Already you know there's got to be some serious drawbacks to dick enlargement surgery, otherwise 40 percent of all medical procedures performed in America would be this.
We're not sure what the problem is. After all, if it's length you're looking for, all you need to do is give the surgeon permission to snip the two ligaments that hold your package to the pubic bone, and the newly saggy areas can be coaxed outside like a flaccid and horribly scarred turtle coming out of its shell.
Once your dong has healed, you begin phase two. Either the aforementioned traction devices or weights are attached to your new and improved areas to prevent the scar tissue from reeling your unit back into your torso and undoing all of the surgeon's hard work.
Also, your new and improved tower of power will tend to be floppier, and there's a much higher risk of "structural failures" like buckling and penile fractures (surely not as horrifying as it sounds, right?). Oh, and just to make it clear: This is all about appearances. The length shows while your soldier is at ease, but erect you're the same size as before. But it's totally worth the expensive surgery and six-month recovery time to show everybody in the shower who's top dog.
Now, if it's girth you want, that's a whole separate operation altogether and gives you two equally horrifying options.
Liposuction Fat Transfer is the most common, and involves sucking the fat out of your love handles, thighs or ass and injecting it into your unit. Healing time requires several weeks of keeping everything tightly wrapped to prevent your newly stuffed sausage from creating lumps of free floating ass fat that wander around instead of staying where the surgeon put them. If all goes as planned then you'll have a literal chubby. If all doesn't go as planned, then you have a scarred, malformed lumpkin cock.
Dermal Fat Grafts, on the other hand, involve strips of fatty flesh harvested from your thigh, or if you are not keen to add more scars to your own body and have nothing against mutilating the dead, you can find a surgeon that uses FDA approved grafts harvested from organ donors. The corpse flesh is then stitched in from stem to stern along the length of your new Frankensteinian shaft.
For all of you who've suddenly gotten a great idea for a horror movie--say, about a man who gets a cadaver flesh penis implant who suddenly winds up with a dong that's possessed by the spirit of the rapist the flesh was taken from--don't bother. We just have to finish the third act and this sucker will be ready for production.
For more of Susan's work you can check out her blog at Capricia's Corner.
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For more frightening acts in the world of sex, check out The 5 Most Horrific Ways People Have Tried to Discourage Sex and 5 Bizarre Sexual Conditions That Can Ruin Your Life.
And stop by our Top Picks to see DOB trying to convince Jack to pay for his Dermal Fat Grafts.
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