclaimed feudalism and created states smaller that the anthill outside of your house.
Christianity kept the European Dark Ages dark.
It's ironic you say that Christianity kept Europe dark when it was monks and learned Christian scholars that meticulously copied and protected written knowledge throughout the "dark" ages. Which weren't actually all that dark.
You're forgetting that Christianity and "learned" monks and scholars were refusing to do things like, say, dissect bodies or institute quarantines during plague times, either because that's not what the previous written knowledge said to do or because religious leaders at the time didn't approve of the practice. They were overzealous in preserving the written knowledge and ancient texts by refusing to innovate and go against said ancient texts. This held progress back, because most of the western medical knowledge back then was kind of crap. I'd give the edge in preservation to the Islamic empires as well. Remember, before the Mongols destroyed it, Iraq had one of the finest libraries this side of Alexandria.
I do applaud them for their meticulous and diligent efforts in preserving those texts, however, and I'm sure the intention was honorable. That, and geometry was certainly a good thing to preserve.
well, Catholicism kept it dark, not Christianity. I wish people would understand that there is a difference. Even hardcore Catholics never call themselves Christian, but catholic. There is a huge difference in doctrine and theology. Christians were not involved in the Crusades, it was a purely Catholic invention and activity.
ukulelemike: So christianity is only about 500 years old? Protestantism is only an offshoot of the original christian church which was catholic for the first 1500 years. It's all b.s. either way but it does irritate me when someone ignorant of history spews this crap to somehow excuse their own branch of the cult.
Great post, but number 5 didn't actually cause anything good.
ReplyWhen the plague hit Europe it didn't hit a few regions:
Flanders (French Province/Burgundian Netherlands, Holy Roman Empire of the German Nation),
Poland, Brandenburg, (Fake-)(Saxony----...., Bayonne and Milan.
Most of these regions had many advantages over the the rest of Europe before the Spanish
conquest of America, and the claim that the plaque ''created the modern world'' is as false as it
gets, yes the plague lowered the answer to the economic demand, but because of this the many
countries started installing laws that pretty much confirmed your peasant status, and the largest
peasant revolts in those times were in France and guess where, FLANDERS and outside it
was in Poland-Lithuania who enjoyed superiority for the next centuries to come BECAUSE they
missed the plaque. As for the claim that the Plaque created capitalism is also false, most laws
after the plaque helped confirm your low/high status so it destroyed your mobility. Don't forget
that killing of half the population means reducing genetic diversity and don't forget the great
inventors and geniuses who might've been born. The plague traumatized Europe more than
any other event since the Huns, and the Roman empire was hit by more deadly plagues but
due to their personal hygiene contained allot of 'em. If anything the modern age came to be
despite the Plague, as for the areas hit by the plaque with least victims was in Scandinavia
because you know the most manly mother f*@kers in Europe, those mini skirt wearing, hair
breading with flowers, bathing Scandinavians (Manly is in the eye of the beholder) hygienic
skills saved their arses many times.
Could you sort out your line-breaks? I can't even read this without getting a headache
Pretty sure I saw that bubonic plague pic on a 4chan board once. Also, I have Lupus SLE and I find it scary that one day they might be treating my condition with thalidomide
ReplyI would watch the hell out of Doctor Jesus
ReplyColumbus didn't discover America
Reply Hide All See All 4 RepliesWhich is why is in quotes, did you notice that?
Your mother didn't discover America.
Durr. Do you not know what the quotes were for?
joesph smith ___ !